Open Your Eyes
by BandBelong
Summary: The aftermath of Booth's abandonment leaves both Brennan and Booth devestated. But what surprises will be in the cards when Booth returns. Some secrets should never be kept.
1. Just Go

September 2007

Temperance Brennan leaned against the wall in frustration trying to pull off the extremely high heeled boot that had been causing her so much pain all day. She had worn them thinking that she wouldn't be going any where; that she'd just be doing lab work all day, but then Booth had dragged her off to the Maryland where she had to examine remains in the middle of a swamp. Not only were her favorite pair of boots covered in mud, but her feet hurt insanely.

With one final yank she pulled the boot off her foot, chucking it across the room in satisfaction, just in time for knocking on her door.

She looked threw the peep hole carefully. Booth always told her to look through it, just in case someone was trying to mug her or attack her. She usually just ignored him when he told her, but she still listened none the less. She always listened to Booth.

Smiling when she saw him holding the bag of warm take out food, she opened the door, grinning widely.

"Hey Bones."

"You brought food?"

"Yeah, hold your horses Bones."

Hold my horses? Horses? It must be one of those sayings, but this one I really don't get because I don't have horses.

Booth smiled at the perplexed look on Brennan's face. She was so cute sometimes. He leaned down, kissing her softly.

"It means hold on a second."

She glared at him, "I knew what it meant."

"Really? You did?"

"No, but it's completely irrational. You couldn't conceivably have horses unless you lived on a ranch."

Booth leaned down kissing her again, this time he closed the door behind him, depositing the food on the table next to them. She wrapped her arms around his neck, happy to have him there, and almost as happy that he had brought food. The delicious aroma of pad Thai noodles was wafting from the bag on the table and she was almost ravenous. She hadn't since breakfast with Booth twelve hours ago, and the state of her refrigerator was discouraging.

They both pulled back, smiling.

"Why don't we just eat?"

She nodded, and grabbed the food and plates to serve it on. Booth watched as she stood on her tip toes to grab glasses from the top shelf. He swiped a hand over his face, the sinking feeling in his stomach returning. He had debated and fought with himself with his decision the whole drive over, but when he had seen her smiling face as he opened the door, when he had kissed her, the whole thing had went out the window.

He knew this was going to hurt her, and it was the last thing he wanted to do. But he needed to. He had to. There was no choice.

He didn't want to do it, especially when things were going so well between them. It had been 2 months already, with them together. And surprisingly, they had hit no road blocks or problems with having a relationship past "partners".

After a particularly grueling case in the hot July sun few states south of DC, they had fallen into bed together. Brennan had woken up freaked, she'd been apprehensive and scared, but he'd told her that he had always felt this way about her and it hadn't been a mistake.

She had still fled his apartment, and after an awkward week at the lab, she had admitted to him that she had strong feelings for him, and it had been easy ever since.

For being so confused socially, Brennan made a great girlfriend. She was a lot sweeter then she gave herself credit for, and he made sure to tell her often, even if she denied it every time.

He wanted it to stay like this forever, but he had a feeling that it was all going to change. He was pulled out of his thoughts by his girlfriend's slightly annoyed voice.

"Booth! Are you even listening?"

He sighed, making his way over to her, and wrapping his arms loosely around her waist from behind. He wanted to savor being near her for as long as he could. Although he could see she was a little irritated that he hadn't been listening to her, he could feel her body relax and lean into him the way she always did.

He leaned his chin on her shoulder, smelling the sweet smell of her shampoo. His bed always smelled like her after she slept there.

"Sorry, what were you saying babe?"

She laughed quietly. She still hadn't gotten used to Booth calling her babe. It was so different then what their relationship had started as, but she liked it. Not that she would tell him that.

"I just asked you whether or not you wanted pad Thai or not."

"Yeah I do."

She spooned the tantalizing noodles into 2 bowls, as he kept his arms wrapped firmly around her waist.

"What were you thinking about?"

"Nothing really important, work."

She had seen the look on his face as he thought. The same look he got during after an emotionally draining case, or when he arrested a murderer. It was intense, hard. As if something really important was happening.

Great, now I'm lying to her. That was not part of the plan.

"Oh, ok."

Even if I can't read people, I can tell he's lying to me.

She pulled out of his hold, handing him a bowl filled with appetizing Thai food. She looked down, her eyes not meeting his.

She can tell I just lied. She's been spending too much time around me.

"Let's eat."

They sat down at the table, the silence overbearing. Brennan finished her food quickly, and sighed looking up at Booth. If this was going to work, he had to be honest with her.

"Booth, why did you just lie to me? We're supposed to be in a relationship, you're not supposed to lie."

Booth looked into her sky blue eyes, and knew he had to tell her. Now, it was important.

"You're right, I lied Bones."

She clanked her fork around in her bowl, trying to distract herself.

"Well, I guess that was honest."

"I wasn't thinking about work, and there's something we need to talk about."

I've heard that before, it's not good.

"Booth, I've heard that before. If you want to break up with me just do it."

He reached over, rubbing her shoulder softly. She looked up, even if she was confused, she felt comforted by his touch.

"No, I don't want to break up with you. But this is important, and I need to tell you."

She smiled, "Ok, tell me."

"You know that Rebecca is pregnant, right?"

She nodded, waiting for him to continue.

"Well she and Drew want to start over with the new baby. They want to move to New York City."

Brennan was puzzled. What did that have to do with them? Unless the baby was Booth's which she was 100 sure it wasn't, she didn't know why this would affect them.

"Does that mean Parker is going to stay with you?"

Booth rubbed his forehead. He knew this wasn't going to be easy, he just didn't predict that it was going to be this hard.

"Rebecca's taking Parker. I can't let Parker grow up without a father Bones."

I can't let Parker grow up without a father Bones. The words sunk in painfully. This couldn't be happening. Booth couldn't…leave. Maybe she was misunderstanding.

"The only way that would work…is if you moved to New York."

Booth nodded, and Brennan sighed loudly. Trying to push back the tears that she could feel already building in her chest.

He could see how upset she was, but she tried to hide it, the tears glossing over her eyes. He reached out, trying to touch her, but she moved away. This was definitely not going well.

"I can't believe that you're doing this," She was having trouble breathing, and she wiped her eyes making sure the tears didn't spill. "That I let this happen again, that another person is leaving."

"Bones I'm not leaving you. It won't be for that long. I can't let Parker go Bones, he's my son."

"Do you honestly think we can preserve a relationship while you're living 200 miles away?"

"I'm not trying to leave you Bones. I need to do this for Parker."

"I trusted you. I let you in. I thought you wouldn't be like everyone else, but I guess I was wrong."

Brennan stood up, wrapping her arms around herself; she shivered even though it was 60 degrees in her apartment, Booth stood, trying to get close to her, but she backed away.

"I thought you of all people would understand!"

He could hear his voice rising, and watched as tears ran down her face. He didn't want her to cry, and he instantly regretted his words, because he knew how they must have sounded.

"Why because I grew up without parents, is that it Booth? And you're worried that Parker might turn out as screwed up as I am."

"That's not what I said Temperance."

"But it's what you meant"

He looked into her eyes, the hurt visible. He didn't want to do this; he wished he could make her understand. Leaving her was the last thing he ever thought he would do. The silence was defining, and the only sound between them was her quiet sobs. He wanted to wrap her in his arms, and tell her that it was going to be ok. But he had to leave, and it wasn't going to be ok.

"Listen Bones, I'm leaving a week from today. You're not going to see me around the lab, because the FBI is processing my transfer to New York."

She looked up, her eyes blood shot from the crying. "You're really leaving."

"I don't want it to end like this Bones. Don't do this."

"I have to."

He understood why she was doing this. People left her, it what they did, and now he was leaving her too. It had probably hurt her the most.

"Bones, I won't ever forget you. Remember that."

She looked up, her eyes threatening the tears again.

"Just go, please. Just go."

Booth looked at her one last time. He had a feeling it would be his last look, and he drew he in, everything. The door closed quietly, and Brennan collapsed against the wall, holding her head in her hands.

He was gone.

He had really left.

She sobbed and sobbed until she fell asleep, her last thought was that she wished that she had hugged him one last time.

March 2011, 3 ½ Years Later

The loud beeping of the alarm clock woke Temperance Brennan, that and the loud rain pounding on the balcony of her apartment. Her dreams had been filled with him lately. She didn't know why. She just wanted it to stop.

Last night hadn't been different. The night he left hadn't been a good one, and it definitely hadn't been even better as a dream.

She reached over, knowing that there was nobody sleeping next to her, but in the back of her head, she wished that maybe by thinking about him, she had somehow conjured him. No luck, the bed was cold.

As much as she had been trying to tell herself for 3 ½ years that she didn't need him. She did. She needed him, and wanted him, and everything in between. The horrible feeling of loss she got whenever she thought of him, hadn't subsided in 3 years, it just got worse.

Closing her eyes, she relished the few moments she had of quiet. She knew in a matter of minute they would be in her room, and all semblance of peace would be gone.

She heard the little footsteps patter through the halls, and then into her room.

"Mommy! Mommy! Are you awake?"

Brennan sat up, looking into the wide awake faces of her 3 ½ year old twins, Chloe and Sam.

They jumped on her bed, wrapping their arms around her, hugging her hard. She smiled, and hugged them back, smoothing out their hair.

"I'm awake, and you both obviously are."

"Good morning mommy!"

"Good morning to you to."

They pulled away, standing on her bed, jumping up and down exuberantly.

"Mommy guesses what?"

"What?"

"Sammy said that you might not be's awake, but I told him that you would so I won!"

Sam frowned at his sister. "I did not!"

"Yes you did. Renember when we was in the kitchen and you said, mommy's probably not awake and I said yes she is!"

It was hard to look at them after such a vivid dream about Booth. They looked exactly like him. Or a hybrid of both of them. Chloe was exactly like her, she always corrected her little brother, and was incredibly stubborn.

Chloe looked like her, but with Booth's smile. She could never say no when the little girl grinned up at her. She had Booth's deep brown eyes, and energy. She never stopped moving no matter where she went, which sometimes could be a problem.

"Mommy are you mad at me now?"

Brennan pulled Sam down into a hug, ruffling his dark brown hair, and kissing his forehead, and nose.

"Of course not."

He wriggled out of her grasp, trying to wipe away where she had kissed him.

"Eww…Mommy that was gross."

"I can't kiss you anymore?"

"No! I'm a big boy now, that's only for little kids."

"Really?"

"Of course Mommy, you're so funny!"

Chloe laughed at her. Another thing they had in common with Booth, a love for making fun of their mother.

"Thanks, I think."

They continued to jump up and down, and Brennan stood up, grabbing both of them around their waist's as they scrambled to get down, laughing.

"Come on you two, we're going to be late for school."

"Mommy! We're never late!"

"Today we might be."

"Oh no!"

"Exactly, oh no."

Brennan ruffled their hair, letting them down, where they ran off as fast as they could into their room to get dressed. Brennan watched as Chloe tripped Sam, and then he ran off chasing her. She smiled, knowing that Sam was too much a sweetheart to ever hurt his sister.

He was just like Booth, with an acute sense of people. He could always tell when Brennan was upset, and he always hugged her when he got home from school. The resemblance with he and Booth was so striking, she almost had to tear he eyes away from him. The only difference was his crystal blue eye's that belonged to her. Other then that, he was all Booth.

She didn't want to think about him, but it was hard not to. Especially when his children looked exactly like him. She couldn't help but think if he knew about them, maybe he wouldn't have left. It was always a daunting thought, but some things you couldn't change. Or could you?


	2. Departures and Arrivals

September 2007, 6 Days Later

No. It couldn't be. She knew lately she'd had bad luck. Ok, beyond crappy luck. After she and Booth had fought, her car had broken down, their had been a small fire at the Jeffersonian closing down the lab for 2 weeks, and to top her air conditioning had decided to stop working, so here she was, kneeling on the side of her bathtub, her hair pulled up on top of her head to compensate for the hot September breezes that had filled her apartment even at 10 o'clock at night.

And now this? She blinked hard, checking to see if she was imagining things. Nope, the stupid pink line was staring back at her. The same way it had the first to tests she had taken. It was as if it was taunting her, telling her she could take 40 tests and all of them would come out the same way. Positive.

She couldn't even comprehend what that meant. Positive meant that she was most definitely, completely, and POSITIVELY pregnant. With Booth's baby. That wasn't part of the plan. She hadn't wanted children, but now that she was faced with the choice of letting one go, she couldn't even force the thought into her mind.

This just made everything harder. She held her face in her hands, letting the tears seep out of her eyes, watching as they fell fast onto the blue bath mat underneath her bare toes. She was only wearing a pair of shorts and a tank top since she couldn't go to work, and it was so damn hot in her apartment.

She wiped away her tears, and instinctively she put a hand on her stomach, feeling the little life inside her that she was supporting. It was bittersweet. She should have been happy about being pregnant with Booth's child. If she was going to get pregnant, she would have wanted it to be with Booth. But now he was leaving, and everything had changed.

They hadn't spoken since he left her apartment Friday night, and now it was Thursday nearly a week later. She didn't know where he was. If he was even in DC anymore. She had tried to go to work like normal, but every minute that passed by that he didn't call her, felt even more sickening.

It had been Monday morning when she had broke down in her office sobbing. That hadn't been like her, but she had brushed it off, thinking Booth was the only reason. She already missed him. Like crazy.

But on Tuesday when she didn't get her period for the second month in a row, she had started to get worried. When she was extra stressed, sometimes it didn't come, but not twice in a row.

Then yesterday she had had an overwhelming urge for strawberry milkshakes. Something she had never liked before. Usually she was an extreme chocolate fan, but the urge had been so strong that she had rushed out to the diner to get one.

It only struck her while she was sucking down the last of the thick concoction, that she might be pregnant. Pregnant people were moody, they didn't menstruate, and they had cravings. For odd things.

She had delayed taking a test until today. Blaming work on Wednesday, but when the the fire in the lab had happened early this morning, she had nothing to do. She cleaned, shopped, listened to music, and even watched TV, until she realized it was now or never.

Either she took the tests or waited 9 months to see if she was really pregnant. She had voted on option one, not knowing that it was going to turn out the way it had.

Standing up suddenly, she threw the tests in garbage, wanting to get as far away from them as possible. As she left the bathroom, she caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror. Her face was pink and tear streaked, her eyes red from crying, her dark hair piled messily around her face. She wanted to throw the mirror across the room for showing her looking so sad. She didn't want to look sad. She wanted to pretend Booth's departure was nothing. That she could brush it off as easily as she had all the other abandonment's, but it wasn't the same. She loved Booth. It was a simple as that. She didn't want to let him go, but there was no choice.

Her next movements were automatic. She walked briskly to her room, pulling out her rattiest converse sneakers that she only wore when she was lazy, slipping her feet into them quickly, she didn't even bother to change out of her tank top and shorts before she grabbed her keys slamming the door behind her.

The drive was quick. For a Thursday night DC was pretty deserted. She knew the college crowd was probably down town clubbing by now, so the roads were empty. The lights blurred by the speed she was driving and the tears she was trying to hold back.

She forgoed the elevator when it took an excruciating 2:00 minutes to open, and jogged the 4 stories up to Booth's apartment.

She knew if she waited to knock on his door, she would panic, and most likely run the 10 miles back to her apartment. So she marched up to the door, took a deep breath and knocked loudly. Even if it was late, and even if he had deserted her, he still deserved to know that she was pregnant with their child.

After a minute of no response she knocked louder, hating the sound that her fist was making resounding off of the deserted hallways. He wasn't answering. Why wasn't he answering? He had to be there, he had said he was leaving on Friday, and it was Thursday.

"Booth! Open up, please! Its me, I have to tell you something!"

No answer, she knocked again. Screaming as loudly as she could, even though she knew people were probably asleep. She didn't care.

"Please open up Booth! Please."

She hit the door as hard as she could, and couldn't stop the tears from falling. She hit the door once more, and pressed leaned against it, her face in her ands sobbing quietly. She didn't know how long she stood there before someone tapped her from behind.

She turned hopefully, hoping that it was him. She was disappointed when a little old lady was standing there instead of her 6 foot tall FBI agent.

Trying in vain to wipe away some of the tears, she smiled weakly.

"Sweetie, are you all right?"

Brennan shook her head, "No… yes. Yes I'm fine."

"Well you're waking up the entire building honey."

"I know I'm really sorry. But do you know the man that lives here? Seeley Booth?"

"Seeley? Of course I know him. Complete sweetheart. He moved out though, yesterday."

Brennan felt like she had been punched swiftly in the stomach. This couldn't be happening. Didn't she deserve some good luck? Some karma for all the murders she had caught?

"Moved out?"

"Yes, he was moving to New York City. Bless his soul."

"Ok thank you. Sorry for waking you up."

Brennan turned to go, when the lady stopped her again. "I don't want to be rude sweetheart, but are you Temperance?"

She was confused. How did this women know her, they had never met before.

"Yes."

"Hold on a second then sweetie."

The women disappeared into her apartment. Brennan saw the lights turn on, and some bustling about, and then she was back. She held out an object, but Brennan couldn't see what it was in the dim light.

"Sweetie, he told me if you ever stopped by, that he wanted you to have this."

She extended her hand, dropping something cool into Brennan's. She held it close to her eyes, but she could already feel that it was a key. The key to Booth's apartment, why would he leave that for her? To traumatize her more seeing his empty apartment?

"Thank you."

"No problem darling, and if you ever see Seeley, tell him Rose says hello."

The old lady, presumably Rose retreated back into her apartment. Closing the door with a soft whoosh.

Brennan held the key in her hand, the feeling of metal nice against her hot skin. She slid it into the door, not ready for what she was going to see. The door opened easily, and she shut her eyes briefly before opening them.

The entire apartment was bare. No furniture, none of Booth's stuff. No nothing. The apartment that had been so warm, welcoming, and filled with memories of him. Of them, was completely barren.

The thought that Booth was really good, that his apartment was empty made every thing seem so much more…real. She slipped off her shoes, padding quietly across the sparse wood floors, running her hand on the walls, trying to make on last grasp at the memories. Cooking dinner for her. Hours of pouring over cases with a six pack of beer. Playing with Parker. It was all gone. He had taken it from her.

She entered into where the bedroom had been, wincing as she pushed the door open. So many days she had woken up in his bed, his arms wrapped carefully around her, the sun casting warm shadows on their entwined bodies.

Now a hot breeze was blowing through the open window, and the room was dark. She clicked on the lights, revealing a small white envelope on the far side of the room. She picked it up, and read the messy scrawl. Bones.

She slid down against the wall, sighing deeply before she ripped open the envelope. An entire page was filled with his fast writing. She shut her eyes, pushing back tears.

Bones,

God, I didn't think this would happen to us. I never would have thought of leaving you. I don't want to be like all the rest of them. The people who leave you, and never come back. It's not like that. It's not like I left you because I wanted to. You know me Bones; I'd do anything for you. And I'd do anything for Parker, and I don't want him to grow up thinking his Daddy doesn't care. I would do anything for you, please remember that. These past few months have been the best of my life. They'll haunt me every second I'm away from you. I'm so sorry Bones. You won't forgive me, but it doesn't mean that I'll forget you.

Brennan couldn't bare it any longer. Her tears fells hard onto the paper that was scrunched in between her fingers, the sobs wracking her body. The ink ran, but she didn't care. He had no right to do this. He was gone, and she was pregnant, and now he would never know.

It wasn't fair to either of them. She didn't want to raise a baby all alone. She didn't know if she could do it. What if she wasn't a good enough mother? She was scared, and she didn't have Booth to save her this time.

She wrapped her arms around herself, the salty tears soaking her bare arms. She cried and cried until she couldn't cry anymore, and she picked herself off the floor, taking one last look at the empty apartment, and closing the door to Booth and everything she never thought she would leave.

Same day, March 2011

"Listen to me," Booth slid his sunglasses down to read the name tag of the young man cowering behind the flight counter. "Owen, its Owen isn't it?"

He shook his head. He looked quite afraid of Booth, and that was exactly what he was going for. After all, he did intimidate people for a living.

"Yes sir, Owen."

"Listen Owen, I need these two tickets today. On this flight. Not in 3 hours, not in 3 days. Now."

"Sir, I'm sorry that I already told you that there is no availability for this flight. We can get you on on a later flight if that is convenient for you."

"Its not convenient Owen, check you little computer thingy," Booth pointed for emphasis, "Or I'll see that you're without a job in 10 minutes."

Booth flashed his badge, and Owens's scared brown eyes widened.

"Hold on sir, let me check again."

Owen busily typed on the keyboard, his face nervous that the irritated FBI agent in front of him might in fact get him fired. Booth was about to speak up again when he felt a tugging on his shirt.

"Daddy, are we getting the flight?"

Booth looked down at his son, but not as far down as he used to have to look. Parker had taken after Booth in his height, and was already 5 feet tall in 4th grade. He was the tallest kid in his class, and Booth was proud of him for it.

"Yeah we are bud, don't worry about it."

"Ok good, you'll still get to sit next to me on the plane, right?"

"Of course Parker, I always do don't I?"

Booth smiled at his son, who flashed him a grin, very similar to his father's. Another thing he had inherited.

"Excuse me sir, but we were able to get you tickets. The next flight into Dulles International Airport."

Booth reached over grabbing the tickets, and patting Owen on the shoulder, who looked quite relieved that he still had his job.

"Thanks Owen."

"No problem sir."

Booth grabbed his bag, and Parker followed quickly behind, carrying a rolling duffel bag with Superman screened on the side.

"Daddy, are you excited to go back home?"

Parker still referred to DC as home. Booth didn't know why, but he was glad that Parker had agreed to go with him. It had been 3 ½ years since they moved to New York. Parker's half sister Molly was already 3, and going to preschool, and Booth had decided that he needed to go home. Home to the DC, to the squints, and most of all to Bones.

Bones. He didn't know if Brennan would even talk to him. They hadn't spoken since that fateful night. God he regretted it. He shouldn't have left so suddenly. He shouldn't have sprung it so fast on her.

Who knows what had changed? Maybe she didn't even work at the Jeffersonian anymore.

Who am I kidding? Bones wouldn't leave that lab if it was burning down around her.

The only thing he knew was that he missed her. Every day he was in New York, he only missed her more. It was like a part of him was gone. The old saying says you don't know what you've got till it's gone. It was so true. He had made such a rash decision, only going with what his gut said, to be with Parker.

But for once he wished he had done what Bones would have done. Been logical, analytical, thought it over. Because as much as he enjoyed being in Parker's life, he had lost a life of his own.

"Dad? Are you even listening to me?"

"Sorry buddy, what were you saying?"

Parker rolled his eyes and sighed at his dad, shaking his blonde curls out of his big brown eyes.

"I was saying that we have to see the Washington memorial, and go to the diner, and go bowling, and we have to visit the squints, and especially Dr. Bones!"

Booth groaned inwardly. Parker was extremely attached to Brennan. How his son had found a way to stay in touch with his ex-girlfriend and ex-partner and he hadn't was tremendously frustrating.

Instead he reached down, ruffling Parker's hair, as the little boy laughed.

"We'll do all that buddy don't worry."

"Good! I'm so excited Daddy!"

"Me too Parker. Me too."

If only Booth knew, how much things had really changed.


	3. Connections

March 21, 2008

Booth stared incredulously up at the chipping paint on the ceiling of his bedroom. He sighed, pulling his hands behind his head. All he wanted was some quiet, but it seemed to never get quiet in New York City.

There was always something. Cars honking, cabbies yelling, pigeons squawking, the subways running through the maze underneath the city, breaking bottles, loud shouts from teenage boys and their girlfriends. It never stopped. Even in the middle of the night, he would wake up with a head ache from all the noise.

He wanted to go home; he wanted to go back to DC. Where everything was quiet at night, where people turned off their lights at 10 and went to bed soon after, where the squints and the Jeffersonian were, and most of all, he wanted to go back to her.

He had no idea what was going on in the busy forensic anthropologist's life. They hadn't spoken in 6 months. Since the night he told her he was leaving. The way she had looked at him, with so much pain. He had betrayed her; he couldn't even deny that to himself.

He had promised her he wouldn't leave her. That he would always protect her, and he had broken both promises. He didn't blame her for the way that she reacted, but he hadn't quite suspected that things would end up like this.

The last thing he wrote her was that he would never forget her. He didn't even know if she had found the letter, although he had an instinctual feeling that she had. Booth wasn't planning on staying in New York forever, so he had rented out his apartment to a young couple, who he hoped hadn't found the letter before Brennan had.

It had been the only way he knew how to say goodbye, because he knew she wouldn't speak to him otherwise.

Booth had been lucky enough to find a nice apartment on the Upper East Side off of Lexington and 65th. It wasn't anything fancy. 2 bedrooms, a kitchen, a living room, a bathroom. His favorite part was the sprawling balcony overlooking the loomy buildings and streets.

Rebecca's baby had been born about 2 months ago. She was adorable with a perfectly round face and huge blue eyes. They had named her Molly, and even though Booth wasn't related to her at all, he couldn't help but be charmed by her wide toothless smile.

With a new baby in the house, Rebecca has allowed Parker to stay with Booth for longer intervals of time. Booth remembered how hectic it had been when Parker had been little; there was never a moment when the baby didn't need something. Either he was hungry, or tired, or thirsty, or he wanted his blanket. It never stopped.

6 months in New York. It had been a long time. The only thing holding him there was Parker. The look on his face when Booth picked him up, the way he laughed when they went to see baseball games at the Giant's Stadium. Parker needed his father. Booth knew that Brennan needed him too, and every extra minute he spent in New York he could feel them being pulled farther apart.

He was worried about her. The way she was, she was probably trying to hide everything. Brennan wasn't good at her emotions; she didn't know when to let people in, and when to push them away. Something like this was not going to go over well with Bones.

If only he knew.

He was reached over for his cell phone to dial her number, when the doorbell rang, signaling that Parker and Rebecca had arrived. It was Parker's 7th birthday, and he was coming over to stay with Booth for the night.

Throwing his cell phone back on the bed, he walked slowly to the door, opening it, and immediately felt a large weight slam into him. A blonde mess of curls was visible from underneath a mountain of coats and one very red fuzzy scarf.

"Hi Daddy!"

"Parker! Happy birthday buddy!"

Booth smiled down at his son, who had grown significantly in the last six months. He was standing almost as high as Booth's waist, a prospect that was a little unnerving.

"We practically ran over here, Parker was so excited to show you what he got in the mail."

Rebecca smiled at Booth. Little Molly was sleeping softly in her mother's arms, blonde tufts of hair sticking up every where.

Booth lifted Parker up, ruffling his hair, which seemed to be perpetually messy.

"What did you get in the mail bud?"

Parker stuffed his hands deep into his pockets, pulling out a slightly crumpled blue envelope. Booth recognized the hand writing as soon as he saw it.

"A letter from Dr. Bones! For my birthday!"

Booth knew it was coming, but it was still surprising to hear none the less. A letter from Brennan. Booth resisted the urge to grab it from his son's hands and rip it open.

"What does it say?"

Booth tried to appear nonchalant, but he could see Rebecca's knowing look. She knew that Booth was completely head over heels for the scientist.

"Daddy you're so funny, obliosly I haven't opened it yet."

Parker chuckled at his father's eagerness, completely oblivious to the pain it was causing him to stay in New York.

"Are you going to?"

"Of course! I wanted to wait for you though."

Parker might be oblivious, be he knew that his father was quite attached to "Dr.Bones". Even a blind man could see that.

He jumped out of his father's arms, hugging his mother, and standing on his tippy toes to kiss his baby sisters face.

"Bye mommy!"

"Bye baby, I'll pick you up in a few days ok. Have fun with your dad."

"I will," Parker grabbed Booth's arm, dragging him into the apartment. "Love you mommy, come on daddy!"

"Thanks Rebecca, for letting him come on his birthday."

"No problem Seeley, see you later."

Booth smiled before Parker closed the door softly on his mother's retreating figure. Booth preferred Rebecca this way, basking in a post pregnancy glow. She was a lot more compassionate when she had a baby to care for.

Parker jumped up and down, trying to catch his father's attention.

"Daddy! Are we going to see the basketball game later?"

"Of course we are buddy, I told you we were."

"Hooray! I'm thirsty."

Booth ruffled his son's hair as Parker quickly skipped towards the kitchen, opening the refrigerator and pouring himself a glass of chocolate milk, and sitting at the small table next to the window. Booth shook the jug of chocolate milk. There was only a little left on the bottom, and he took the carton, drinking it as he sat across from his son who was sipping his chocolate milk, a milk mustache forming on his lip.

"What did you and your mom do for your birthday buddy?"

Parker looked up from his glass. "Um…stuff, we went and had lunch at the top of the Emfire State Building and it was really really high! And then we went to FAO Swartz's and I got some toys."

Booth smiled at Parker's enthusiasm, he was almost bouncing off his chair. Booth took a long swallow from the carton of chocolate milk.

"Daddy, mommy says not to drink from the carton, that it's bad."

The scolding look on his sons face made Booth laugh. He grinned at Parker.

"We just won't tell her then, will we?"

Parker shook his head, his curls moving wildly. "Nope. I promise Daddy, I won't tell. Pinky swear."

Parker lifted his pinky, and Booth curled it in his. He hadn't pinky sweared in years. He forgot what it was like to be in 2nd grade.

"Pinky swear."

The too Booth boys went back to their chocolate milk, slurping it down in a comfortable silence. Parker looked down at the table once he was done with his milk, making patterns with his fingers. Booth was about to stealthily suggest that they open the letter from Bones, when Parker suddenly spoke.

"I miss Dr. Bones."

That he had not expected. He knew Parker and Bones had gotten close while they were dating, but he hadn't fathomed that they were so close that he missed her. Booth missed her more then anything, but he hadn't thought that possibly his feelings were mirrored in his son.

"You do?"

"Yeah, she was really nice. And funny. Can she come and move to New York?"

Parker's pleading eyes almost broke Booth's heart. He looked so hopeful; Booth wished it was as easy as that. That he could just bring Bones to New York.

"She lives in DC buddy."

"Don't you miss her Daddy? She was your person."

Booth raised his eyebrows. "My person?"

"Yes, Mommy has Drew, and you have Dr. Bones."

Booth looked down at the table, and then back at his son.

"Yeah buddy I do miss her. A lot."

Parker pulled out the blue envelope. "Can we open her letter Daddy? Please?"

"Sure, why don't you do the honors, since it is addressed to you?"

Parker smiled, and ripped the envelope slowly and carefully. Booth tried not to reach out and grab it and read it. Parker pulled the card slowly out of the envelope as if it might disappear any second. His eyes scanned it quickly, and he smiled.

"What does it say Parker?"

"Dear Parker, I know today's your birthday, and I wish I could be there. You must be really tall, just like your dad, he's probably really proud of you. I know I would be. I hope that you do something special on your birthday. Seven is a big number after all; go out to ice-cream on me, promise? XOXO, Love, Dr. Bones."

Parker finished reading triumphantly. Booth knew that was a lot for a second grader to read. He was also in a state of complete shock, hearing something that sounded so much like she did. He wanted to hear her voice. The way it got lower and huskier when she was tired or when she was kissing him. Letters on a paper weren't enough.

"And look Daddy, she gave us twenty dollars for ice-cweam!"

Parker grinned, holding up a twenty dollar bill proudly.

"Why don't we get on that then Parker, we can go before we go to the game."

Parker jumped out of his chair, leaving the abandoned chocolate milk glass, and the card on the table.

"I'll get my coat on daddy!"

Booth nodded, sliding the card over so he could read it. "Ok Parker."

He read it over again, noticing the scribbled out line on the bottom of the page. He could see the words Booth, and then nothing else. Obviously she had been trying to write something, but had panicked and crossed it out. Reading her messy scrawl only greatened the dull pain in his heart.

He was about to read it over again, when Parker called from the hallway.

"Daddy! Come on, I'm ready."

Booth took one last look at the letter before stuffing it into his pocket of his coat, and going to join his son for ice-cream paid for by the women, he couldn't seem to get a hold of, no matter how fast he grabbed.

Brennan sat at her computer, typing away furiously. A new idea had just come to her for her new book, and she had to write it down. Plus the FBI agent they were supposed to be working on the case with was sick. She was glad, he was whiny and obnoxious, and wouldn't stick up to her at all. Even Zach could walk all over him.

She pulled her hair back into a ponytail, sighing. Ever since she had woken up thinking about Booth, her thoughts had been filled with him. It was strange she had forbidden herself to even think of him since he left. She had made herself promise that he was a different part of her life.

The only things that mattered were her children. Their children. She had to make sure that Chloe and Sam didn't get hurt the way she did. They had already been abandoned by one of their parents even if he wasn't aware of it. That was going to be hard on them, and they were already aware of it. They asked her where their daddy was, she never knew what to say. She told them stories about Booth. How he rescued her in every way that was possible. He had saved her.

She never thought that she would be the mothering type. That she would ever care so much about another human being as she did about Sam and Chloe. She had cared that much about Booth. It was hard, because they were half him, so every time she looked at them, it was like a flashback. The last glimpse of him before he turned his back and left forever.

3 ½ years had seemed like forever. It still did. She was about to type more, when her stomach growled viscously. Looking at the clock on her computer reading 12:04, she realized she hadn't eaten in nearly 5 hours.

She stood up, stretching lightly, and pulling her short black blazer over the dark purple short sleeved tunic she was wearing. Angela had convinced her to buy it, and it hadn't been a hard sell since Brennan had automatically fallen in love with the white buttons that dotted the bodice of the tunic.

About to wander out of her office to see if Angela had eaten yet, she ran smack into her friend in the doorway to her office.

"Bren, there you are, I was looking for you."

"I was working on my book. Listen do you want to grab lunch or…"

"Hold that thought for a few minutes; because there's something I have to tell you."

Brennan nodded, "Ok, what?"

"You might want to sit down."

Brennan eyed her friend suspiciously. She was grinning like a mad woman, and she wondered what could be so exciting that she would have to sit down to hear.

"I can stand Ange."

"No really sweetie, please sit down." Angela's face got serious as she motioned for the couch.

Brennan tapped her foot impatiently; she was starving, and since Angela seemed to want to hold in the news for as long as possible she really wanted to just go.

"Angela, I'm really hungry, so either tell me now, or I'm going to go eat, and then you can tell me later. But don't drag it out please."

Angela sighed, sometimes Brennan was insatiable. Angela knew how her friend would react to this news, that's why she sincerely didn't want her standing.

She placed her hands on either of her friend's shoulders. Brennan looked at her puzzled.

"Ok, you have to promise me not to freak out Brennan."

"Ok."

"No running, or screaming, or stomping away angrily ok?"

"Yes Ange, just tell me."

"Booth…is coming back."

Booth is coming back. Booth is coming back. It was the last thing Brennan could even think of comprehending before she blacked out completely.


	4. Struck by Lightning

November 25, 2010

"Mommy, mommy I don't want to go to bed!"

Brennan clicked off the television with an air of finality that both of the twins got, and were quite disappointed by.

"Yeah Mommy Stewen Shelby said that he…that he gets to stay up tills 9 thiwrty and his parents don't even cawes!"

Brennan put her hands on her hips, looking down at her two pouting children. She couldn't help but notice how much they looked like Booth when they tried to get their way with her. He always used to pout at her when she refused him. She knew it wouldn't be long until they started flashing her charm smiles, and that she honestly couldn't deal with.

That was just too much Booth, and she couldn't. She wouldn't. She just refused to think about him. It was too hard; having their kids around was enough reminder of him.

"Really? Steven Shelby also obviously has a problem with lying."

Sam frowned, his small forehead wrinkling in confusion.

"Mommy, I don't know what that means."

Chloe giggled, poking her brother on the shoulder. "It means he doesn't tell the twuth Sammy! You're so stooopid."

"Chloe don't call your brother stupid."

"Why not mommy, he is sometimes."

Sam's huge blue eyes brimmed with tears, and Brennan reached down, picking him up, and smiling at him. Wiping away his tears.

"Big boys don't cry, right Sammy?"

He nodded, sniffing loudly and swallowing his tears.

"Right mommy."

She bent down, so she and Sam were on Chloe's level. "You can't call your brother stupid, because it hurts his feelings."

Chloe looked down guiltily, dragging her pink-socked feet along the yellow carpet of the twin's room. She mumbled something almost inaudible more to her feet then to her brother.

"Sowy Sammy."

Brennan almost laughed at her daughter's inability to say sorry, but she restrained herself. That wouldn't exactly be setting a good example, but Chloe reminded her so much of herself. Brennan could never say sorry, especially for something that was her fault.

"Thas ok."

Sam scrambled out of his mother's arms, and jumped at his sister, wrapping his small arms around Chloe. Chloe grinned widely, and hugged her brother. It was hard to tell them apart, the only significant difference was Chloe's long hair. Brennan made a mental note to cut it, because it was half way down the little girl's back.

Brennan smiled as they hugged. She had been so scared when she got pregnant, that she wouldn't be able to do it. That she wouldn't be able to have a baby, let alone two. That she wouldn't know how to be a mother, without Booth. But as soon as she looked into their round faces when they were born, she had been reassured, that possibly, it might just be ok.

"Ok, come on you two, time for bed."

They both groaned, but climbed with some difficulty into their beds anyways. They hadn't wanted to sleep in separate rooms, in fact they had whined and cried the day Brennan suggested that they stop sleeping with her, and sleep in their own rooms, but they had gotten used to it.

It was logical that Chloe and Sam would want different colors in their rooms, so when she had asked what color they wanted to paint the walls, she wasn't at all surprised when she had heard unanimous shouts from both of them of blue and pink.

She was too confused to think of what color they would both like, so one day they had pulled all of the old furniture that Brennan had used as a guest room out, lined the floor with newspapers, and painted the room in two different shades.

Sam and Chloe had had a blast taking their paint rollers and splattering the walls. When that got boring, they spattered each other, and then when they both were covered completely in bright pink and navy blue paint, they had decided it would be a brilliant idea to bombard their mom with their paint rollers.

Brennan smiled at the memory, as Sam and Chloe pulled their sheets up to their chins. Chloe's side of the room was filled with Barbie's, fairies, and large decals of flowers all over her pink wall. While Sam had a plethora of Tonka trucks, bug jars, and little soldier uniforms that reminded her of Booth.

"But mommy, what about Stewen Shelby?"

Brennan sat on Chloe's bed, smoothing out the little girl's hair that was fanned out messily on her white and purple polka dot pillow.

"Steven Shelby can go to bed whatever time he likes, but you two have to go to bed when I tell you."

They both groaned, but Brennan could see that their eyes were already being forced closed. 7 o'clock was very late when you were 2 almost 3 years old.

Sam yawned loudly. "Mommy, can you tell us a storwy."

"Yea! A storwy! Tell us one about daddy."

"When's Daddy coming home mommy?"

Brennan shut her eyes, running her arms up and down her arms. Thinking about Booth gave her the chills, and lately they had been asking about him over and over and over again. They asked her why they didn't have a daddy like all the other kids in preschool, and she told them that he was away. It was the truth, but she wasn't going to tell them that he had no idea of their existence. It would break their hearts.

Instead she told them stories about Booth. They would listen intently, until their huge eyes closed, and then Brennan would lie awake for hours, thinking about all that had happened. About Booth. She already knew that they would beg until she told them a story, so she racked her brain for one she hadn't told them yet.

"Do you wanna hear about the time mommy got put under the spell of a voodoo sorcerer?"

They squirmed excitedly, smiles dancing across their faces. They looked like Booth when they smiled.

"Yeah! Yeah! What's woodo?"

"It's a religion."

"Do they sticks needles in pweople?"

Brennan bit her lip thinking about it. She was pretty sure it was just a common stereotype, but she knew explaining it to them would just go right over their little heads.

"Maybe."

Sam looked disappointed, but he sat eagerly waiting for her to continue.

"What did daddy do?"

"I'll tell you, you just have to promise to lie down and try to go to sleep. Promise?"

They nodded enthusiastically, pulling the covers up. Brennan made sure that they had extra blankets. It was already snowing in DC only a month from Christmas, and temperatures in her apartment were dropping.

"Ok, so a few years ago I was down in New Orleans. That's in Louisiana, helping identify victims of hurricane Katrina."

Brennan checked to see if they were still listening, and they were intently.

"So I was in New Orleans, and all of a sudden I woke up and I didn't remember anything."

"Nofing?"

Brennan shook her head. "Nothing, I had broken my wrist. And banged up my head, and I didn't remember it at all."

"Was Daddy with you?"

Brennan remembered Booth rushing down from DC to rescue her. They hadn't even been close to being a couple, but she had still been incredibly happy to see his face burst into the emergency room.

"No, but then he came down."

"And saved you?"

She smiled. "Sort of. The police thought that I had killed another man---,"

"You killed someone Mommy?"

"No, no of course I didn't. You dad came down, and he helped prove that I was innocent."

Brennan noticed that their eyes were closing faster. "Thas good."

"Yeah, and we still don't know why I don't remember. Your dad thought that it was voodoo, but I still don't believe that, I…"

Brennan trailed off when she heard the soft snoring of the little boy on the bed next to her. Sam always snored, and Booth had always stored. She didn't know if that was really a gene that could be passed down, but she guessed it was possible.

Chloe was asleep on her side, her dark hair lying across her face. Brennan brushed it off of her face, kissing the little girl's forehead softly.

"Goodnight Chlo,"

She leaned down tucking the sheets around Sam carefully, and kissed him on the nose.

"Sleep well Sammy."

She looked at her 2 sleeping children. Her children. Whenever she looked at them, really looked at them. She was amazed at the concept, that she had kids. It didn't seem possible. Before she closed the door she stood in the doorway, sighing, trying to blink back the tears that memories of Booth always seemed to conjure. She hated it.

"I'm sorry that I let him go. I'm so sorry."

March 2011

Brennan squinted her eyes. She didn't open them, it was too bright. She heard voices above her, and she tried to strain to hear them.

"Is she waking up?"

"Usually it can take and approximate time of 2 minutes to 2 hours for someone who has blacked out to regain consciousness."

"Zach do you think that's really helping?"

"Sorry."

"Bren, sweetie. Can you hear me?"

"What happened babe?"

"I told her about Booth, and she passed out."

"Seriously?"

"I didn't think she would take it so hard."

"I guess she did."

Brennan opened her eyes; the pounding in her head was making her feel dizzy. She saw Angela's concerned face first. Then Zach and Hodgins looking quite confused next to her.

"Thank god sweetie! You're awake."

Brennan sat up, trying to ignore the lightheadedness that was preventing her from standing.

How did I get on my couch, what happened?

"Ange, what happened?"

"You blacked out Bren."

Brennan rubbed her forehead, and then it all came back. Booth. It wasn't possible; that he could be coming back. That wasn't supposed to happen. She almost wanted to pass out again, just thinking about it.

"Booth."

"I shouldn't have told you. I just thought you would want to know."

Brennan's eyes flicked over to Hodgins and Zach who were listening intently. Angela turned to them, sighing exasperatedly.

"Guys, can you give us a second?"

Hodgins nodded, shoving Zach out the door. "Sure, feel better Dr. Brennan."

Brennan nodded, smiling weakly and turning her attention back on her friend who seemed to have so much information at this point.

"So it's true?"

"He's on a flight today sweetie."

"Why? Why is he coming back?"

Angela rubbed Brennan's shoulder softly. She knew this wasn't easy for her friend. Booth had just left. One day he was there, they next he was gone. And Brennan had been the closest to him. If only she knew how close.

"I don't know sweetie. I haven't talked to him."

"Then how do you know he's coming back."

"I ran into Cullen, he was stopping by to pick up some paper work and he told me. He seemed pretty happy about it. That you and Booth can work together again, like it used to be."

Brennan shook her head, looking down at her shoes. The black high heel of the platforms she was wearing was looking quite interesting.

"No. No I can't work with him. Ever again."

I should have told Angela that Booth is their father. But I couldn't. She would have tried to get me to move to New York. I couldn't do that.

"Sweetie, I know that you and Booth were close, but you're probably going to have to work with him again. He didn't mean to leave you."

"No. No I can't. I won't."

"Bren---,"

"You don't get it! Chloe and Sam are…He's their…"

Angela covered her mouth with her hand, her eyes widening. She wasn't sure if her friend had said that right. Brennan had never told her who their father was, but she had assumed it was another fling that she had had…Not Booth.

"Brennan! Booth is their father!?"

"Shh…Angela be quiet."

"And I assume he has no idea that he has two 3 year old twins that he's going to be coming back to?"

Brennan couldn't look at her friend. Angela's tone was so disappointed that she felt like running away and never looking back. She knew it had been the right choice not to tell her in the first place.

She shook her head, and looked up at Angela, her blue eyes glassy.

"Ange, you have to understand. We had a fight. We said things, and then I found out I was pregnant, and he was gone Ange. He just left. I went to his apartment…"

Tears rolled down Brennan's cheeks, and she quickly brushed them away. She hadn't told this to any one before. She had just pretended it didn't happen.

"And he was gone. Everything. All he left was a letter. I tried calling, I did. It's not like I…intentionally hid it from him. I would never do that."

Angela leaned over, hugging her friend tightly. "Bren, I'm so sorry. I didn't know."

"I didn't tell you. I didn't tell him. And I can't see him Ange. He's a different part of my life."

"Bren…don't you want to be rational."

"No! Not now. Sam and Chloe…"

"Want their father Bren."

Brennan was about to reply, when loud footsteps trampled into Brennan's office, followed by squeals, and two little bodies launching themselves onto Brennan.

"Mommy!! Mommy, scwool gots canceled cause of the rain!"

Sam and Chloe climbed on the couch, sitting themselves directly between Angela and Brennan.

"It did?"

"Yes, fwash fwooding."

Chloe said matter factly. Brennan was confused about how they got here if school was canceled. She checked her watch 1:30. She had been unconscious for and hour? They didn't get out of preschool until 3, so who had picked them up?

"How did you get here?"

"Heather picked us up, the teasher cause she saids that you probably were working."

"Where's Heather now?"

They both shrugged, and turned their attention on Angela, greeting her unison.

"Hi Aunty Angela!"

"Hi Chloe, Sammy. Are you excited to not have school?"

Angela grinned at the twins. They looked so much like Brennan, and now that she knew, they were the spitting image of their father as well.

"Yes! Now we get to be wif mommy and the squins!"

Angela laughed at the 3 year old's logic. And Brennan couldn't help but smile. Sam was staring at her, concern evident on his face. While Chloe chatted with Angela, Sam climbed onto his mom's lap, smiling up at her.

"Mommy, are you ok?"

"Yes of course I am."

"You seem sad."

She ruffled his hair, smiling. "I'm fine don't worry about me, ok?"

He smiled, his huge blue eyes sparkling like Booth's always did. "Ok."

Brennan sighed, running a hand through her hair. Why did she have to have a son who was so much like his father? She couldn't see Booth. It was way too hard. He had hurt her more than anyone, and there was too much to repair. Too much that she could loose again, so this time, she would make sure that he couldn't get to her, no matter how hard he tried.

Booth sat down tiredly at the counter of the diner. He couldn't believe he was back in DC. At the diner, where he and Bones sat for hours, pouring over cases with only cherry pie as company.

He had kissed her hundreds of time in their favorite booth by the window. Every part of the diner was nostalgic. It was representative of everything he had lost. He looked over at Parker who was sipping a hot chocolate, and reminded himself that he had gained a stronger relationship with his son. And lost his girlfriend and partner.

He knew it would only be a matter of time before he saw her again. Probably tomorrow, he didn't know how that would go, but he could almost predict it. She wasn't going to forgive him; in fact she would probably be cold and bitter. She would do what she always did. Shut people out when she thought they were getting too close.

"How's your hot chocolate buddy?"

Parker looked over at his father, smiling. He had fallen asleep on the short plane ride, when Booth hadn't been able to relax. His mind drifting to thoughts of Brennan.

"Really good Daddy, how's your pie?"

Booth grinned at his son. "As good as it always was."

Like nothing had changed. If only that would stay true to a certain forensic anthropologist. Booth looked out the window of the diner. It was raining harder then he had ever seen it rain in DC. There was hardly anyone on the streets at it was 7:30 pm on a Friday. It seemed to reflect his current mood.

"Daddy, where are we staying tonight?"

"I booked us reservations at a hotel Parker, and then we'll move everything back into the apartment."

"You're old apartment?"

"Yup."

"So I can have my old room?"

"Definitely buddy."

Parker's face brightened at this.

"Yay!"

Booth smiled, taking another bite of his pie. "Exactly, yay."

They ate in comfortable silence, Parker chomping down on his French fries, listening to the rain pound down on the diner. The bells in the front of the diner jiggled, signaling someone had entered.

Booth turned to look at the women who had just entered. His stomach dropped immediately, he couldn't see her face, but he was almost positive that it was her. She carried herself the same way she always had, with confidence.

She leaned over the counter, resting her elbows near the cash register. He noticed that her hair was longer. Instead of falling down her shoulders, waves of auburn hair cascaded down to her shoulder blades. It looked nice long, free.

He could over hear her talking with the manager behind the counter, and as soon as he heard her husky voice, he knew it was her. He could recognize that voice anywhere.

"Hi, I'm picking up and order for Brennan."

The manager looked at the recipe he was holding, and smiled at her.

"That would be a Caesar salad, 3 chocolate milkshakes, and 2 orders of chicken dinosaurs." He looked again, "Oh, and one slice of cherry pie."

Booth looked down at his pie. She still ordered it after all this time. Maybe things hadn't changed.

"Yeah that's right."

"Your order will be right out miss."

She smiled, turning and leaning against the counter. She didn't want to leave Chloe and Sam for to long in the car, but as long as she could see them, she figured they were ok. She was parked outside less then 10 feet away. They were pretty tired anyways, after and afternoon of playing with Zach and Hodgins and then with Angela on the Angelator, they looked about ready to pass out.

Looking around the diner, she caught sight of a man and a little boy sitting at the counter. That was funny, the boy looked like Parker, but older. Same blonde curls and big brown eyes. He was taller. The man…

Oh my god, that's Booth. What am I going to do? I need to go. I can't do this, and Chloe and Sam are right there.

She could notice his broad shoulders and strong physique anywhere. She wanted to run, to push the doors of the diner open and just run away into the rain, until he left again, but her feet felt glued to the spot.

Maybe its not him, maybe I'm hallucinating.

Brennan shut her eyes, and when she opened them, she found herself looking directly into the eyes of Seeley Booth, the man she thought she had seen the last of. It was all she could do, not to faint again.


	5. What's Wrong Feels So Right

December 12, 2007

Brennan sat in the crowded waiting room, feeling strangely out of place. It was her third appointment with the doctor. It wasn't being in a waiting room that felt so strange. Like anyone else she went for a routine physical every year, just to be safe. No, it wasn't the waiting room that unnerved her. It was her reason being there.

She wasn't sick. She wasn't dying. She was pregnant. It felt like she shouldn't be here. It was hard to get used to the fact that there was a baby growing in her stomach. A little her.

A little Booth. She tried to silence her thoughts. She didn't want to think about him. Ever again. But he seemed to creep into her thoughts. He always did that when they were together, and she couldn't even fathom how he could do it 200 miles away, but he was Booth, and somehow he had found a way. She hated him for it. It wasn't fair that he got to be in her thoughts all the time even though he had left her. He probably didn't even think of her.

I know that's not true. Her brain had such and annoying habit of correcting her. Logically Booth shouldn't be thinking about her. He had left. Abandonment. Betrayal. Desertion. All the things she had never expected to associate with the man she had foolishly gave her heart to.

But she knew he was thinking about her. True it wasn't logical, but she still felt connected to him, even if it was by a thin thread. She wanted to cut it off, pull herself away, but she was too attached.

She reached a hand over her stomach instinctually. It had become a habit. She hadn't wanted to become one of those mothers. The ones she hated, who let their babies take over their whole lives. It was always baby this, and baby that. And baby did this today. Brennan hadn't wanted that, she was happy with her life. Or at least she had been. Speaking in the past tense depressed her.

Booth had been her rock. She'd leaned on him. More then she meant to. She had relied on him to be there. And he was gone. She knew she shouldn't have let someone get so close. Let someone get a whole piece of her. He still had that piece and she wanted it back.

With Booth gone, she felt like she only had the baby to rely on. She was leaning on the baby. It was part Booth, which meant the baby held a part of her, and right now, her baby was all she had. Holding on as tight as she could, seemed to be the only option.

She glanced around the waiting room. It was supposed to be a cheerful place. That's what babies were supposed to evoke. Cheerfulness and happiness and love. The women sitting around her were chatting happily with their husbands or boyfriends, the latter's arms wrapped protectively around their pregnant spouses.

They seemed so happy. Like their babies had all been planned. It had been something they did together. Brennan wanted someone next to her. She wanted Booth to sit next to her, and wrap his arms around her, and never let go.

Instead she was sitting in and OBG waiting room, all alone, with nobody but herself.

She was pulled out of her thoughts, by a nurse calling her name.

"Temperance Brennan?"

She stood up, and the raven haired nurse smiled brightly at her. "Dr. Scott will see you now."

Brennan followed the nurse down the small corridor of the clinic, relieved to be away from all the cheerful happy pregnant people. They were just too….happy.

The nurse led her into a small room. Brennan was relieved not to see pictures of babies or smiling women all over the walls. The way her luck was going, she wouldn't be surprised if the doctor came in telling her that she was dating Booth. That would be ironic.

"Dr. Brennan if you just sit down on the examination table, Dr. Scott will be right in."

"Ok thank you."

Brennan sat down on the cold metal table. She ran a hand through her hair, sighing loudly. She felt so alone in the empty examination room. There was nobody with her. She realized this was the way it was going to be with the baby, forever. No one with her. Just her and the baby. It was an unnerving thought, and she tried to push it in the back of her head, just in time for the doctor to walk in.

"Temperance, nice to see you again."

Brennan liked Emma Scott. She had a wide friendly face, framed by dark red waves. She hadn't judged Brennan when she had come in without the father of her baby. Instead she let Brennan ask any questions that she had, and if she didn't have any, she didn't press her.

Brennan smiled weakly. "Hi Dr. Scott."

"How are you feeling today?"

Brennan bit her lip, thinking how she felt. She felt the same way she did everyday she was pregnant. Like she had a baby growing inside her.

"Ok, the baby has been kicking a lot, so it's not exactly sleep inducing."

Dr. Scott wrote quickly on the clipboard she was holding, and she smiled at Brennan.

"That's normal, don't worry about it. Have you been having any abnormal pains, aches?"

Brennan shook her head. "No, I have been craving strawberry milkshakes a lot lately though."

The doctor laughed. "Believe me, that is completely normal. When I was pregnant with my eldest, I couldn't stop eating marshmallows with peanut butter," Brennan made a face and Dr. Scott laughed too. "Weird I know, but at the time, they seemed like the best thing on earth."

"I guess you're right."

"I'm the doctor, I'm supposed to be. Can I get you to lie down Temperance, so we can take a look at the baby?"

Brennan was about to interject that she was a doctor too, and was usually correct on most matters, but she held her tongue.

"Sure."

Brennan lay down, shivering as her back hit the cool metal of the table. Dr. Scott pulled up her shirt, squirting the cool jelly on her abdomen. It made her squirm, but she didn't, in fear of looking like a four year old.

Dr. Scott was very efficient, and hooked up the sonogram machine quickly. Turning on the monitor she ran the paddle over Brennan's stomach, looking for the heartbeat she was looking for.

Suddenly a loud thumping filled the room, and Brennan couldn't help but grin when the picture of the baby came up on the monitor.

Dr. Scott took out a laser pointer and pointed at the image on the monitor.

"There's baby A," She moved the pointer to the left, "And here's baby B."

Brennan sat up slightly her eyes widening. "What? Baby A and Baby B?"

"Temperance you're having twins."

"Twins?"

Dr. Scott's tone was reassuring, but Brennan didn't feel reassured. She was already worried enough that she wouldn't be able to handle one baby. That she wouldn't be a good enough mother. But two? Her breath felt restricted, she couldn't do this. Not without Booth.

"Yes twins. I would have told you sooner, but it only just became distinctive this last visit."

"Oh my god."

Dr. Scott laid a hand softly on Brennan's shoulder, looking her directly in the eyes.

"Temperance, listen to me. I know this seems overwhelming, but everything will be ok."

Brennan looked at the monitor again, watching the two babies move inside her stomach. She smiled again, slightly comforted by the fact that they were half Booth. It made her feel closer to him.

She swallowed. "Ok."

"Would you like to know what sex they are?"

Brennan nodded, and Dr. Scott shown her pointer. "Let's see, Baby A, is a girl. And…Baby B is a boy."

Brennan didn't know what to say. She stared at the monitor, watching the black and white of the baby's hearts beat quickly. She didn't know what she wanted. She didn't know what was going to happen. But right now, the only thing she did know was that she was going to make sure that she held onto their children as hard as she could. She wasn't going to let them go. She wouldn't let history repeat itself. Not now. Not ever.

March 2011

Brennan felt frozen. She couldn't move. This couldn't be happening. It couldn't be. He couldn't be standing 10 feet in front of her. Her breathing came quickly, making it hard to get enough air. Maybe she was hallucinating because of lack of air to the brain.

This wasn't supposed to happen. She honestly couldn't handle this. She prided herself on being strong. She was strong for Chloe and Sam. She was strong for herself. She was strong for everything that she knew and needed, but she wasn't strong enough for this.

This was completely unexpected. Brennan knew he was coming back, just not so soon. Not 5 hours after she had blacked out after the thought of him coming home. Why couldn't like let her flippin be happy for once. Why did it always have to make things so damn hard?

She couldn't see Booth. She wasn't prepared for it. She wasn't prepared for the way he was looking at her. Staring at her so hard with those dark eyes that she thought she would never look at again. She wasn't prepared for the dropping feeling in her stomach that she got at just being near him. She wasn't prepared for pulling the wall up that she had barricaded around herself since he left. And she most definitely wasn't ready to tell him about Chloe and Sam. Only one thought was running through her head.

I have to get out of here. I can't do this.

Too late. "Dr. Bones!" Parker had spotted her. She couldn't leave now. She wasn't about to run out the door, when Parker was running towards her so excitedly.

She hadn't seen the little boy in almost 4 years, but he looked exactly the same, just taller. Just like Booth. They had communicated diligently in letters, which Brennan had been quite surprised about. Most 7 year olds wouldn't be counted on to reply to letters, but Parker always did.

She nearly fell over, when he slammed himself into her, wrapping his small arms around her waist. He used to only be able to hug her legs, so this was a quite bit different. Back then she hadn't been used to receiving hugs from little kids, but with Chloe and Sam, she was now and expert.

She looked down at the little boy, tearing her eyes away from Booth. She knew if she kept looking at him, her eyes might possibly start to tear up, and that definitely wouldn't be good.

"Parker, how are you sweetie?"

"I'm good…Daddy and I are back home, isn't that exciting?"

Brennan could see from the corner of her eye Booth standing up and approaching them. She couldn't handle this.

"Yes, where are you guys staying?"

"At a hotel, but then we're coming back home to our old apartment."

Brennan smiled down at the little boy, trying to gain her composure. Booth was feet away now, and she could feel her heart beating fast in her chest.

She looked up, automatically meeting his eyes. Crouching down so she was at Parker's level, she ruffled his hair, grinning widely at him.

"Listen Parker, come and visit me at the lab ok?"

Parker nodded, "Are all the squints still there?"

"Of course they are. You can visit all of us."

Parker hugged her tightly, before scampering off to his hot chocolate. "I'm glad to see you Dr. Bones."

"Met too Parker."

She stood up, swallowing realizing how close she was to Booth. They stood there for what felt like hours. But she knew it was only seconds.

"Bones."

She bit her lip, and then regained her strength. Hearing Booth call her by her old nickname made her feel weak. It was their thing. It had been their thing. And then he had left.

"No, don't call me that. On second thought, don't even talk to me Booth."

She turned quickly on her heel, leaving Booth with nothing to say. She ran out into the rain, her tears melding quickly with the thick drops. She didn't care that her clothes were getting wet, or that her hair was dripping. She didn't care that she was sobbing, and she didn't care that he was back. All she cared about was that she got as far away from him as possible before he broke her heart again.

Too late.


	6. Misunderstandings

August 2007

Brennan woke up, sun streaming into her eyes. She squinted, stretching, enjoying the warmth that the sun was bathing across the wide bed. She usually got up at 7. The sun was barely even up at seven. She felt rested. He made her sleep. Maybe he really was good for her.

She reached her arm across the bed, opening her eyes quickly when she felt the other side of the bed empty. She sat up, running a hand through her hair. The sun was almost fully in the sky, signifying that it was late. Maybe he had left.

The little clock on his bed side table red 10:47. She hadn't slept this late since she was 14. She had always slept late when her parents were around, because she had never had to worry about them leaving. After she'd hit the system, she would wake up at 6 every morning, in a panic that they had left again.

She padded quietly out of his bedroom, wearing only his t-shirt, which hung down to mid thigh. Her hair messy from the last night's "activities".

She liked his apartment. It was warm, and comforting, just like Booth. The furniture was so inviting, that she felt like falling down and sleeping on it at any moment. It had huge windows looking out on the DC skyline, welcoming light in that washed warmly over the entire apartment.

Biting her lip, afraid that she would walk out into the apartment and be all alone. She took a deep breath, and was relieved to smell cinnamon wafting from the kitchen and see Booth standing next to the stove, humming to himself, while simultaneously flipping pancakes on the griddle.

She decided she wanted to be stealth and sneak up to him, she quietly tip toed behind him, trying to be as quiet as she could be.

Just as she was approaching him, when he addressed her without turning around. She cursed silently knowing he had heard her.

"You know sneaking up on people isn't as easy when they've been in the Special Forces."

She stepped next to him, smiling at him. "I thought I might have learned something. After all, we have been working together for a while."

He turned, smiling at her, and then smiling wider when he took in her figure clad only in his long t-shirt.

"We have been working together for a while, but that doesn't mean that I can name all 206 bones in the human body yet."

"That's not logical. I should be able to sneak up on you, but it isn't at all relevant to be able to name the 206 bones in the human skeleton."

He leaned down, kissing her softly. "It doesn't have to be logical Bones. Ditch logical."

He smiled, and kissed him, threading her arms around his neck, as he pushed her softly against the counter top. Wrapping his arms around her waist, tugging on his t-shirt, his fingers brushing the bare skin of her back.

"Logical is good."

He pulled back from their kiss, realizing that the pancakes were starting to burn.

"No, logical is good for bones. It's not good for you and me."

She pulled herself up on the counter, swinging her legs back and forth as she watched him flip the pancakes until they were perfectly golden brown. She loved when he made her breakfast. Usually she didn't eat breakfast, but she loved eating with him.

"Are you making me pancakes?"

He grinned up at her, as he flipped 3 pancakes onto a plate. He handed it to her, which she gladly took, smiling back at him

"Yes I am."

She took a bite of one, smiling. Another plus to Booth, he was a good cook.

He shook his head, laughing. "Bones, sometimes I think you're hopeless. You don't eat pancakes with your hands."

She glared at him, pouring syrup onto her plate and then dipping a piece of pancake into it and popping it into her mouth.

"I do."

He put his hands on either side of her, leaning against the counter. "I guess whatever works for you."

She smirked; glad to be getting her way. "Thank you."

He leaned in kissing her; she abandoned the pancakes, and wrapped her arms around him, liking the extra height the counter gave her. Their kisses became more heated, as he pushed her down against the counter, sliding his hands up t-shirt, caressing the soft skin of her hips.

She let a small moan escaper her lips, she tried to reason with him and herself.

"I'm hungry Booth. I want to eat my pancakes."

He smiled, before kissing her again. "Me too." She laughed, as she pulled him down on top of her, deciding that the pancakes could most definitely wait.

March 2011

Booth stood perplexed, staring at the spot where Brennan had just been standing. She was gone. It had only been a split second. He had forgotten what it was like to be close to her. She looked the same, the same long wavy dark auburn hair. The same perfectly milky skin. And the same deep blue eyes. Like looking into the sky.

But something was different. He couldn't see it on the outside, but something was just different about her. He usually could read her perfectly. He used to be able to. He didn't know if it was the distance that was so vastly spread between them now, or the fact that she had changed, but he couldn't figure out what was going on in her head.

The way she had hugged Parker was different. She had crouched down next to him, like she knew exactly what to say, how to handle him. Before, when they had first gotten together, Parker had still been enamored with the young anthropologist, but she had always been worried that she was going to do something wrong with him. Say the wrong thing. She hadn't known that it was nearly impossible to say the wrong thing to a five year old.

Her entire demeanor was different. She had walked in the door smiling. She'd smiled at the cashier, and she'd grinned widely when she saw Parker. Only had she stopped smiling when she had seen him. A look of pure terror had painted itself across her face. Terror and hurt. He hated himself for making her feel that.

He sighed running a hand over his face. He didn't know what he had expected from her. He had left for 3 ½ years. She was so hard to get close to in the first place; he didn't know what he'd been thinking.

Did I expect her to just throw herself into my arms? Bones isn't like that that. Once someone's gone, she doesn't let them come back easily.

Parker tugged on his shirt, staring up at him incredulously with his huge brown eyes.

"Daddy?"

"Yeah Park."

"Did you and Dr. Bones have a fight?"

Booth sighed, "Sort of."

Parker nodded knowingly. "She seemed pretty mad at you Daddy. Were you mean to her?"

"It's not something I did buddy, its something I didn't do."

"I don't know what that means, but it sounds confusing."

Booth smiled, hearing his son repeating the words that came out of Brennan's mouth so frequently.

"Yeah it is, don't worry about it though buddy."

"Ok, but can we still visit Dr. Bones tomorrow?"

Parker could visit her, but Booth was fairly certain if he tried to speak to her without protective gear, he would end up with a broken arm.

"Yeah we can."

Parker yawned loudly, bringing a hand to his mouth. He leaned against Booth, swaying slightly.

"I'm tired Daddy."

Booth reached down, picking Parker up. He leaned against Booth's chest, and Booth could see his eyes drifting closed. Traveling always took a lot out of Parker, and the effect was now only taking place after a few hours of hyperness.

He left 20 dollars on the counter for he and Parker's food, and carried the sleeping little boy out the door of the diner into the rain. Luckily his car was parked near by, and he deposited Parker into the back seat, who by this time was completely passed out.

He sat in the seat for a minute, tapping his fingers on the steering wheel, debating what to do. He knew where he should go. He knew where he wanted to go. Logic or instinct. He turned the key in the car. Instinct was so much easier to trust.

Brennan pushed away the huge bowl of salad that she had just devoured. She was still in shock. It had been nearly an hour, and she still had his face in her mind. She hadn't known what to say. Instead she had just gone back to the way she always was. Protected. She had to protect herself from Booth. She knew him. If he saw a place where he could get in, she wouldn't be able to protect herself anymore. And that's all she had.

"Momfy, look!"

She looked up, puzzled why Sam's voice sounded so muffled. She had to laugh when she saw at least 20 French Fries stuffed manically in his mouth. Chloe was laughing hysterically.

"Sammy, I don't want you to choke."

He shook his head. "I fon't."

"As much as I want to trust you, take them out baby, please."

He spit out all of the French Fries on his plate, both he and Chloe erupting into fits of giggles. Brennan smiled widely. They always cheered her up.

She didn't know how she was going to handle this. What was Booth going to say when he saw that she had children? She could just tell him that they weren't his. Maybe he wouldn't think they were his.

Who am I kidding? Booth's not an idiot. They look exactly like him. But maybe he won't make the connection.

And worse, she felt sickenly guiltier every second that went by that Chloe and Sam didn't know about their father. Was she a horrible mother if she didn't tell them about Booth? Was she horrible if she didn't tell Booth about them?

"Look mommy, twicerwetops!"

Chloe wiggled a deep fried chicken dinosaur in front of Brennan's face, before she devoured the unsuspecting dinosaur whole.

Brennan smiled. They loved the chicken dinosaurs. Brennan always got them for the twins for two reasons. She had them when they were little, her mom always used to take her out for them. And Parker had loved them. It made the happy memories seem closer.

Sam wiggled another dinosaur in front of Brennan's face. She knew that he was competing with his sister for her attention. They always did. Brennan couldn't help but think that everything would just be less complicated if they had Booth around. But she didn't. And the twins didn't have him.

Angela's right. They need Booth. What if he doesn't want them? Of course he'll want them. It's me that will probably subtract from the allure.

"Look what I've got mommy, a t-wex!"

Chloe made a face, "Twicerwetops are ten times better Sammy."

"No! T-wex's eat twicerwetops!"

Chloe stuck out her tongue, trying to think of something to say. "Mommy, what do you think?"

Brennan was about to respond. That was the problem with having twins, they were constantly asking her to choose whose drawing was better, or who was the better jump roper. The door bell rang, and she breathed a sigh of relief.

"I think, I'm going to answer the door."

They glared at her as she stood up to get the door. "When you get back mommy, you have to choose."

Brennan smiled, as she walked to the front of her apartment, loosing sight of the bickering twins. Without checking the peephole she opened the door, curious to who would be knocking at 7:30.

As soon as she opened the door, she wished she hadn't. Booth was standing in the doorway. She felt herself holding her breath, and she reminded herself to breathe.

Inhale.

Exhale.

Good Brennan, you've mastered the basic skills to keep yourself alive.

She stepped out of the door, grabbing the keys from the table so not to lock herself out, and shutting it abruptly. She didn't want to risk Booth hearing them. Or them running out to see who was at the door. They weren't tall enough to reach the door handle yet, so she was safe.

"What do you want?"

"I just want to talk Bones."

She glared at him, and Booth felt like cringing at how icy her eyes were.

Crossing her eyes in defense, she addressed him quickly, barely looking at him. Like she was speaking to someone she barely knew.

"You just want to talk? You didn't want to talk for 3 and half years, and all of a sudden you have an impulse to speak to me?"

"You know it's not like that."

"Actually it is. I can't even believe I'm talking to you. You should just go."

She needed him to go. The hot tears were stinging her eyes, making her vision blurry. She couldn't cry, she couldn't let him see that she still cared.

"Really leave. Just go. You're pretty good at that."

That was harsh, but I deserve it. She let me in and I deserted her.

Her words stung, and it was clear that she was ready for him. She wasn't backing down, and he certainly wasn't going to. He wanted things to go back to the way they were.

"Bones, I didn't mean for it to be this long."

"I really don't want to talk to you. Things have changed. My life is none of your business Booth, so you should really just go." I can't handle this.

Booth sighed, and Brennan was about to let the tears spill, and run back into the apartment, when the door opened itself. Apparently they were tall enough to open the door.

"Mommy! Who's that?"

Booth eye's widened. Mommy? That had to be a mistake. He had heard wrong. He looked down to where the small voice was coming from. A little girl with Brennan's face, long dark brown hair, and huge brown eyes smiled widely up at him. Wait a minute that smile. She looked exactly like Brennan except for her wide grin. That was his. This had to be some sort of weird strange dream. Maybe the pie was really getting to him.

"Where's your brother Chloe?"

Chloe shrugged turning her attention on Booth, who almost was having a panic attack himself. Brennan. His Bones had a kid. She only looked to be about 3, four at the oldest. He couldn't even comprehend this. Thing really had changed.

She looks just like Bones…and me. Or maybe I'm just hallucinating.

Tugging on her mom's hand she motioned to Booth again. "Mommy why are you taking so long, you have to judge our dineeswors."

Suddenly Sam burst through the small space that Chloe was occupying in the door. He jumped up, trying to get as close to his mom's face as possible.

"Mommy, she locked me in the cwoset. It was scawy!"

Booth's eyes widened again. A little boy, who looked to be the same age as his sister was now standing next to the little girl, Chloe. He looked at Booth, his huge blue eyes brimming with tears. Booth took a deep breath in. The resemblance was uncanny. He looked exactly like how Booth had when he was 3 or 4. Except with Brennan's giant sapphire eyes.

Logic Booth. If Bones has kids. Twins. And they look like us. That would mean that these are my children. Ours. This cannot be happening. She wouldn't keep something like this from me.

Sam had tears in his eyes, and Brennan wanted to pick him up and wipe them away, but she was way too occupied at how Booth was staring at her and Sam and Chloe. She didn't want this to happen. She should have never opened the door. How was she going to explain twins?

"Chloe, say you're sorry to your brother."

"Sowy Sammy, but you said T-wex was better."

"It is."

"Both dinosaurs are the best Sammy. Why don't you two go inside and finish your dinosaurs, before it's your bed time."

"No mommy, who are you talking to?"

Brennan's eyes met Booth, and then turned away. Brennan didn't know how to introduce him.

"This is Booth."

Sam and Chloe looked up at him, and greeted him simultaneously with huge smiles.

"Hi Boof!"

Booth smiled down at them. They definitely weren't shy; he had to give them that. He didn't know how to say hi to Brennan's children. It was such a strange concept that Brennan had kids. What was even harder to grasp that they could be his.

Booth was about to respond when, they continued for him. "I'm Chloe, and this is my bwother. Sammy."

She's just like Brennan.

She extended her hand, but Sam pushed in front of her. "I'm Sam."

Booth laughed, crouching down to their height. He shook Chloe's hand. "Nice to meet you Chloe."

Sam glared at his sister again for gaining the attention first. Booth turned his attention to the little boy, now hiding behind his mother's legs.

"Sam?"

He jumped out, smiling, and extending his hand. "Sowy, Chloe just is sometimes mean."

"You're a big guy; don't let her be mean to you."

Sam nodded exuberantly. "Ok!"

Booth smiled, "Ok."

He stood up, looking at Brennan who was wearing a look that he couldn't read at all, her blue eyes staring at him intensely.

Sam jumped up, trying to pull his mom down to eyelevel. "Mommy! Can he come and play wif us?

"Its getting time for bedtime for you two."

They both groaned, "Aww…Mommy. We don't wanna go to bed. We want to play wif Boof!"

Brennan raised her eyebrows, knowing exactly how to solve this situation. She couldn't watch them interact with Booth anymore; it was making her feel sicker by the second.

"No stories for a week if you're not in bed in," She glanced at her watch, "2 minutes."

Immediately they scrambled past her, pushing and shoving to get back into the apartment.

"Goodnight Boof!"

Brennan could hear the door slamming, and the scramble for tooth brushes and pajamas beginning. She knew they loved hearing stories about Booth, so having that taken away wasn't appealing to either of them .If only they knew their dad was standing right in front of them.

She looked back at Booth, who was staring at her. His face was completely tensed, and his eyes darkened.

Oh god. He's knows.

She was about to speak, to make an excuse. Do something that would draw his eyes away from her. She felt see through. This wasn't supposed to happen. It wasn't supposed to happen like this.

"Are they mine Bones?"

"Booth I---,"

"No, it's a simple question. One honestly I can't believe I'm asking you. You of all people I thought… just answer the question Bones."

"No."

Oh my god. What have I done."


	7. You Don't Know

July 2007

This was not supposed to happen. Definitely not. Most definitely DEFINITELY not. In fact if Brennan had a list for things she should try and refrain from doing, it would be number one.

Sleeping with Booth. Right above murdering someone.

It sort of was murder, to their partnership. Thing would never be the same. She wanted them to stay the same. She needed Booth, and "relationship" relationships never worked for her.

She took a second to keep a memory of what it felt like to be in his arms. They were firmly wrapped around her body, pulling her close to him. She closed her eyes savoring it, and then twisted herself slowly out of his arms, and tip toed as quietly as she could across the room.

Even though it was nearly mid morning on a hot July day, Brennan shivered. Booth's air conditioning was blasting keeping the apartment from being turned into the 7th circle, but Brennan was freezing wearing only Booth's white dress shirt.

She bit her lip, looking for her clothes, and then drawing her eyes back at Booth, who was still seemingly asleep half naked in bed. Admiring his rippling physique, she decided that looking for the clothes was better for her willpower.

She saw her black tank top and bra lying strewn across the couch, and quickly grabbed them, as if someone was watching her. They had entered the apartment quickly, clothing pulled off in frenzy.

Thinking back, she knew she should have thought about the consequences, but it had been incredibly hot, and Booth, had been Booth. The only thing that she had been able to think about was…satisfying her biological urges.

She grabbed her clothes, and then realized she was missing a crucial part of her outfit, the jeans she had been wearing. She cringed realizing that they were in Booth's room. She knew she was horrible at being quiet, and she could really do with not waking him up.

She tiptoed into the room, finding her jeans on the floor right next to Booth. She walked quietly, wincing when the floor boards creaked loudly. She grabbed them as fast as she could; pulling them on over her slim hips and tip toeing back across the room.

"Bones, where are you going?"

Crap.

She turned, and Booth noted that she unbelievably sexy wearing only a pair of jeans and his white dress shirt, unbuttoned at the top, her dark hair messily cascading down her shoulders.

Although by the look on her face, she didn't look very happy about their current predicament.

"I'm just going to go Booth."

"Wait."

Booth pulled himself out of bed, revealing that he was only wearing a pair of boxer, and Brennan couldn't help salivate over his rippling torso. She closed her eyes quickly, trying to gain some semblance of the use of verbal communication back.

She ran a hand through her hair, not looking at him. "No I really need to go. This isn't…I mean we're not…"

She trailed off, trying to think of what to say.

"We could be."

She looked up at him. He was smiling widely at her, and she couldn't smile back, everything was too complicated.

"No! We can't Booth. Last night was…we were satisfying biological urges. That's it."

Brennan sounded like she was trying to convince herself more than him and she hated herself for it. She hated that she knew it wasn't true.

Booth put his hands up in defense, "Whoa. Ok Bones, you just need to chill."

"I can't chill Booth. We can't chill. You and I aren't chilling."

Booth laughed, "This isn't funny, and it's not funny."

"No I'm not laughing at that Bones. Listen, there's something I have to tell you."

She glared at him, not enjoying him making fun of her. "What?"

"You and I, it could work Bones. It would work because, I'm completely and fully in love with you," Booth sighed, "God, I can't believe I just told you that, but it's the truth. Give us a chance Temperance. Please."

He loves me. That's not…that's not supposed to happen.

She ran a hand through her hair, trying to figure out what to do. She didn't want things to change, but they seemed to be so rapidly, that she had no clue how to go back.

"I have to go Booth, I can't. Sorry."

She almost sprinted across the apartment, slamming the door behind her, leaving Booth alone, wishing that things weren't so damn complicated. That he wasn't in love with a women, who gave complicated its own definition.

March 2011

"No?"

That wasn't possible. Was it? Maybe he was just imagining things. It hadn't been his imagination that Brennan's kids had a slight resemblance to him. Screw that, it was obvious that they looked like him.

Brennan inwardly kicked herself. She didn't know what she was doing. Lying to Booth about his kids. This was definitely NOT the right thing to be doing. Seriously. It was definitely not logical. None of this was. It wasn't logical that Booth left. It wasn't supposed to be like that. With Booth's alpha-male qualities, he should have stayed. Anthropologically he should have stayed.

It wasn't logical that she had gotten pregnant and had to do it all alone. She should have had someone there. She should have had someone to hold her when she cried and to smile when Sam and Chloe first walked and talked. But she hadn't, and she didn't. She didn't need anybody. Yeah right.

Most of all it just wasn't logical that she had….lied to Booth about his own children. She wasn't used to feeling things like this. Uncertainty, and guilt, and insecurity, and fear. After he left, she had promised herself that she wouldn't be afraid. But she was. She was afraid that he was going to take them away from her. They were all she had.

"No. They're not yours."

Booth looked at her suspiciously, and Brennan met his gaze, knowing that if she avoided him, he would know she was lying in an instant. She tried to push down the emotions that were rising in her chest.

"Are you sure about that?"

She breathed in, biting her lip tightly. "Yes I'm pretty sure Booth; I did give birth to them."

Booth watched her. He didn't know what to say. What to do. It was so different then how it had been. Before they had been perfectly fit together. Every word, every glance had been easy, and now they were clashing.

He knew the result of his absence would hit her hard, but he didn't know that such a violent change would occur. It felt like the Washington Memorial wasn't there anymore. DC was nothing without the Washington Memorial, and he was nothing without Bones, he had learned that when he was living in New York.

He was going to trust her if she said that the twins weren't his. Although he thought they looked like exact replicas of he and Bones, he knew it was probably his mind playing malicious tricks on him. But he had a feeling when he met them, some sort of connection, but maybe he was just trying to reach out to Brennan in any way he could.

"How old are they Bones?"

She swallowed, shutting her eyes quickly. "3. They were 3 four days ago."

Today was the 25. March 25. That would mean that their birthday was March 21. Parker's birthday. She had never said anything.

"All of those letters. Those emails. The presents you sent Parker and you never mentioned that you had kids? Their birthday is the same as Parker's, what did it just slip your mind."

"It wasn't relevant."

"I'd say it was."

"You know it actually wasn't. You were gone. We were over. So I don't know why you're even still standing here."

This is wrong. I know this is wrong. Why am I still trying to drive him away?

Booth did the math in his mind, if their birthday was in March, that would mean she would have gotten pregnant in September, and if they weren't his, that would mean that she would have had to gotten pregnant just weeks after he was gone.

"I guess you didn't waste any time after I was gone. How long was it Temperance? Weeks? Days, until you found some other guy to take my place. I guess you and I weren't more then just sex---,"

Booth was stopped by the stinging pain of Brennan's hand slapping him hard across the face. He raised a hand to his face, knowing that he had gone too far.

Brennan was glaring at him with a look he had never seen on her face before. She looked so angry, so hurt. Tears were spilling quickly down her cheeks, and she wiped them away quickly.

"How dare you even think that you know what went on after you left. How I felt. You don't."

Booth opened his mouth to speak, but he had nothing to say. More tears ran down her face, and she didn't bother to wipe them away.

"Don't even say anything else to me. How I dealt with your abandonment is my business. Chloe and Sam are my business. Our relationship is so over; I can't even remember how I could ever fall in love with you."

Brennan turned quickly, looking at him one last time, before slamming the door loudly in his face. She couldn't stand there pretending that everything was over between them. That there was nothing still waiting to be said, that she didn't long for him to wrap his arms around her and hold her.

She leaned against the door frame, sliding down, her back to the door, burying her head in her hands. The muffled sobs shaking her body. She didn't know what to do, because no matter what she did. And what she said, he would never no how much she still loved him. He could never know, because she had promised herself 3 years ago, that she would never let him again.

Some promises have to be broken.


	8. Close Enough to Taste

**One of my favorite posts of the story so far, so I hope you guys enjoy reading it as much a I enjoyed writing it, it is seriosly fun to get into the character's heads omg...**

July 2007

The last week had been torture. It had been one of the most awkward, most uncomfortable, tension filled week of Brennan's life. Nope, scratch that, it wasn't one of them; it was the worst week of her life.

They had tried to pretend like it didn't happen. Or she had. Booth had tried to talk to her about it, but she had been cold and distant, brushing him off whenever he tried to bring up the subject.

The time they spent, in the lab, in his SUV, at the diner, which had previously been filled with comfortable banter and welcoming silences were now filled with tension and coldness.

She couldn't help it. She felt so detached from him. So far away from everything that she knew. Like she was looking back at it, through a window, except she as on the outside, desperately banging on the glass to get back in.

She wanted it back. She wanted him back. Everything just felt so wrong. Not talking to him, not being near him, it just felt like she was the victim of some horrible…she couldn't even put words to it.

Every single time they were alone, she tried to say something. She would look at him, open her mouth, and then all she could think about was the night they spent together. Choppy flashes of his lips on her bare skin, pushing her down roughly on the bed, the sizzling passion that had kindled between them.

He would stare at her with those huge brown eyes, and she could see how hurt he was, but she couldn't say anything. And every time she didn't think of anything to say, it broke her heart even more.

He had said he loved her. That was the worst part, because now she had to pretend that she didn't love him. That she didn't feel anything. That them sleeping together had had no affect on her, when really she couldn't get it out of her head.

She was done lying, that's why she was standing outside his apartment door right now, debating what to say. What was she going to say? She closed her eyes. A week ago they had pushed their way through this exact door; their lips locked together in frenzied kisses that they hadn't even thought would have repercussions.

Now she was standing alone, trying to figure out how to deal with the back lash of her actions, once again. She decided just to knock, get it over with.

She took a deep breath and knocked softly on the door, waiting for it to open. He needed to open the door sooner rather then later before she wimped out and ran away down the hall.

He opened the door, his eyes widening when he saw her, and she bit her lip still not figuring out what to say.

"Bones, what are you doing here?"

"I…I'm. Can I come in?"

He opened the door wider, motioning for her to come in. "Yeah, sure."

She walked in quickly, not looking at him. This was hard, harder then hard, more like impossible. She used to be able to tell him anything, and now the most important thing…she just couldn't figure out how.

He jammed his hands in his pockets, looking at her expectantly, the now familiar awkward silence filling the apartment.

"So what's up Bones?"

She sighed, closing her eyes quickly, and then reopening them, looking at him.

Just say what you're thinking Brennan, that usually works.

"It wasn't…It wasn't just sex."

He looked at her oddly, and she honestly wished she was anywhere but there.

"What?"

"You and me. It wasn't just sex. I didn't just sleep with you because I couldn't control myself…It meant something to me." She looked down, whispering the last words, "It still does."

He took a step closer to her, but she moved backwards. She wasn't ready for him to touch her. He couldn't always forgive her so easily, it wasn't fair to him. To both of them.

"No don't do that. Don't forgive me. I've been…"

"Just like I expected you to be Bones."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"It means that you run. Just like you always do. But it doesn't matter how far you want to run, I'm always going to chase you."

He moved closer to her, and this time she didn't move away. He reached out his hand, cradling her face, and wiping away the tears with him thumb.

"Booth, I…I don't know how to be in a relationship. Especially ours, I have a hard enough time trying to figure out how to be your partner, let alone your girlfriend."

"You and I, it means something to me too Bones. I wouldn't have let us go that far if it didn't."

She smiled. "I want us to work, not matter what it takes Booth."

He grinned widely at her, kissing her softly. She pulled back, and he could tell she was thinking.

"I want us to work, but I don't want to start something with you if…if there's a chance that you're going to leave. Or walk out. Most people do, and I don't want you to be one of them. I couldn't handle that."

"I'm not going to leave you. I promise Temperance."

She smiled. She believed him. She believed him when he said that he would always be there, and in the back of her head, she could feel that it might be her downfall.

She lifted her pinky, grinning at him widely. "Pinky swear?"

"How old are you Bones, 8?"

"I guess if you don't want to, we can just forget about it."

He rolled his eyes, linking his finger in hers, and laughing. "Jeez, guilt trip me much. If it's important to you."

"It is."

She smiled, leaning up to kiss him. She was surprised when he kissed her back hard, slipping his hands, around her waist, and sliding his hands under her shirt, sending tingles down her spine.

She put her hands on his chest, grinning as she pulled away breathlessly. "So that's it? What happens next?"

"Whatever you want Bones."

She grinned mischievously, whispering in his ear softly, making him grin wildly. He kissed her, pulling her over his shoulder eliciting giggles, and then screams of ecstasy as he carried her into his bedroom, the light switch clicking off in gratifying satisfaction.

Maybe things aren't always supposed to go as planned.

Saturday March 26, 2011

She couldn't remember the last time she spent a Saturday at the lab. It had been before everything. Before she and Booth. Before Chloe and Sam. Before she had anything else to go home to. The lab used to be her savor. The only place she could come to that wouldn't judge her. Where she could find solace.

But then she had Booth. She didn't need to spend her extra moments at the lab alone. She had had Booth to spend her weekends with, and all the time in between with. They would spent their time lazily, a concept which had been hard for her to grasp, but once she got the hang of it, had become easy.

They would go to the park with Parker, watch as he played with the other little kids, Booth's arm draped innocently around her waist. Or he would drag her to a movie, and nicely put up with her complaining about the irrationality of its special effects, and the actors poor job of portraying the human psyche. When Booth didn't have Parker, sometimes they would spend a whole day in bed, his arms around her, just talking and kissing as the sun rose and set around them, bathing his bedroom in warm light.

Then Booth had left, and she had spent her time in her own apartment. Trying to cope with his disappearance. She didn't want to be at the lab. It had been tainted with him. Every part of it brought back memories. She hated him for taking her safety from her.

The twins had been born, and she had spent every extra moment outside of work with them. At first she hadn't even been able to work for about 5 months while they were still little. She had taken a sabbatical, and Angela had visited often, with help that Brennan was very grateful for.

There hadn't been time for the lab. Her kids needed her. Even more so since Booth wasn't around. She was there for them when they were sick, and when they were sad, and when other little kids picked on them. It wasn't supposed to be like that. That she had to handle everything, but it was, and she had come to accept it.

Now he was back. And she needed to have somewhere neutral, somewhere safe, more then ever. The twins had been invited to a birthday party which they had been eager to attend, and Brennan had driven directly to the lab, not a second thought in her mind.

The rain still pounded hard on the roof of the Jeffersonian, but Brennan couldn't hear it, its soothing cadence drowned out by the loud music blaring out of the speakers.

She usually didn't approve of listening to music while she was working. She liked to concentrate on the skeleton. On the person who had died lying before her who deserved her utmost attention.

But today as she pieced together the shattered skull in front of her, she needed to loud music to drown out Booth's wounding words. They kept replaying in her mind, over and over again, until she couldn't handle it anymore, and had plugged in her Ipod into the speakers, choosing the loudest, most blasting music to fill the large space of the Jeffersonian Medico Legal Lab, and to fill her mind with something other then his cutting accusations.

She leaned her elbows on the autopsy table, burying her head in her hands, sighing in frustration. It was all too much to handle. She couldn't even put together the skull correctly. That never happened.

Even over the numbness of the music, she could hear footsteps on the platform, and the far away sound of the key card clicking. Without even turning, she knew it was him. The rest of the squints never came to the lab on the weekends unless they had a case. Which they didn't.

She forced herself not to turn around. She didn't want to grant him the satisfaction of her acknowledgment. She stared at the fractured skull, her eyes blurring as she tried not to blink.

"Bones!"

He was yelling over the music, but she wasn't going to look up. She didn't want to talk to him. He was just going to hurt her again, and she didn't want that.

"Where are the twins Bones?"

She could feel him staring at her, but she still wasn't going to look at him. He couldn't always win.

He walked over to the computer, pressing pause of her Ipod, letting the silence close in on her. Like a black hole, she was sucked into it all again, everything came flooding back in the silence.

She looked up at him, angry that he thought he had the right to do this. After last night, he had lost any semblance of anything that he had control over in her life.

"What?!"

He put his hands up in a surrending manner, but she didn't buy it, she glared at him angrily. Angry that he had thought he could come here again, and even angrier that he had ended the numbness that she had put herself into.

"I just want to talk to you."

She laughed sarcastically, crossing her arms over her chest. "I don't want to talk to you."

"Please, Bones. Last night---,"

"Last night you called basically called me a whore Booth, so I'm not really in any mood to speak to you."

"I didn't call you a whore Temperance."

She wanted to hurl herself at him, and hit him until he disappeared. But she had more self control then that.

"Don't call me that. You think that if you come in here; call me by my first name that I'll forgive you like I used to. I won't. I'm not like I used to be."

Brennan's eyes flashed dark as she hurled the words at him, wishing she could hurt him even half as much as he had wounded her.

You're exactly like you used to be, which surprises me actually.

Booth studied her, his eyes scanning her face. She looked so angry at him, he was almost afraid. He knew last night he had gone over the line. He had been frustrated. How could she have been not pregnant when he left, and then 3 ½ years later have twins? It seemed impossible.

She looked the same as she always did. Gorgeous. Her eyes shone even brighter against the navy v-neck sweater she was wearing, plunging dangerously close to her creamy cleavage, and the tight black jeans, accented her perfect figure. He hadn't forgotten what it was like to be in her presence.

She definitely was angry. He didn't blame her. Usually she would open up to him, but she seemed to have her emotions on formidable defense, which even he was having trouble breaking through.

"I'm not here to get you to forgive me. I just need to apologize for what I said. It was out of line, and I'm sorry. You had the right to move on; I just didn't realize what it would feel like when you did."

He looked down, and she almost felt sympathetic for a second. But quickly it faded away. She couldn't let him get to her. Not now.

"Booth, there's nothing left of what we had. And honestly, if you could leave so easily, I'm not sure it was much of anything."

He could either leave and let her get away with pushing him away, or he could stand up to her like he used to.

"You know that's not true."

He moved closer to her, and he could see her hold her breath, biting her lip tensely. He was not standing extremely close to her, their bodies and faces on inches apart.

"Don't Booth."

"Listen, we are going to have to work together. And I'd rather it be amicably then the way it has been going so far. I don't want to spend my days fighting with you."

Brennan knew she should move. That she shouldn't be standing so close to him. It was way past dangerous, every alert system in her body was ringing loudly, but she had missed being close to him, and instead she stood her ground.

"You brought it on yourself Booth. Maybe you should have thought about the repercussions before you just picked up and left."

"You don't think that I regret that Bones? Regret leaving you? I do. More than anything."

That was it, she stepped away from him. Any closer and she knew she wouldn't be able to pull away.

"I have to go."

She turned, but he grabbed her, spinning her around to face him. She felt shivers shoot up where his hand was grasping her arm tightly. She looked up into his eyes, the comfort that they brought washed over her. Temporarily she forgot everything. All that mattered was that he was there. Their faces were so close, and she leaned up like she always had, their lips almost touching. Literally a centimeter, but she pulled away, shaking her head.

"God, what am I doing? I have to go."

"Bones I didn't mean to."

"No it wasn't your fault, I'm just…I need to go."

She grabbed her Ipod, running down the steps, disappearing through the sliding doors. Booth knew it wouldn't do any good to chase her, and instead her leaned against the autopsy table, leaning his head in his hands, cursing his stupidity for making her get close when she wasn't ready. He knew that with Brennan it was opposites. Being close pushed her farther away, and right now, she seemed like she was a universe away.

Unattainable.


	9. My Fix

August 2007

The sunset from the steps of Lincoln Memorial was a sight to behold. The sun seemed to burn crimson before it dipped beneath the golden sky, setting the sky on fire with shades of scarlet and burgundy before it disappeared completely, its reflection still dancing hauntingly on the rippling surface of the wading pool.

The sun cast its last light on the couple perched comfortably on the steps. Booth and Brennan were sitting on the steps of the memorial, a spot which Brennan had deemed as irrational and not logical to eat ice cream on at sunset, but Booth had dragged her along, promising that it would be great.

It had lived up to her expectations, and then some. It was definitely the best view of the sunset from the whole city, and she wanted to just sit there forever, watching as the already pink sky delicately shifted into navy blue, and then the inkiest of black, the stars popping up everywhere like diamonds.

His arms were wrapped around her tightly, and she shivered, glad that he was there to keep her warm. She was wearing a white tank top and shorts. It was a Saturday and had been well over 90 degrees on the hot August day, so she hadn't expected to get cold.

Although she knew the giant chocolate ice cream cone she was divulging in wasn't helping her cause. She bit the cone, happy to be getting to her favorite part.

"Taste good Bones?"

She turned around, smiling broadly at him. "Yes, thank you."

"I told you this would be the best view in the entire city. I come here all the time with Parker. We get ice cream too."

"I imagine the experience is a little bit different with me though. Seeing as I'm not your son."

He leaned down, kissing her hair softly, and then she tilted her face, so their lips met in a soft kiss. She let her tongue mingle slightly with his.

"No, you are definitely…" He kissed her again softly, "Not my son."

"That's good to know. Even though logically it's not possible."

"I'm glad." Booth interlaced his fingers with hers, smiling at her.

They continued to eat their ice cream in comfortable silence. The day had been nice, better then nice actually. They had woken up late, gone to the diner for nice tall stack of blueberry pancakes, and then walked around DC, and eventually stopping for ice cream. Booth had noted that they were near the Lincoln Memorial, and had almost made her run through the park in order to get there before sunset. She had glared at him for a while, while he was dragging her but he knew that it was worth it.

She leaned into him, closing her eyes for a minute, and then reopening them, as if she was deep in thought about something.

He could tell she was thinking about things. In the month they had been dating, a lot of things had become quite apparent to him. The most surprising of them all, was how much he was really falling for her. Completely and head over heels. Not that he hadn't been before. But this was different. Being with her as her boyfriend was so different then being her friend her partner, it was like night and day.

He was about to speak when she beat him to the punch, and he could tell what she was going to say was important, so he let her continue talking.

"My parents used to take me and Russ to watch the sunset. There was this field by our house, and we used to have to sneak through the neighbor's backyard to get to it. I remember being so scared that we'd be caught, but we never did. We would sit in the field, watching the sun set, and my dad would always tell me that 6 billion other people in the world were watching the same sun. I always thought that was so amazing, its part of the reason I wanted to be an anthropologist. This reminds me of that. Watching the sunset."

He turned her to face him, and he could see her eyes were glassy from held back tears. She wiped them away quickly, and he leaned down kissing her softly.

"Listen Bones, I know that it's hard for you to remember. But it's important that you do. Our memories are what make us ourselves."

"I know…that's why I told you."

"I think it's true, what your dad said about all those people. It's true. We like to think we're the only ones out there, but there are so many more people, watching. Remembering, just like you."

"Booth, when I'm with you… I feel like I'm the only one."

"Bones, it's always been you. You feel that way, because you always have been the only one. And I've tried to deny it, and I've tried to fight it, but I can't. You're undeniable."

She smiled, as he leaned down kissing her softly. She leaned back into him, as he stroked her hair, feeling her heart beat rhythmically against his chest. It only made it even more real.

They sat there until the sun had set, and there was no memory of the sun left on the water's surface. Ol' Honest Abe, smiled down at the couple, who had finally found the one thing that they had been looking for.

Each other.

The problem with finding things is they always get lost.

March 27, 2011

Brennan sighed loudly as she stared out the window of her apartment, her knees drawn up to her chest, her chin resting softly on them. The rain beat down hard, bouncing off of the roofs below her apartment, and settling in deep puddles on the sidewalks.

It wasn't exactly her ideal Sunday to be spending the entire day, basically stuck in her apartment with 2 three year olds. It wasn't Sam and Chloe so much that were driving her crazy, but their urge to bounce around the apartment like they had just drank way too much Red Bull, which she reminded herself was impossible because she didn't even have any in the apartment.

That had happened once. Somehow they had poured Red Bull into their sippy cups instead of water, and Brennan had found herself with the most hyper active wild 2 and a half year olds on the planet. That had been the last time she had bought Red Bull.

She smiled at the memory, even though it had been a bit of a pain at the time. She glanced over at the twins, frowning slightly when she saw what they were doing. They had been jumping up and down, climbing all over her, clamoring for something to do.

Usually on Sundays she would take them to the playground to play, or to the diner for slices of cherry pie. Sometimes they would visit the memorials, or Brennan would play soccer with them on the large lawn in Rock Creek Park. She loved how happy they looked when they scored goals on her, their small faces lighting up.

Without the ability of going outside, their day had been somewhat limited, and Brennan could see that they had found their own way to entertain themselves. They both had mixing bowls fixed on their laps, each of which seemed to be overflowing with greenish blue bubbles.

"Chloe? Sam? What are you doing?"

They turned and looked at her sheepishly, hiding the bowls behind them, and smiling widely.

"Nothing mommy!"

"Nothing really? So if I was to come over there, there would be nothing in those bowls of yours?"

Sam elbowed Chloe, "I tells you she would know!"

Chloe stuck her tongue out at her brother, raising a finger to her lips and shushing him loudly.

"Mommy we were just cooking!"

Sam looked at Chloe suspiciously, raising his eyebrows, and crossing his arms across him chest, in a very Booth-like manner that made Brennan smile and want to cry at the same time.

"Ok, just make sure you don't 'cook' on the furniture."

They both nodded exuberantly. "Don't wowy mommy, we won't spill!"

She nodded, laughing softly as they scurried back into the kitchen, whispering loudly.

"Ok."

She lay her chin back on her knees, staring out the window, feeling trapped. She snuggled into the large grey sweater that she was wearing; her feet warm in her favorite pair of fuzzy knee socks. Wishing that they would give her as much comfort as they usually did.

She didn't know what was going on with her anymore. Yesterday. She closed her eyes, remembering every tiny detail that was still lodged obnoxiously in her mind. Yesterday had been…so confusing.

She had almost kissed Booth. Booth. Ex-boyfriend, ex-partner, unknown illegitimate father of her children, the man who had abandoned her, Booth. How had that happened? It was so wrong, everything that was happening just seemed so wrong. But at the time it had seemed so right.

For a split second it felt like that was what was supposed to happen. That she was supposed to forgive him, kiss him, and that everything would be all right. Luckily she had regained her consciousness, literally not a second too late. Their lips had been almost touching, and she almost could taste his lips on hers.

She shouldn't have even let herself get that close. That had been way past where she had drawn the line. Way past where it had been safe.

I've crossed the lines before. But not again. I won't.

Worse she was feeling horribly guilty for lying. She wasn't a liar. She had never lied to Booth before. Especially about something as important as this. But some how, she felt like it was the right thing to do.

If it's the right thing, why do I feel so horrible.

She hated that she felt guilty. He was the one that had left her. Left her pregnant, alone, and still horribly in love with him.

I'm still in love with him. That's why I feel so horrible.

She wanted to hurl something across the room for still feeling like that. It wasn't supposed to be like that. She was supposed to be able to forget him. That's what he did. Why did she have to be the one so attached this time?

Within days, no hours of his arrival, she had found herself pulled back into everything she tried to leave behind. She had almost kissed him again. She obviously had no self control, rationality, or any idea to protect herself from him. She had thought she had it. Apparently not.

She closed her eyes, listening to the rain beat rhythmically on the pavement below. The weather was reflecting her mood. Dark and depressing.

Just as she almost could feel sleep was over her, the knock came on the door. She wasn't sure if she was hearing correctly or if she was just conjuring sound from the continuous downpour.

Coming to the conclusion that someone was really knocking on the door, she quickly walked across the hallway, and opened it quickly without checking the peep hole. For the 2nd time all weekend, she wished she had checked.

"Are you stalking me?"

Booth was slightly comforted by the small smile that played weakly across her face. It had been the first time she had smiled since he had seen her. Or at least smiled at him.

He smiled back at her, and she looked away. She couldn't handle that smile; it was too nostalgic of better days. When he had loved her.

"No, I just wanted to come and apologize for what happened yesterday."

The smile vanished from her face; in place was the emotionless mask that he seemed to be eliciting from her a lot lately. Although her face looked unaffected, he could see her eyes staring back at him questioningly.

"Nothing happened yesterday Booth. You don't need to apologize for anything."

"No, I shouldn't be pressuring you to talk to me. I understand why you wouldn't want to ever again."

"Actually, you don't understand, but I accept your apology," She looked down, and then back up at him, "For both things."

"Ok, so we're good?"

She sighed, crossing her arms over her chest. "No."

"No?"

"No we're not good. I can't be 'good' with you Booth. I'll work with you without fighting you, but I'm not going to be your friend. Things can't go back the way they used to."

"They won't go back if you don't want them to."

"You don't get it. I can't go back. Too much has happened Booth, and you weren't a part of it."

Booth didn't know how to fix this. He couldn't go back in time. He couldn't change what had happened. The fact that she had moved on, that he had left her. He wished he could.

"If that's what you want."

"It is."

"So you and me, just partners."

Maybe if I keep telling myself this, I'll believe it.

She nodded, "Just partners. There's nothing left Booth."

I don't want to be just partners with him. But I have to be. It's the only way I won't get hurt.

"Listen Bones, I know you're set on not living in the past. I understand that. It's logical."

She raised her eyebrows, looking at him expectantly.

"Yes."

"But, I'm sure you haven't eaten very much today, and I was wondering if you wanted to get some lunch? You can bring Sam and Chloe. They can play with Parker, he'll love them."

"Lunch?"

She looked at him blankly. "Yeah lunch, comes after breakfast, before dinner."

"I know what lunch is Booth."

"I know you want to be just partners, but partners have to eat, right?"

"Booth, I don't know…" This isn't smart Brennan. I shouldn't go, right? That would be bad.

"Please Bones. Even if you don't care about us, I want to fix it. Even if it's just partners."

You can't fix me. It's your fault that I'm broken.

She found herself agreeing to lunch with him. She didn't know what she was doing, but it felt right. He felt right. He always had.

"Fine, I'll go. But don't feel and obligation to fix me Booth. I'm not part of your life anymore."

Booth found himself smiling widely that she had agreed. Any time with her was better then nothing. Before he could speak, she continued talking.

"I'll meet you at the diner in 15 minutes."

With that she turned, slamming the door in his face, but this time Booth was grinning widely as he walked down the hall, tossing his keys in his hands. Maybe he could fix things. Maybe there was a chance in hell, that things were going to be all right.


	10. Close Encounters

August 2007

Brennan woke up early. She could tell because the sun wasn't even peaking over the horizon through Booth's window. The sky was still a pale pink as the stars began to fade, not showing their faces again until the moon rose again.

She shut her eyes tightly, trying to get back to sleep. She snuggled closely into Booth's arms which were wrapped tightly around her body, trying to relax and let sleep overcome her.

She had easily gotten used to waking up in Booth's arms. She loved the way he would wrap his arms tightly around her before they went to sleep, running his knuckles softly up her arm, sending shivers down her spine every time they touched. He would kiss her neck softly, before he would whisper goodnight huskily in her ear. His warm breath making her grin widely in the dark.

It was a rare occurrence that she could actually fall asleep after that, and they usually spent the next part of the night engaging in much more pleasurable 'activities'.

But she couldn't find her way back to sleep. She opened her eyes again, leaning over slightly to see what time it was. The neon red letters flashed at exactly 7:00 am. She should have been more tired. In fact she should have been exhausted.

She and Booth had slaved over finishing a particularly emotionally and physically draining case whose victim had been an 8-year old girl, found 30 feet down in a cave in Virginia. They had worked all week, spelunking down through the caves, scrounging around in the dark for clues to her murder, and then finally coming to a disappointing culmination when they found her murderer who had committed suicide, hours before they came to arrest him.

If that wasn't enough they had to go back to the lab, compare notes, fill out all the paper work, and scramble to put together the case for the prosecutors. Of course they had had Wong Fu's to push them along, but it had been just past 1 am when they had shuffled into his apartment, half asleep. It was a Friday night, and they had hoped to finish early and spend time with Parker for the night, but luck hadn't been on their side.

As soon as her head had hit the pillows she had fallen asleep, but she couldn't seem to regain that feeling. Instead she was filled with energy, the adrenaline shooting through her veins like rapid fire. Usually after cases like this one she felt drained. Discouraged, but right now she felt like all she needed was to move.

She carefully slid out from under Booth's arms, smiling when he didn't even flinch. She knew he was exhausted, and it would be good to let him sleep.

Maybe she would go for a run. Running always quieted her mind. The feeling of hitting the pavement hard, with no one to judge you, just the sound of her heart beating loudly in her ears. She needed to clean out the thoughts of the case.

She used to spend the weekends at the lab. Slaving over ancient remains, bodies from limbo, and anything else she could get her science starved hands on. She didn't have anybody to spend the weekends with, and she would rather have the companionship of skeletons then sit in her apartment all alone.

But things had changed. She had Booth now. She didn't have to be alone, and the time that they spent together, she would rather have it not tainted by memory of murder and despair. She wanted to be with Booth without being his partner. When they weren't in the lab, she was his girlfriend. His Bones, nothing else.

She took one last look at Booth who was snoring softly, smiled, and closed the door, tip toeing out into the apartment to search for her bag which she had dropped at some not designated spot at the un-godly hour they had gotten in at last night.

"Dr. Bones! You're awake so early!"

She had forgotten that Parker at the age of 5, would wake up extremely early. She smiled, walking over to where the little boy seemed to be coloring in a giraffe with a purple crayon.

Why is the giraffe purple? It's not logical.

"I couldn't sleep. What are you drawing?"

She kneeled down so she was at him level, leaning her elbows on the small plastic play table where crayons were strewn messily, and giraffes were purple.

"A gerraffe," Parker scrunched up his little face in deep thought, "I mean giraffe!"

Brennan smiled widely. "Why is the giraffe purple?"

Parker bit his thumb, looking down at his giraffe. "Um...uh, cause I want it to be Dr. Bones. Yellow giraffes are boring!"

Brennan smiled, decided that that much logic was good enough for her. "I agree."

Parker nodded as if it was obvious that she would agree. Who wouldn't? He pointed a chubby finger at his paper, pointing out animals to her. "And look. This is the zebwa, and the parrot, and the lion, and the gazelle!"

The paper was covered with blue lions, pink and yellow zebras, a black parrot, and green gazelles. Brennan had to giggle uncharacteristically at how funny it looked. But she liked it. She decided that instead of running, being with Parker would be liberating enough.

"Its beautiful."

"Thank you!"

Parker picked up a bright red crayon, coloring in an alligator that appeared to be leaning over to drink at a watering whole. She noted how intensely he seemed to be concentrating on coloring exactly in the lines.

"Hey Parker, how do you feel about getting pancakes?"

He instantly dropped his crayon, his huge brown eyes sparkling with only the amount of excitement a 5 year old can get away with.

"Pancakes! I love pancakes!"

She ruffled his hair, smiling. "I know you do, so I thought we would go and pick some up and bring some back for your dad."

"Is Daddy still asleep?"

"Yes he's really tired."

"Daddy is lazy sometimes," Parker eyes widened, and Brennan stifled a laugh. "But don't tell him I said that's. He might get mad."

Brennan put her finger to her lips, "I won't tell him, don't worry."

Parker nodded a satisfied smile on his lips, "Good."

He grabbed Brennan's hand, pulling her up with a lot of strength for a little boy, and dragging her across the apartment.

"Come on Dr. Bones, let's get pancakes."

She laughed, letting herself be pulled across the apartment.

"Hold on Parker, I have to change out of my pajamas first."

He crossed his arms over his chest, glaring at her in a way that made him look even more like Booth then he already did.

"Ok, but hurry up, I'm hungry."

She laughed at his bossiness, and watched as he stared at her while she pulled out her white shorts and tank top from her bag.

"Just wait a minute, I'll get dressed, and I have to write you dad a note."

"Go fast!"

"I will, I will. Parker you're just like your dad."

He beamed proudly. "Thank you!"

That certainly is something that you want to aspire to. Parker's lucky to have some one who loves him so much. And so am I.

Brennan carefully opened the door to Booth's apartment. She didn't know if he was asleep or not, but she didn't want to wake him if he was. Yet.

Parker followed behind her, humming happily to himself. He was almost completely covered in syrup and completely hyper from the chocolate chip pancakes he had consumed.

She had found that Parker was almost a better remedy to clear her mind then running was. He had filled her mind with stories of Kindergarten, dinosaurs, and a lizard he had found outside a few days ago.

"Dr. Bones! That was so yummy, thanks for taking me."

"You're welcome Parker."

"Can I watch cartoons?"

She nodded, "Sure." She wanted to spend some time alone with Booth. She loved Parker to death, but he had a certain way to kill a mood.

"Yay!" He scrambled across the apartment, plopping down on the couch, and clicking on the remote to the world of animated dragons and sponges.

Brennan removed the flip flops that she was wearing, tip toeing slowly into Booth's room. She opened the door, wincing when it creaked.

She smiled seeing that he was still fast asleep. It was already 8:30, and she decided that he had had enough time to sleep. Now she wanted him awake. She could only wait with Parker for so long.

She crawled onto the bed, the pancakes that she had brought him in hand. She moved up so she was sitting next to his chest, leaning back on her heels.

"Booth…Booth wake up."

He didn't stir, and he frowned, bouncing up and down a little on the bed to alert him to her presence. She didn't like to be ignored.

"Booth. Wake up. I brought you pancakes."

She slid the box in front of his face, finally annoyed that he would wake up; she leaned in next to his ear, and yelled as loud as she could.

"Wake up!"

He sat up abruptly, covering his ears with the pillow, and cursing loudly.

"Jesus Bones! What the hell was that for?"

She smiled with satisfaction, sitting back down on her heels. "Good, finally you're awake."

He sighed, shaking his head at her. "Sometimes I could just…."

She grinned mischievously. "Kiss me?"

"I was actually thinking of something a little more violent, but that will work I guess."

"I brought you pancakes, are you still mad?"

His eyes widened. "How the hell did you get pancakes?"

She tucked her hair behind her ears. "Parker and I went out while you were sleeping."

"Where are they?"

She waved the box in front of his face, and then pulled it away when he tried to grab it.

"Hey!"

"Aren't you going to apologize for yelling at me?"

"Why would I apologize, you're the one who screamed in my ear?"

She shrugged her shoulders, "Fine I guess you don't get any pancakes then."

She tried to slide off of the bed, but Booth wrapped an arm around her waste, pulling her close to him. She giggled, as he turned her to face him crashing his lips to hers in a fierce kiss for a man who had just been asleep minutes before.

She smiled widely, liking being so close to him.

"What was that for?"

"Pancakes."

She leaned over so she was on top of him, leaning in and kissing him again, his arms rested on her waste.

"Forget the pancakes," She grinned, "Parker's watching cartoons."

He grinned widely, turning over, so his body was suspended inches above hers. He crashed his lips against hers, her hands tangled around his neck.

"Pancakes can definitely wait."

She laughed. Maybe like Booth said it was the simple things in life…and for her pancakes and Booth definitely topped the list.

March 2011

Brennan looked down at her watch for what seemed like the millionth time. To her disappointment it hadn't changed since she looked at it 30 seconds ago.

She looked towards the door again, willing him to appear, the little bells jingling over his head. He was supposed to meet her over 20 minutes ago. She knew this was a bad idea.

A horrible idea. What had she been thinking? She couldn't do this. It was too hard. What was she supposed to say to him, I still love you, they're your children? She couldn't. They weren't his. He was their sperm donor and nothing else.

She looked over at Chloe and Sam who were intently drawing in the kid's menu's they had been given. She smiled, they reminded her so much of how Parker used to love to draw in his coloring books.

Even if Booth hadn't been their father for 3 years, she knew he could be. They were just like him. He would make a great father; she already knew that he was a great father to Parker. They deserved to have their father. Sam and Chloe didn't deserve for Brennan to keep him from them. But she couldn't let him.

What if he would have been a better father to them? I try so hard, but I always feel like I'm not doing a good enough job. That he would do better.

"Mommy! Can we order, we're hungwy."

Brennan smiled down at Chloe, who was looking particularly like Booth today. Her huge brown eyes sparkled underneath the lights of the diner.

"Sure babe, what do you want?"

Chloe nudged her brother who looked up from his drawing. "Sammy what do you want to order?"

"Dinoswaurs!"

"You had dinosaurs on Friday night."

"I know, but I like them mommy."

She smoothed down Sam's hair, and smiled at him. "If you want dinosaurs, you can have them."

"Well I want a milkswake mommy."

"You can have whatever you want Chlo."

Chloe was just about to respond, when they both turned facing the doorway, grinning widely.

"Look mommy, its Boof!"

Brennan felt the heat rise in her face, as she turned to look at Booth entering through the door of the diner. It sounded stupid, but at that moment she wished she had the power of invisibility.

Their eyes connected and Brennan looked down immediately as he approached, Parker following closely behind.

"Hey Bones."

"You're late."

"I know, I'm sorry there was tons of traffic."

"Hi Boof!"

"Hi Chloe, Sam, what are you drawing?"

"Dinosaurs!"

Chloe and Sam beamed widely at Booth, and Brennan almost felt sick to her stomach. They three of them were so ignorant to the fact that they were so closely related.

She turned her attention on Parker, not able to look at Booth for too long without a rise of emotions filling her chest.

"Hi Parker."

He smiled shyly, obviously confused by Sam and Chloe. "Hi Dr. Bones."

"Parker you haven't met my twins, Chloe and Sam. Chlo, Sammy, this is Parker."

Chloe and Sam directed their attention off of Booth, and extended their hands to Parker. Parker shook them gingerly, smiling widely.

"Hi Pawker, I'm Chloe. This is Sammy."

Brennan swallowed, realizing that they were indeed blood related to Parker. He was their half-brother. Great another thing to feel guilty about, keeping them away from their brother.

"I know my own name Chloe, I wanna say it."

Chloe stuck out her tongue at Sam, and the three of them started laughing over something that Parker had said, leaving the silence between Brennan and Booth even worse then ever.

"So…"

She looked down, twisting her fingers around the paper napkin on the table. She looked up at him, their eyes meeting.

"Booth, I don't think I can do this."

"What?"

"This… you and me."

"I'm not asking you to go back to us Bones. I just can't…"

He looked into her eyes, and he almost felt comforted by the way she was staring at him. So intensely that he could almost feel her eyes boring into him. They way she used to look at him.

"Can't what?"

He sighed, swiping a hand over his face, before facing her again.

"I can't stand being around you when it's like this. I need things to be ok between us. You can't stay angry at me forever."

She wanted to forgive him; she wanted to let it be ok. She wanted to let him hug her, and she wanted most of all, to tell him the truth. How she felt when he left. Who Chloe and Sam really belonged to.

But she couldn't.

"As much as you want things to be ok Booth, they're not. You can pretend that they are, and so can I. You told me that you cared about me, but I'm not and on off switch. You didn't care about me for 3 and a half years, and now you do again. I can't do that."

"That's not true. Every day I was away you were on my mind, I never stopped caring."

"Don't do this Booth. I don't want to talk about it with you."

"You act like you're the only one that lost something Temperance, but I lost you."

"You can't loose something that you didn't have Booth."

Booth jaw clenched tightly, and Brennan regretted her last words.

"I will let you push me away Temperance, and I'll let you pretend as much as you want, but don't pretend that our relationship didn't mean something, because it did. To both of us."

She blinked back the hot tears that were stinging her eyes. Why was she crying? She couldn't let him see her cry.

"I know it meant something Booth. It's easier if it didn't. I'll start over, but I can't go back."

He smiled at her, and she smiled weakly back, wiping her eyes quickly.

"Forward it is then Bones. Forward it is."

"Ok."

"Ok."

They looked down at their menus, and Brennan shielded her eyes from Booth, wishing that she didn't have to cry. She had already let him in, and with Booth anything was too much, but it felt so nice, she didn't have the rationality to push him away.


	11. Hot Nights and Rainy Mornings

**I'm so glad you guys like the story so much, but the updates may take a little longer from now on, since this is where i am a up to date in writing the story, so it may be a little less fre quent like every few days, ok keep reading to see what happens next, and thanks so much for your great feedback :)**

Brennan didn't usually acknowledge summers. The seasons didn't change in the cool serenity of the air conditioned lab. It was a like a perfect paradise of temperature controlled bliss.

She didn't know what people meant when they said that DC turned into the 7th circle of he11 during those final weeks of August. Why they would walk around with giant sunglasses perched upon their heads, and a light sheen of sweat coating their bodies.

When she left the lab at night, the sun would always be down, leaving the city in a dusky haze, a light breeze sweeping the city. That was the only DC summer she knew.

Now she knew.

She didn't know how hot it was, but it literally felt like a million degrees. She let out a frustrated sigh, as she fanned her face with her hand. The air was so damp and suffocating that she felt like she couldn't breath. Even if it wasn't raining yet, she felt like she had been completely drenched, and she could tell the sky was brewing with thoughts of precipitation, because of the dark stormy blue color the clouds were.

She leaned back against Booth, whose arms were wrapped lightly around her waist, his fingers were cool against her burning skin, and she smiled as he lightly kissed the top of her head.

"Booth…."

"Are you whining Bones, that's not like you."

"I'm not whining…it's just, why are we here? Its so god damned hot."

"We are here because its something you do Bones, listen to outdoor concerts in the summer. Plus, we can't all live in a temperature controlled museum all the time."

Brennan shut her eyes, hoping maybe if she imagined she was in the Artic somewhere, then she would really be teleported there. No luck. She did smile though, listening to the band playing on the raised stage over looking the park.

There were about a hundred couples sprawled out over the lawn, some with little kids who were squirming around looking for something more interesting to do, others alone, looking a lot more content with each other, then Brennan was feeling in the intense humid heat.

"Hey, I don't live at the lab. I live in my apartment."

She emphasized the word live twice, just so Booth would get the point. She didn't like the implication that she didn't have a life outside of the lab, and it was obvious that was what he was getting at. She had a life.

She had him.

"I know you live in your apartment Babe, all though I prefer when you stay with me."

She smiled, leaning up to kiss him softly. He had adopted a new nickname for her in the few brief months that they were together. At first she had objected, saying that he was objectifying her, but she learned to like it.

"Me too."

They sat for a while, watching the band play quietly as the clouds brewed over head. They were perched on top of the hill, so they had a clear view of all of the couples lying on the lawn below them. It was nice to be away from the crowds, just be able to listen to the music and be together, without being smushed together making it even hotter then it already was.

The band slowed their pace as it became later in the concert, and Booth suddenly grabbed Brennan's hand, pulling her up to stand next to him.

She looked up at him confused.

"What are you doing?"

"Do you want to dance with me Bones?"

She smiled, "There's no dance floor."

"Just go with it Bones, stop being so logical."

She scoffed, but he could see she was smiling.

"Fine, but I'm not a very good dancer."

He grinned at her, sliding his arms around her waist, drawing her closer to him, while she wrapped her arms around his neck, leaning her face into his chest, enjoying being close to him.

They didn't dance so much as just move slowly to the music, entwined in each other. Booth nostrils were immediately filled with her smell, the lavender shampoo she used, mixed with the Coppertone SPF 45 that she had coated herself with. The sun block made him think of summer.

This had been their summer. The first summer they had been together, and he wasn't going to deny that it could have possibly been the best summer of his life. Just he and Bones and Parker. Or Parker sometimes.

The second side of her was the one that he loved even more than he knew. The side that would lie in bed with him for hours, and kiss him to wake him up. The side that hugged Parker, and brought him milkshakes and pancakes when he wanted them. The side that he could drag out to the real world, even with her protests and logical arguments.

He thought he had loved her before, but he hadn't even known her.

He knew her now, because it had been their summer. He didn't want it to end, and he certainly didn't want to forget it.

Tilting her chin so her eyes were staring up at him, he leaned down letting his lips brush her softly.

"Bones, I--,"

He was stopped by the sudden clap of thunder that seemed to split the world apart, quickly followed by bright flashes of lighting lighting up the dark sky. Shrieks from the concert goers were heard, as people scattered, the rain following predictably after the lighting.

It was soft at first, and then it was pounding down on their faces, soaking their clothes and their skin. It was warm summer rain, warm like the air around it. Brennan slipped out of his grasp, smiling, her dark hair plastered across her wet bare shoulders, the rain soaking her luminescent skin.

"We're going to get wet Booth."

He smiled, pulling her close to him, whispering huskily in her ear. "We already are."

She smiled as he slid his hands around her waist, pulling her lips roughly to him, the rain pounding down hard on their faces, as he closed his eyes, tasting her only her lips, and the warm rain that was pooling on them quickly.

His fingers drew circles on the soft skin of her back, her wet tank top clinging temptingly to her skin. She pulled away, smiling, looking up at the turbulent sky, catching the water with her tongue.

He slid his hands around her waist, pulling her lips roughly to him, the rain pounding down hard on their faces, as he closed his eyes, tasting her only her lips, and the warm rain that was pooling on them quickly.

His fingers drew circles on the soft skin of her back, her wet t-shirt clinging temptingly to her skin. She pulled away, smiling, looking up at the turbulent sky, catching the water with her tongue.

He couldn't help but notice the comparison between her dark eyes, and the stormy clouds above. There was always something brewing in her eyes, just like the rain brewed in the clouds before finally finding its release.

Drawing her close to him, his lips found hers again.

There was nothing like kissing in the rain.

March 27, 2011

It was a sad day when you felt like your 3 year old twins were acting more mature then you were. Brennan wanted to slap herself around the head.

She stared gloomily into her giant chocolate milkshake, and then across the table where Booth was chatting to the twins amicably. He appeared to be saying something hilarious because both Sam and Chloe were giggling hysterically, and she could see that their milkshakes were almost spurting out their noses, something that would not be very pretty to watch.

Booth caught her eyes, and he smiled. She smiled weakly back at him, wishing that she hadn't agreed to do this. It was too hard. She didn't know what to say to him, how to act.

After everything that they had been through. Everything that they had had, it made her physically sick to pretend like she didn't care. Like she didn't remember every second that they had been together. How she had felt being with him. Like she was finally free.

Most of all, it hurt the most to pretend like it hadn't been like a bullet to the heart when he left. To act like her heart hadn't broken when he left.

It was still broken.

She hated putting on a façade, and bringing Chloe and Sam, meant she had to. She wasn't going to put them in the same room with her, when she was so angry at Booth. So completely and irreversibly broken by him.

Parker turned his attention from the giant cheeseburger he was in the process of devouring, and onto Brennan.

"How's your milkshake Dr. Bones?"

She grinned, taking a sip. She couldn't be mad at Parker. He hadn't left her on purpose. He had been 5. He didn't have a choice.

Booth had a choice. He didn't choose you.

The thought was painful, but she knew it was true. That was why it was so hard to let him back in. He hadn't chosen her; he had turned his back on her, like everyone had. Like he promised not to.

"Its good Parker thanks."

Parker took a bite of his hamburger, and mumbled something that Brennan couldn't understand.

She laughed lightly. "What did you say?"

Parker swallowed and smiled at her. She wanted to look away; he looked so much like Booth it hurt.

"I said, that I'm glad you still like chocolate milkshakes Dr. Bones…I was afraid that you would be different."

"Sweetie, just because you were gone doesn't mean that I changed."

Chloe and Sam were now diligently coloring in the mazes on their kids menus, after listening to Booth tell them a joke about dinosaurs. They had long since finished their chicken dinosaurs, and Booth had had a fun time talking to them.

They were so much like Brennan, it was hard to believe. Chloe especially, she was just as single-minded, opinionated, and bossy as her mom.

Now that they had drawn their attention back to their coloring books, Booth couldn't help but catch the snippet of Brennan and Parker's conversation.

Parker looked down anxiously and then back at Brennan, his brown eyes huge.

"But Dr. Bones, things have changed. You have your own kids."

"That doesn't mean that you're not important to me Parker. I promise."

"But you and Daddy…you're not his person anymore."

"I don't know what that means."

"You're angry at Daddy."

Brennan looked over at Booth, who seemed to be listening to she and Parker's conversation. She had forgotten that they weren't exactly far away from each other, and now she didn't know what to say.

"Parker, I…"

"Why? Why do you have to be angry at him! Why can't things just go back the way they were!?"

Brennan could see that Parker was angry with her. She didn't want that. She hadn't even thought that her anger with Booth could be visible to Parker. He was 9 years old now, not 4.

It wasn't her fault. Booth was the one who had left. She didn't deserve for Parker to be angry at her. Why couldn't anyone ever be angry at Booth? They were always telling her to forgive him. To let it go. She couldn't let it go.

"Its not that easy Parker. People have to move on."

Brennan hated herself at that moment for being so logical. To a 9 year old, it probably just sounded like she was lying. He looked up at her, his eyes welling with tears.

Brennan had never felt worse. She looked over at Booth, who was looking, his brown eyes conveying the exact same emotion that his son's were. Hurt.

Why is everyone looking at me like that? I didn't leave. I didn't abandon them. They left me.

"I don't want them to. Why can't you just love him still? Please?"

Brennan didn't know how to respond. She was about to open her mouth, when Sam saved her. He tugged on her shirt anxiously, and she turned to look at him, temporarily forgetting about the Booth boys staring at her expectantly from across the table.

"Mommy!"

"What Sammy?"

"Chloe feels sick."

Brennan leaned over to see Chloe, looking paler then she usually did, a pained look on her pretty little face. Brennan ran a hand over Chloe's forehead. She felt warm. That was just what she needed, one of them getting the flu. It would be days before Sam got sick, and then only probably a matter of hours before she contracted whatever they had.

"Chlo, sweetie, do you feel alright?"

"My tummy hurwts mommy."

Brennan bit her lip, she felt like if there really was a god, that he had just saved her from a very ugly confrontation, which she was definitely not ready for.

Booth was looking quite concerned on the other side of the table. She hated him for that. That he was clicking so well with Sam and Chloe. Of course he would. He was their father. It was an anthropological inevitability.

"We should go."

"Yeah I understand, Bones, she doesn't look good."

Brennan managed to smile, as she stood up, pulling 20 dollars out of her back pocket, and simultaneously lifting Chloe out of her chair, holding the little girl tightly in her arms.

"I'm sorry Booth, for leaving like this."

"Its fine Bones don't worry about it. And don't worry about paying."

She dropped the money on the table, "No, I'll pay half," She couldn't stop the last words from tumbling out of her mouth. "Like we used to."

He smiled, "Ok."

Brennan reached down ruffling Parker's hair, "Bye Parker. Listen come and see me at the lab? We could get pancakes?"

Parker nodded, smiling weakly at the young scientist.

Brennan grabbed Sam's hand, as he skipped quickly behind them.

"Bye Boof!"

Booth grinned at Sam, waving. "By Sam, I hope you feel better Chloe."

The little girl didn't respond, as she was already asleep on her mom's shoulder, her dark hair covering half her face like Brennan's always did, no matter how many times she pushed it behind her ears.

Brennan smiled quickly at Booth before she turned, opening the door, letting the sound of the pouring rain fill the diner.

Booth stood up, decided that he needed to say something to Brennan.

"Daddy, where are you going?"

"I'll be right back buddy; I just have to say something to Bones."

Parker nodded, sitting back down in his chair, sipping his milkshake.

Booth opened the door, catching Brennan right before she stepped out from under the awning into the rain.

He grabbed her arm, and she whirled around, confusion plain on her face, as she was still holding Chloe who was fast asleep, Sam leaning against her side in exhaustion.

"What are you doing Booth?"

"Listen Bones, I just wanted to say, thank you for doing this. For meeting with me. I know how hard it is for you. It means a lot to Parker. It means a lot to me."

I did it for you Booth. Because I can't say no to you.

She looked out into the rain; her eyes clear as glass as he could tell she was thinking. She turned back to him, biting her lip softly.

"You don't know, but you're welcome Booth. It's for Parker."

Booth could see right through her lie, but he didn't call her on it. If that's what she wanted he would let her get away with it.

"So I'll see you at work."

She nodded. "See you at work."

Booth watched as she ran to her car through the rain, Sam trailing quickly behind her, while Chloe slept in her arms. It had been so unimaginable that she could have had kids, but now almost 4 years later, it seemed like anything could happen.

**Hit the button...it makes me happy:)**


	12. What's a Synonym for Awkward

September 2007

Brennan coughed; the dust from the road filling her throat and lungs, the heat was giving her a headache. She covered her eyes, squinting, the sun glaring horribly in her direction.

The wind was blowing warmly, whipping her hair around her shoulders, and making little mini dust tornadoes across the side of the road. Fortunately, she had the shade of a giant pine tree to comfort the sweltering heat that the 12 o'clock sun was bringing down on her.

Of course this had to happen today. The day with record breaking September temperatures. When she had already been in a horrible mood and probably not very fun to be spending time with, they had to crash.

She knew it was probably partly her fault. She had snapped at Booth all morning during the case, finally culminated in a screaming match in the car. So logically it wasn't really her fault, he was the one with the hands on the wheel, but she had probably provoked him to the point where he wasn't really looking at the road anymore.

Luckily there hadn't been any other cars around, which wasn't exactly lucky anymore since they had been stranded in the middle of Nowhere, Virginia, in the middle of some random state park that she hadn't paid attention to the name of at all while they were driving. She was too busy trying to ignore Booth.

She had just woken up upset. She wasn't usually moody, she could handle her emotions, but today something just felt off. She couldn't place it, and she certainly couldn't talk to Booth about it, but in the back of her mind she knew it wasn't fair to take it out on him.

He's only trying to be there for me. I don't want to push him away, today I just feel…wrong.

She reminded herself not to get in arguments during a particularly windy road. Advantageously, neither of them had seriously gotten hurt; the only one who had taken the most of the damage was the tree they had crashed into, and the hood of Booth's car which was severely dented. Brennan felt bad about that.

Glancing over at Booth, who was leaned over the hood of the car, his sleeves rolled up to his elbows, sweat coating his face lightly, and grease smeared over his toned forearms. He was frowning frustratingly at the engine, which seemed to be not wanting to cooperate with his pleas to have it start working again.

"Is it working?"

"Don't you think that if it was working we would have been out of here by now?"

She turned away, knowing that she deserved that. She had been a btch to him all morning, caused him to crash his car, and now they were stuck in God knows where with NO cell phone service.

Walking slowly towards him, she leaned against the side of the car, trying to think of the words. Maybe she should just go with simple.

"Booth."

He looked up at her, wiping the sweat off his face with his forearm. "Listen Bones, if you're going to lecture me about the rules of the road, or some bullsht like that, I'm really not in the mood to hear it."

"No…I'm sorry Booth."

He looked up at her again, this time his eyes were kinder. Booth knew that she had a hard time apologizing, so she must really mean it if she was saying it now.

"Listen Bones, it wasn't your fault that we crashed."

"No not for that. You were driving after all. I'm sorry that I was so horrible to you today. I didn't mean it."

Brennan now had his full attention he moved from his spot next to the open hood, and next to her, leaning close to her, their bodies almost touching.

"Is something wrong Babe, I mean we argue, but today you were really on my case. Is something bothering you?"

She looked down, and then back up at him. "No…I mean, I don't think so. I just woke up today, and something felt off Booth. I don't know what it is, but I shouldn't have taken it out on you."

He reached a finger tilting her chin up to face him. She looked up at him, and he could tell that she was visibly upset; her usually clear blue eyes were cloudy.

If only I hadn't let her get to me, and actually paid attention to why she was snapping maybe I could have seen what's wrong.

"Is it something I did Bones? Are we going too fast?"

She shook her head, chewing on her lip. She hadn't ever been good at tapping into her own emotions, and today was no different, but she definitely knew she didn't want things with Booth to change.

"No, no. It's not that. It's not about you. I'm just not having a good day I guess."

"We all have those days Babe, it will pass."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah I'm sure, I'm just glad you're ok." He grinned at her, and she smiled back.

"Me too."

"Honestly Bones, I thought you were going to break up with me."

"No!" It came out a lot louder and more forcefully then she intended, but at least he looked up at her.

"No, I don't want to break up with you. When I'm with you Booth, I…I just, I don't know what it is. Its different then anything else I've ever felt…"

He cupped her face in both of his hands, smiling at her, leaning down and kissing her softly.

"I love you too Bones."

She smiled, leaning up and kissing him, and then wrapping her arms around him tightly, snuggling her face into his shoulder, as his arms snaked around her small body, pulling her closer to him, knowing that what she meant by the small gesture.

I love you too Booth.

March 31, 2011

Booth hated traffic. He absolutely despised it. It stopped him from getting where he was going. It slowed things down. It was the reason murderers got away, and Parker was alone in the parking lot when he picked him up from school.

The main reason he was loathing the traffic that he had been stuck in for about twenty minutes now, was the women who was sitting next to him, looking like she would rather be anywhere else.

"Bones."

She turned to look at him expectantly, her eyes shining.

"What?"

"Nothing, I was just trying to make conversation."

She looked down, and then out the window into the rain that was causing most of the traffic.

"Oh. I'm not very good at that."

"I know."

She pursed her lips, sighing loudly, wishing that she had the power to teleport out of the car. The tension in the car was so thick, she felt like she was drowning. Every movement was watched. Every glance that they shared, she remembered. She wanted it back, but there was no going back.

Booth tapped his fingers on the steering wheel, turning on the radio, and immediately regretting it. The soothing sound of Ben E. King's "Stand By Me" flooded the large SUV.

It had been their "song". Booth remembered with a bittersweet fondness explaining to Brennan the significance of having a "song". She hadn't understood at first, but slowly she had warmed to the idea. He remembered dancing to it one night when it came on the radio in his apartment.

She blushed turning away to make sure he didn't see. Quickly he clicked off the song, the unforgiving silence again filling their minds.

"So how are the twins?"

"Fine."

"Is Chloe feeling better?"

"She had the stomach flu, but she's better."

Why is he asking me this? Why does he have to act like they're his kids when he doesn't even know that they are.

Booth smiled, thinking about the little girl falling asleep in Brennan's arms. He hadn't seen the little 3 year olds since Sunday, because Brennan hadn't been at work on Monday, and they went to preschool all day. He liked them; they reminded him so much of the Bones he used to know. The one who let him in. There was something about them though, that he couldn't put his finger on.

"I'm glad."

"Yeah."

"Bones, come on. Please try and engage, just a little bit."

"I don't want to talk about Sam and Chloe."

"Why?"

"I just don't, so can you just drop it Booth!?"

He put his hands up in surrender. They weren't really needed on the wheel since the car wasn't even moving.

"Fine, we won't talk about them. I just thought that you'd want to, I mean they're your kids---,"

"I know that." They're yours too.

Booth looked out the window. He knew she wasn't exactly warm to him lately, but it was weird she didn't want to talk about Chloe and Sam. He hadn't been able to stop babbling about Parker for years, he still couldn't. But it was Bones, who knew what logic was whirling around in her head at this moment.

"So…this weather…its' rainy."

She looked over at him like he was a complete idiot. That hadn't exactly been an observation of rocket science proportions. It's rainy. Wow.

"Yes."

Maybe I should have kept the radio on.

"And we're stuck in traffic."

She nodded. "Yes."

Booth sighed, deciding that conversation at this point was hopeless.

Lying sucks. I don't want to do it anymore, but……I have to. Right?


	13. Don't Ask Don't Tell

End of August, 2007

Booth checked his watch anxiously, tapping on the table of the coffee shop as he watched the people walk by on the crowded streets of DC. The sun was setting quickly, and Booth knew that he was going to be late for Bones. They were supposed to be seeing a movie in…he checked his watch again…20 minutes. That was so not happening.

Just as he was pulling his cell phone out of his pocket to give Brennan a call saying they should see the later show, the women he had been waiting for walked through the door.

Her blonde hair was tied up in a messy bun, her blue eyes shining, her face radiant with pregnancy. An uncharacteristic grin was wide across her pretty face when she saw him, waving as she crossed the café to sit down next to him.

He waved casually, and smiled, taking a sip of his coffee as she sat down next to across from him.

"Hi Seeley."

"Rebecca, you're late. I was supposed to meet Bones 5 minutes ago."

She quickly ordered a coffee, and then looked at Booth, her face guilty. "I know, I'm sorry. Parker had to go to a friend's house and we got lost. Anyways, this won't take long."

He took a sip of his coffee, looking at his ex-girlfriend and mother of his child with inquisitive eyes.

"So what's up Rebecca, you don't exactly make social dates with me very often, so something must be going on. Is Parker all right?"

She wavered under his stare. She never had been able to match his stares with one of her own. That was what he loved about Bones, she was never afraid to challenge him.

Speaking of Bones, she is going to kill me for being so late. I'll make it up to her.

"No, no. Parker's fine."

"So what is it? I'm really going to be late."

"Hold your horses Seeley; I'm sure Dr. Brennan will forgive you. What I'm about to say is important."

Booth sighed, running a hand over his face. "Ok, shoot."

"I'm moving to New York."

Booth literally almost spat his coffee across the table, instead he satisfied himself with burning the back of his throat with the scalding coffee.

"What?!"

She looked at him calmly. "I'm moving to New York Seeley. With Parker and Drew. In 3 weeks."

"Why?"

"I want the baby to have a new life Seeley." She put a hand protectively on her middle. "There's too much in DC. Too much baggage. Drew and I just want to start over."

"With Parker too?"

"Yes, Parker is my son after all."

"He's my son too Rebecca. You can't just take him away from me."

"I'm not trying to take him away from you. That's why I'm giving you notice. You can move to New York too Booth."

"I can't just move to New York Rebecca. My whole life is here. The bureau, and the squints, and Bones…"

"Listen I'm not responsible for what you do Seeley, but I'm taking Parker with me. He can visit you on weekends if you decide not to move."

"Parker's life is here too Rebecca, what if he doesn't want to move."

"He's 5 Seeley; do you honestly think he knows what he wants?"

Booth sighed, looking out the window, trying to gather his thoughts. This was all just happening too damn fast.

"Don't you think this is a little sudden Rebecca? Maybe you should wait until the baby is born before you make a decision like this."

"No, you can't change my mind Seeley. I'm doing this for the baby, and my family. If you decide you want to move, give me a call."

She stood up abruptly, leaving money on the table for the coffee, as she walked out the door as fast as she had come leaving Booth to think about the bomb that had just been dropped on his life.

He took a sip of his coffee, looking out onto the streets were a dark haze was setting over the city. He needed time to just think.

Picking up his cell phone, he hit her speed dial, rubbing his forehead.

"Yeah Bones, I'm definitely going to be late…."

April 1, 2007

Brennan pulled her hair behind her ears, sighing loudly as she stared blankly at her computer screen. She was supposed to be writing part of her next book. She was supposed to be identifying the Civil War remains that were waiting for her only 30 feet away on the lab platform. She should be going over the case file that Booth had just dropped off in her office 5 minutes away. Instead her head was overflowing with thoughts she truly wished weren't there.

Booth. Babies. Chloe. Sam. Her lies. Booth again. Things had been horrible with him. She didn't want it to be that way. She wished that she could go back in time and stop him from leaving. That she hadn't been so afraid and had gone to New York the second she realized she was pregnant.

She bit her lip, thinking about his sudden departure. The memories which had been slowly repeating themselves on a continuous rotation since he came back made her feel sick. If only things hadn't changed so suddenly.

They would have been together right now. He would have helped her with Chloe and Sam. They would have had a father. They would have been a family, and everything that Brennan was so afraid of wouldn't have to exist anymore. Because she would have Booth.

She couldn't change the past. It wasn't logical, but she could change the future. She shouldn't have lied to him. He needed to know the truth. She knew that Chloe and Sam needed their father more then ever.

If only she wasn't such a coward and could think of a way to tell him.

Little did she know, a way would present its self in a very unexpected format.

She leaned her head in her hands, trying to calm herself down. She was just going to stand to find the remains, knowing that the bones might clear her head, when the raven-haired head of Angela Montenegro popped into her door.

"Hey sweetie."

Brennan put up a weak smile for her friends benefit, as Angela meandered across her office, finally sitting on the side of her friend's desks, staring at her with huge almond eyes.

"Hey Ange."

"How are things going?"

"With what?"

"You know, a certain FBI agent?" Angela raised her eyebrows.

"With Booth?"

"Yes, sweetie. With Booth. How's he taking the news?"

"What news?"

"You know the whole you having his illegitimate kids, lying to him thing?" Angela used her hands to weigh out the news to Brennan, and Brennan immediately turned away from Angela. She didn't want to lie to her best friend.

"I haven't told him."

Angela stood up, a look of shock and disappointment on her pretty face.

"What?! Brennan! You haven't told him?!"

Brennan stood up, walking around her desk to face her friend, who was definitely not reacting the way she hoped she would.

"I couldn't Angela."

"You couldn't? You couldn't Brennan? How do you think he would feel if he knew you were hiding his children from him? Not very happy I would guess."

Brennan looked at her friend, whose voice was rising. She knew Angela would be disappointed in her, but she couldn't explain.

"Ange I tried. Really, but I couldn't."

Angela put up her hand to her friend, he face hard with recognition.

"Stop it Brennan. You know I'm disappointed in you. Sam and Chloe deserve their father. They deserve to have what you didn't. And I would have thought that you would want them to have that. They need their father. They need Booth!"

If everyone in the Jeffersonian didn't already guess that Booth was their father, they would now, because Angela's voice had rung out loudly, leaving Brennan to wince. Angela had been completely honest, something that Brennan hadn't been able to achieve in the past week.

Angela's face quickly turned from anger to shock, as she put a hand to her mouth, going white at something behind Brennan's back.

Brennan looked at her friend, confused. "Ange, what it is…"

She trailed off as she turned around, knowing exactly why Angela looked so panicked. Standing in Brennan's doorway, with a look of utter shock on his face was Booth.

Brennan's eyes widened, as the comprehension that he had heard their entire conversation ran through her head. She felt her heart beating loudly, as she gripped the desk for support.

Apparently and opportunity had presented itself. There was no going back.


	14. Eyes Like the Storm

**No flashback on this one, but I thought that this was intense enough :) Review please, thanks!**

Booth stared at Brennan, no words coming to his head to describe how he felt. She looked so scared. So completely terrified. He had done that to her. Brennan never used to be scared. She was the strongest person he knew.

He had done this too. She had lied. Lied about something so important, something so…so live changing. The fact that he had two children, who he knew nothing about, was something he would have preferred to know a little sooner. And judging by the look on her face, she hadn't been planning on telling him anytime soon.

It was just un-comprehendible that she could do something like that. No wonder she had been so awkward talking about them yesterday. He finally understood her behavior these past few weeks. How she had tried to push him away as far as she could. How she hadn't let him get close, or opened up at all. She had been cold and distant and he knew why.

How could she have done this? The impact that his departure must have had on her finally hit him. He hadn't realized it at first, but he finally understood. She had been so devastated, that she would hide his own children from him. She must have had to go threw all of this alone.

He didn't know how to feel. Angry. Hurt. Confused. Everything was coming into his head at once, and he didn't know how to react. Instead he just stared at her, their eyes meeting, and he knew it was true.

"What did she say?"

"Booth I---,"

"No. What did she say Bones. Do not lie to me; I swear I will burn this lab down."

Brennan bit her lip the way she always did when she was nervous, she saw out of the corner of her eye Angela creeping out of the office, and she wished so much she could strangle her best friend for having such a big mouth.

What am I supposed to say? Oh yeah they're your kids Booth, it just slipped my mind.

"They're yours."

Brennan felt almost nauseous, and she knew she had to get out of there. Booth was not going to let this go with a simple "they're yours". She knew him better then that, but if she could just make it out the 40 feet through the lab and out the doors to her car which she had stupidly parked in the rain, she would be safe.

Booth didn't know what to say, the impact of the blow was too overwhelming. He had 2 kids. With Brennan.

Brennan took Booth's shock as an excuse to run out of her office. She pushed passed him quickly, her head down not wanting to look at him. He barely noticed her leaving, the shock still setting in.

She was almost there, almost past the automatic doors, when Booth came to his senses realizing that she had run away. He wasn't letting her go. Not when there was so much to say.

"Bones! Do not walk away from me."

_Crap._

He sprinted across the lab, through the doors, and out of the Jeffersonian where Brennan was almost to her car, her body already soaked from the heavy rain. Booth didn't care if he got wet; he stepped into the rain, grabbing her arm, spinning her to face him.

"What?!"

"What?! What?! I think we oughta talk about the fact that you've been hiding my children from me for 3 and half years Bones."

Even with the rain pounding hard on her face, he could see the tears building in her eyes and spilling out, mixing with the rain.

"They're mine Booth. They're not yours. You can say that as much as you want. But you're nothing but their sperm donor. You weren't there when I spent months moody and pregnant and alone! You weren't there when I was sick every morning because I was pregnant. You weren't there when Sam and Chloe said their first words, or when they used to race each other around the house while I had to chase them to make sure they didn't crack open their heads. And you definitely weren't there, every single night when they asked where their father was….and I had to tell them that he would be back soon, while my heart was breaking knowing that they grow up knowing that you abandoned them. All you are…is the man that left them."

She was sobbing now, the tears viciously running down her face, her hair plastered to her shoulders.

Booth's voice rose. "I would have been there Temperance! You think that I wanted to miss out on having children with you?! Miss out on their lives? You lied to me. You kept them hidden from me knowing that I wouldn't press you on the subject. I would never, NEVER intentionally leave my children, and you know that."

Their eyes met, and for a second, it felt like how it had been. Her eyes were the color of the clouds above, the rain matching them exactly. And then a clap of thunder pulled him out of the past and into the future.

"Don't do that! Do not make me the bad guy in this Booth! You left me. Do you understand that?" She said it slower, he voice dripping with pain. "You. Left. Me. I tried to go to your apartment. I knocked on the door until I realized no one was coming when your neighbor came to let me in! I sat on the floor of your apartment reading your stupid letter over and over again trying to figure out what the hell you meant by it. I tried calling you, and all of your numbers changed. I figured you wanted to kick me out of your life and you knew exactly how to do it."

Booth opened his mouth to speak, when Brennan stopped him. "And how the hell would I know you wouldn't leave your children. Because…" Her voice broke, and she covered her mouth, the emotion rising in her throat. She shut her eyes tightly before continuing.

"Because, you had no problem in the world, with leaving me."

"Is that what you think? That I didn't feel anything when I left? That I didn't spend every single night I was away thinking of you? I was in love with you Bones. You're my partner. We spent every single minute of everyday together, and then it was just over."

She shook her head, trying to wipe away the tears, although it didn't do much good as she was completely soaked to the bone with rain water.

"You broke my heart Booth. I loved you. I let you in. I trusted you not to let me down. Remember when we first got together, you promised me that you wouldn't leave me. You pinky sweared, and I believed you. I don't trust you anymore Booth."

"If anyone should be having trust issues it would be me! Do you think I'm happy that you lied to me? That I missed out on Chloe and Sam's lives. I'm not."

"You're not getting close to them Booth. I won't let you, because if you think I'll let you hurt those kids half as much as you hurt me, you're wrong."

"You can't keep me from my kids Bones. Let me ask you a question, do they ever ask about me? Do they wonder why I'm not there? Next time you can tell them, because their mother lied to them. That's what you can tell them."

She shivered, sobs shaking her body as his words set in. It wasn't her fault. It wasn't.

"This is not my fault! I was going to tell you. I didn't mean to lie to you. But I didn't know what else to do. When I said I loved you, I meant it. And then you come back here like nothings changed. For you it hasn't, but for me? I've spent the last 3 years still in love with you! And I hate myself for it, but no matter how much I try to forget you, I can't. I can't Booth. And every single time I tell them a story about how you saved me, I have to remember how you rescued me, in every way possible. You rescued me from my life, and I made the stupid mistake to think that you actually cared. You didn't. And you still don't. Because if you cared, you would just let me go."

"I do care. What does it take to show you that I care Temperance? I want to be a part of your life. I want to be a part of Chloe and Sam's. I want everything to just be able to go back to the way it was."

She shook her head, turning away from him, and clicking the keys of her car.

"You can't always get what you want Booth."

She slammed the door of her car, and he watched her pull away, the screeching sound of the wheels against the wet pavement was like nails on a chalk board, as Booth stood in the rain. For the first time, he knew how she must have felt when he left. It was like being left behind.

It was like having his heart ripped out.

It hurt like hell.

**Press the button, you know you wanna :)**


	15. Breaking and Entering

Brennan knocked on the door again fiercely. She had already called to say that she would be coming over, so honestly she was a bit annoyed that she had to be standing outside at 10 pm in the freezing cold while rain poured down. Luckily she was standing warm and dry under the porch, but still.

She should have been shivering, but the combined body heat of two 3 year old twins sleeping peacefully in her arms kept her warm. She wished she was able to just fall asleep that easily. With no care or worries in the world. They were completely oblivious to the pain that was engulfing their young lives at that very minute.

She stumbled slightly as the door opened abruptly. Angela looked like she had just woken up, her hair in loose ponytail which was falling out rapidly, while her jeans were rumpled from sleep.

"Hey sweetie, sorry I fell asleep watching TV with Jack."

"Its ok, can I come in?"

Angela smiled, opening the door wider so her friend could step in. "Of course you can sweetie, you don't have to ask."

Brennan stepped into the welcoming hallway of the house that Angela shared with Hodgins. After they had gotten married, Angela had wanted to start over fresh so that they shared the house instead of her living in space. It felt like both of them, with warm toasty colored walls, and furniture that begged to be sat on.

Brennan looked around, pulling Chloe and Sam farther up into her arms. She bit her lip, and started to speak, but spoke at the same time. They both laughed.

"Go ahead Angela."

"No its fine sweetie, you were first."

Brennan smiled, meeting her friend's eyes. "Ange I want to thank you for doing this. I just…I really need to fix this."

"Bren, you know I would take Chloe and Sam whenever you need me to."

"I know. This sounds stupid, but I'm sort of grateful that Booth found out today. It would have been so much harder for me to tell him on my own."

Angela grinned, shrugging. "Well you can just blame my big mouth for that sweetie. I know I already apologized, but I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have butted into things with you and Booth. It just made it more complicated, and you guys have complicated all on your own."

Brennan had to smirk at that, but her smile quickly turned to seriousness as she thought about what Angela was saying.

"Ange, I just…I don't know if there's a 'Booth and I' anymore. So much has happened, and he says that he wants things to go back the way they are, but I don't know if I'll ever trust him again…or if he'll trust me."

"Sweetie, you did what you thought was right. So did Booth. He moved to New York because he didn't want Parker to think that he abandoned him. He wasn't trying to abandon you in the process. Remember that."

Brennan smiled. "You make it sound so simple."

Angela shook her head, smiling. "Its never simple sweetie."

"I know."

Angela motioned to Sam and Chloe. "And you're not alone anymore Bren. You have 2 other lives to think about."

Brennan looked down at her children, touching their heads as to make sure that they were still there.

"It's a logical anthropological inevitability that I would care about my offspring so much. I never thought I would. I didn't think I would be able to But I do Ange, so much. I don't think I've ever cared so much about someone else before, except…."

"Except Booth."

Brennan looked down, and then back at Angela. "Yeah."

It was silent for a second, while they both thought. It was obvious who they were thinking about. It started with a B.

"Sweetie why don't we get Chloe and Sam to bed; its getting late. I made up the guest bedroom next to ours."

Brennan nodded, following Angela up the stairs, the weight of the twins making her go significantly slower. She wondered how she had ever survived with them inside of her.

Angela clicked on the lights revealing the pretty spring green room with its two twin beds, and big fluffy green pillows. Brennan loved this room, especially in the morning when the sun flooded the room from the huge picture windows.

She carefully lowered Chloe and Sam onto the beds, relieved that they weren't stirring. She lifted the covers over them, tucking them in, as they shifted slightly in their heavy sleep, adjusting to the new change in sleeping environment.

Brennan had told them they were staying at Angela's but she found herself already missing them. Leaning down, she kissed them carefully, smoothing out their hair.

"Goodnight Sammy. Goodnight Chloe. Sleep tight. I'll see you in the morning."

She knew they couldn't hear her, but she figured that it was for good measure. She stood up facing Angela who was smiling warmly at the twin mini me's of Brennan and Booth asleep in her guest room.

Brennan didn't think twice before throwing herself at her friend, hugging her tightly. Angela grinned in surprise hugging Brennan back.

"Thank you Angela, for everything. For being my friend. I don't know what I'd do without you."

"You'd be fine sweetie, you always are."

Brennan smiled as she pulled away comforted by the embrace. "You're right."

"I always am. Now get out of here, we both know where you should be."

Brennan kissed Sam and Chloe quickly again, before dashing down the stairs, into the rain. It had taken her a long time to get where she was going, but hopefully it wasn't to late to arrive.

Brennan touched the cool little key she was clutching so tightly in her fist. The edges pushing into her skin woke her up, and as she released her hand she realized just how tightly she had been holding on to the key.

She fingered it gently, running her fingers over the grooves and channels of the metal, smiling weakly. This key seemed so symbolic. She almost had to laugh. Since when did she find things symbolic?

But this was painfully obvious. She remembered when the little old lady had given her this key. How she had hesitantly clicked it into the lock, knowing what she would see before her.

She looked over her shoulder at the door across the hall wondering if Rose still lived there. It had been 3 and a half years since she had set foot into Booth's building. 3 and a half years since she had stood here, wishing that he would be there when she opened up.

She felt haunted with the memories, as if she couldn't get away from them. All she wanted to do was run.

She had never gone back. After that night she had hidden the key by her bed, underneath pictures of her parents. Underneath the CD's Angela had made her. Underneath Chloe and Sam's birth certificate. She kept it hidden so she wouldn't feel the impulse to go back there.

That's what she had done after he had left. She had hidden anything that would remotely remind her of him. That summer had been filled with him. Because it had been their summer together.

Hundreds of pictures of them which had piled up in frames and on her desk and in her apartment were thrown into a box, shoved underneath her bed. She couldn't look at them. When he'd left she'd been so upset she'd taken the picture of him next to her bedside and smashed it until the shards of glass covered her bedroom floor. She hadn't cared. All she wanted was to be free.

She had switched her shampoo because she knew he loved how it smelled. She had stopped visiting the memorials because of the sunsets that they had watched there. She had washed her sheets and pillows over and over again, trying to get him off of them. Trying to force away the memories of the nights they had shared. It had taken 5 extra-clean cycles until she was finally satisfied.

The only thing she hadn't been able to force out of her life was the diner. She'd go and eat cherry pie there, wishing somehow that it would conjure Booth out of nowhere, but it never did.

So now, she was here. After everything she had tried to erase. After all the things she had promised she wouldn't do, after trying to remove him from her life, she was back here.

She knew he would be asleep. It was 11 o'clock, and she knew Parker never went to bed later then 9. She took a deep breath, closing her eyes for comfort, and slid the key slowly into the small silvery lock.

She exhaled with relief when the door slid open easily. She had been afraid that the locks would have been changed. The apartment was completely bathed in moonlight so that everything had taken on a ghostly appearance.

Even if it was dark, she knew the way around his apartment unless he had moved the furniture to spite her. She slid off her shoes, trying to be quiet so she wouldn't wake up Parker. She knew what she was doing was probably verging on stalkerish, and she was probably invading his privacy, but after almost 4 years without him, she realized that was exactly what she needed. Him.

The apartment wasn't that big, and within seconds she was at his bedroom door. She breathed almost silently for a second, having second thoughts. Maybe she shouldn't be doing this. What if he hurt her again?

I've already broken into his apartment; it would be stupid to stop now. Right?

She turned the knob, wincing when it creaked loudly. Her heart pounded as the moonlit room and sleeping man was revealed. This room. It was like stepping back in time.

Booth immediately heard the door creaking, and the soft footsteps. His army instincts would always be there, and instantaneously his nerves sensed the presence in the room. He shot up in bed, turning to see the striking silhouette he knew so well.

"Bones, what the hell are you doing here?"

She looked down. This had been a bad idea. He was obviously still furious, and she didn't want to scream anymore.

"I'm sorry…I shouldn't have come."

She turned to go, but Booth's voice stopped her. "No…don't go. You scared me that's all."

"I didn't mean to…I just had to talk to you."

She sat on his bed cautiously, making sure to leave enough space between them. Even in the darkness she could see him staring at her curiously.

"How did you get in here? You're not picking locks again are you?"

She laughed softly, thinking about the lock picking tricks Booth had tried to teach her. She hadn't been very good at all.

Brennan lifted key out of her pocket, as Booth's eyes grew wide in surprise. "You kept my key?"

She looked down, maybe he hadn't meant for her to keep it. Maybe it had just been a facilitator to get his letter.

"Was I not supposed to?"

He wanted to reach out and touch her, to comfort her. But he knew he couldn't. They had to fix this first.

"No, no you were. I just didn't think you would."

"I know I shouldn't have done this. Used the key to break into your apartment…I never would have, but I had to apologize."

He could see her eyes shining with fresh tears, the moonlight reflecting off of them. He hated seeing her cry so much.

"No. Bones. I have to say something first."

She nodded, biting her lip softly. "Ok."

"I never knew that my leaving hurt you so much Temperance. I didn't mean it. I would never hurt you intentionally."

What did you expect Booth? I was in love with you, so yes it hurt like hell.

She looked up at him, sadness evident in her eyes. "You did."

"I know. Leaving you….was the hardest thing I've ever done in my life. God, Bones I wish I could take it back. I wish I could take all of it back."

"But you don't really wish that. You would have never left Parker Booth, no matter how much I begged you. We both know that."

She smiled out of irony. "The funniest thing is you say that you regret it. You say you wish you could take it back, but you never once, asked me if I would move with you."

"Bones you know you would have never even considered moving with me. That's why I didn't ask you. You don't think that I didn't want you to move with me. I did."

"You don't know that Booth. You think you know me so well, but you don't."

"You're right. I don't. I would have never pegged you to lie."

She looked away. She didn't want to fight with him. She wanted to fix things.

"Booth I don't want to fight with you again."

He looked at her, and she had a hard time looking back, his gaze was so intense. As if he was reading her soul, and part of her knew he was. Like he always had.

"Me neither."

She ran a hand through her hair, sighing. "Booth, I don't know how to fix this. But I want to. I want to so much. I want Chloe and Sam to have their father. And most of all I don't want to hide from this anymore. I miss you."

She subtly scooted closer to him, a movement that wasn't missed by either of them.

"I would have never left if I knew Temperance. I wouldn't have let you go through that alone. I would have fought for Parker, and for you. And Chloe and Sam."

She let the tears that she had been diligently holding back spill out of her eyes.

"Why couldn't you fight harder? Why did you have to leave me? I was so alone…I needed you…"

Her voice broke with tears, and she turned away from him, covering her face in her hands, her body shaking with sobs she was trying to push down.

Booth reached out, rubbing her shoulder softly. It had been the first physical contact they had had since he was back. She felt the electricity run up her body even through her sobs.

"Hey Bones…please don't cry."

Her next move surprised him more than anything, as she turned collapsing her body into his, and wrapping her arms around him. He was so startled her didn't move for a minute. It had been years since he had held her, and it still felt the same. Some things hadn't changed.

He wrapped his arms around her tightly, stroking her hair softly, her tears falling quickly onto his shirt.

"Bones, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry…"

He held her there, the sobs still wracking her body, until she finally became silent, and her breathing calmed down. Booth could tell she had fallen asleep. They hadn't been like this for so long. Booth was almost afraid that if he fell asleep, he would open his eyes to find that it had all been a dream.


	16. Guilty Pleasures

**This is a little shortie, but I figure you guys would like to read something rather then nothing, so R/R please thanks :)**

Brennan's eyes flashed open as the sun streamed in through the wide windows. Immediately things felt out of place. The windows didn't face her bed in her apartment. Where the hell was she?

Then everything from the previous night came flying back. Their argument in the rain. Letting Angela take Chloe and Sam. Breaking into his apartment. Talking in the moonlight. Crying. She had broken down in his arms as he hugged her, and that was the last thing she remembered. She must have fallen asleep.

That would explain why Booth's arms were wrapped tightly around her body, pulling her close to him. Like he always had. She was snuggled close to him, his body heat keeping her warm. She could hear his soft breathing in her ear. His arm was draped softly across her bare arm, and she knew he had run his knuckles up and down her arm after she fell asleep. He had always done that to get her to calm down. It was one of the things she had missed.

She snuggled in closer to him, shutting her eyes again. What was she doing? Sure they had talked last night, but what did that mean? Should she really be lying in his arms like nothing had happened between them?

_Yes._

Logically she shouldn't. She should run away. But it just felt so…undeniably right. For 3 years she had woken up alone without Booth. He was back, and she wanted to feel like she always did when she was with him. Safe.

He shifted slightly in his sleep, pulling her closer. Booth had always been a deep sleeper, so she doubted that he even noticed she was here.

She didn't doubt that Booth had his fair share of women while he was in New York. He was irresistible, even she couldn't deny it. It made her sick to her stomach even thinking of Booth with someone else.

She opened her eyes again, and the fluorescent red numbers on the clock glared out at her. 11:04. She was about to close her eyes again, when she comprehended what the numbers meant.

Immediately she shot up out of Booth's arms, slamming her head on the headboard in the process, and sending the sheets sprawling across the bed. The loud whacking of the back of her skull against Booth's wooden headboard not only left Brennan dizzy and lightheaded, but alerted Booth to the fact that she was wide awake.

Brennan rubbed the back of her head, as she jumped out of the bed, searching for her sweatshirt which had somehow been discarded in her sleep last night. She hadn't even remembered taking it off.

She was so late. She had told Angela that she would pick up Chloe and Sam at 9, and it was definitely way past nine. She **hated** being late, especially for Chloe and Sam. It made her feel so guilty.

Booth sleepily rubbed his eyes, sitting up, and examining her curiously from his spot on the bed.

"Bones, what are you doing?"

She looked around frantically, pulling her hair into a messy pony tail, trying to find some semblance of order when she was so confused.

"Have you seen my sweatshirt? It was red?"

Booth pointed to where it was sprawled messily on the floor by the side of the bed. She picked it up quickly, running a hand through her hair, and looking at Booth. She bit her lip, tapping her foot quietly on the floor. Booth had to smile. Brennan never fidgeted, so it was amusing to watch. He could see she was clearly at a loss for words.

_That's a first._

"Where are you going?"

She looked around the room quickly, and then finally trained her huge blue eyes on him.

"I'm really late; I was supposed to pick up Chloe and Sam 2 hours ago. Angela is going to kill me."

Booth moved to stand up. "I'll go with you. I can explain it to Angela."

"No!"

It came out more forceful then she had intended, and she could see the surprise written across Booth's face.

Her voice softened, as she sat down on the edge of the bed, playing with the sheets as she looked up at him.

"I mean that wouldn't be a good idea, Angela will grill me enough already, and having you there will just add to the fire. Its not that I don't want you to come."

Booth looked at her, and she had to smile as his eyes full of understanding locked with hers.

"Later then? Coffee or something?"

She bit her lip, not wanting to say no. Looking down to avoid his gaze, she twisted her fingers in the sheets, before reluctantly meeting his eyes.

"I can't Booth. Today's the only day I have free with Chloe and Sam; I promised them I'd play soccer with them today. And obviously you wouldn't want to do that, I mean play soccer with me and two 3 year olds, that's probably not how you would want to be spending your Saturday, I mean I don't blame you, I---,"

"Bones, you're rambling."

She looked down. He was probably regretting forgiving her right about now. Why couldn't she ever be quiet?

"Sorry."

Booth tilted her chin so she was facing him, her eyes locking with his.

"Don't worry I think it's cute. And I'd love to play soccer with you guys. It'll be fun."

She nodded, suddenly quite aware of how close their lips were. She could almost taste his.

"Ok."

"Ok."

She looked into his eyes. She wanted to kiss him, she really did, but honestly she was afraid. She didn't want to get sucked back into Booth and everything that came along with him when she still wasn't fully sure that he was back for good.

He leaned in closer, so they were only centimeters apart, and just as their lips were about to meet, she sprung off the bed, blushing crimson, as she backed away from him, taking slow steps backwards toward the door.

"So I'll meet you at Rocky Creek Park at 2 o'clock?"

"Bones are you ok?"

She shook her head, trying to reassure herself.

"Me? Yes I'm fine. Of course I am . So I'll see you then?," She answered her own question as she continued backing away from him. " Bye gotta go."

Booth smiled as she turned, practically sprinting out of the apartment. "See you then Bones."

He knew that they had almost kissed was what had sent her into a panic. He couldn't help it. He knew things weren't perfect between them. Far from it. But at least they were somewhere. He didn't have any hell of a clue where.

The only thing he knew was that he had been wanting to kiss her breathless since the day he got back.

**You know you wanna press the button, make me happy :)**


	17. Waffles Are a Good Distraction

Brennan could detect the delicious aroma of waffles wafting out from Angela's kitchen even as she quickly hurried through the hallway. She quickly glanced down at her watch, wincing as the pretty pearl screen read 11:34.

Angela and Jack lived all the way across town, and past the downtown area, into the more rural tree lined roads. Brennan knew that Angela and Jack were trying for a baby, and Angela had wanted to live somewhere where they could raise a child and have a family. Crazy downtown DC with its interspersed college students, always flashing nightlife, and incessantly honking cabs was no place to start a family. Brennan should know, she had done it.

Luckily, Chloe and Sam hadn't proved to be "crying" babies, a fact that Brennan was extremely grateful for. She had read somewhere that twins were comforted being around each other, so Brennan had taken that advice putting Chloe and Sam in the same crib. They hadn't cried once throughout the months that were supposed to be "hard". That was part of the reason she kept them sleeping in the same room still, funny as it sounded they didn't seem to have as many nightmares as 3 year olds usually did.

That's why she already felt excruciatingly guilty for being late. It had taken all of her feelings towards Booth to override the logic last night that told her not to leave them with Angela. What if they had a bad dream, or woke up in the middle of the night not knowing where they were?

In the back of her mind, she doubted that they would. Sam and Chloe were two of the bravest 3 year olds she had ever met. She didn't know very many, but that wasn't relevant.

They weren't scared of anything. Snakes, spiders, the dark, medicine, flying. She wished she could be as fearless as they were.

There were so many things that she was afraid of. She hated to admit it to anyone. That was where she had gone wrong with Booth. She had told him how afraid she was.

She was afraid of being alone. It was irrational. After her parents left, she had been alone for so long, but she never wanted to go back there.

She was afraid that she'd close her eyes and be back in the foster system. Back where she didn't matter. Where all she was was another street kid with a ripped trash bag.

She was afraid that he'd leave again. That this was all just a lie. That he just wanted to hurt her more, and then he'd pull it all away from her. **Again.**

She only realized that she was leaning against the wall outside of Angela's kitchen when Chloe's loud giggles echoed throughout the house. She ran a hand through her hair sighing. How long had she been standing out here? She guessed she just had gotten caught up in her thoughts.

Quickly, she straightened out her shirt, making sure it didn't look like she had just tossed it on after sleeping with Booth. Of course it was in the literal sense, but still Angela would want all the details.

She bit her lip, and walked through the doorway of the kitchen. Her nose hadn't failed her as Chloe and Sam were indeed devouring huge plates of waffles covering in maple syrup in whipped cream. There seemed to be more maple syrup on their faces then on the plate, and Brennan had to laugh. She also laughed at Hodgins who was listening intently as the twins chattered incessantly to him.

Angela looked relieved and surprised to see her all at the same time. Her friend was wearing and apron that said "Kiss the Chef", her raven hair tied back in a bun. She smiled widely, coming over to hug her friend.

"Sweetie! Geez, I was so worried about you."

Brennan returned the hug, and she could see Chloe and Sam's faces light up behind her.

"I'm sorry Ange, I--,"

Her words were interrupted by the twins' squeals of joy as they launched themselves out of their chairs and at their mom, who smiled widely.

"Mommy! Mommy! We missed you!"

Brennan leaned down, picking both of them up, hugging them tightly. She noticed that Chloe's hair was tied in two perfect auburn braids hanging half way down her back, and she fingered them as she hugged the little girl.

"I missed you too. Chlo, did Aunty Angela braid you hair?"

Chloe nodded enthusiastically, her smile wide except for her missing front teeth.

"Yes! Isn't it pwetty Mommy?"

Brennan smiled. "It's really pretty."

Sam tapped his mom on the shoulder, eager to get a share of her much wanted attention.

"Guess what mommy?"

"What?"

"Jack showed me all thwese cool bugs, and then we went outfide and he showed me more!"

Brennan smiled widely, ruffling Sam's shaggy brown hair that was badly in need of a hair cut. She glanced over at Hodgins who grinned at her, nodding in silent understanding. Brennan was grateful that he'd been able to keep Sam occupied while she wasn't there.

"That's awesome babe."

"I know, and then Aunty Angewa made us waffles!"

"Did you say thank you?"

"Of couwrse we did mommy, we always say fwank you."

"Good, at least I did something right."

"I don't know what that means mommy."

Brennan smiled at their perplexed faces. "It doesn't matter."

She hugged them again before lowering them back to the ground where the scampered back on to their chairs to devour their syrup drowned waffles. She watched as the chattered aimlessly to Hodgins, biting her lip softly as she could feel her friends curious stare from across the kitchen.

She turned to look at Angela who was smiling mischievously at her as if she knew a secret. Angela always knew everything, a quality that Brennan half admired, half wanted to kill her for.

Making her way across the kitchen to where Angela was pouring batter into the waffle iron, she leaned against the wide counter, then pushing herself up onto it, winging her legs.

"So, I guess this means you fixed things with lover boy huh?"

Brennan resisted smiling, as Angela grinned widely up at her, she couldn't stop the smile from dancing across her lips, as she sighed.

"He's not…we're not."

"Oh come on sweetie, you so are. Don't lie about it."

"I'm not lying I promise. Nothing happened."

"Nothing? No passionate make-up sex against the bedroom door?"

"Ange! Chloe and Sam could hear. Or Hodgins."

"Please, Chloe and Sam wouldn't know sex if you dangled it in their faces, and Jack's busy eating his waffles."

Brennan chuckled softly, running a hand through her hair, looking over at Chloe and Sam, their dark hair shining in the late morning light.

"If nothing happened, why are you so late?"

"We just talked. And then I fell asleep. Nothing happened."

Angela studied her friend knowingly. "But you want it to."

Brennan sighed in frustration. "I don't know what I want."

"Yes you do Bren. You always know what you want, and I'm sure somewhere in that head of yours you know exactly what you want."

"I'm used to knowing what I want Ange. But this time, I honestly have no idea. I want to be happy. I want Chloe and Sam to be safe. I'm afraid. I'm afraid he's going to decide that we're not worth it."

Angela reached out, touching her friend's arm softly. "Booth won't leave you again."

"How can you be so sure?"

"He wouldn't risk loosing you again. Especially with Chloe and Sam in the picture. Booth isn't that type of guy."

"You make it sound so easy."

"It's not easy Brennan. But I want to see you happy," She motioned towards the two laughing twins sitting happily at the table. "I want to see them happy. You three deserve it, and you deserve it with Booth."

Brennan laughed, at how simple Angela made it sound. "Thanks Ange."

"No problem Bren, sometimes we all need a little help."

Brennan glanced down at her watch. It was already 12. How had a half and hour passed by already? She needed to get Chloe and Sam home so they could have lunch before they met Booth.

"Ange, I've gotta go."

"Now? Do you want some waffles?"

"No thanks, I'm meeting Booth at 2."

Angela smiled, raising her eyebrows. "Really? For what?"

"With Chloe and Sam, we're playing soccer."

"How romantic." Angela scoffed.

"Hey, I'm not going to waste the first sunny day we've had in weeks."

Angela waved a hand jokily towards her friend, smiling amused at her friend's idea of a date.

"Have fun on your date, or match or whatever."

Brennan grinned as she left Angela to man the waffle iron, as she tried to collect her two sticky children.

"Shut up."

They had just cleared their plates, their lips still sticky from the syrup.

"Chlo, Sammy, are you ready to go?"

They turned to face her, and she stifled a laugh at the syrup painted across their faces.

"Yeah mommy! Are we going to pway soccer?"

She ruffled Sam's hair, smiling. "Definitely, and guess who's coming?"

Their eyes widened in excitement as they responded simultaneously. "Who!? Who mommy?"

"Booth."

"Yay! Boof! Can we show him our jugwing?"

"Of course. You can show him whatever you want."

They immediately jumped out of the chairs, waving bye to Jack, and grabbing their mother's hands, dragging her over to Angela who they both hugged around her legs tightly, saying thank you as they pulled Brennan across the kitchen and towards the door.

Obviously, the mention of Booth had gotten them riled up. They seemed to really be drawn to him, and it was so surprise why since he was after all, their father.

"Bye Angewa! Bye Jack, come on mommy!"

Brennan followed Chloe's pushy demands, waving one last time to Angela, before they were out the door, and into the sunny March day. It was a day of possibilities, Brennan could feel it.


	18. The Perfect Score

**A little bit of fluff since this story has been lacking in it :)))**

Booth strode briskly through the bushes and bramble that covered the trail in Rocky Creek Park. He had no idea getting to a soccer field would take so much work. He sighed, stopping for a second as he watched Parker sprint up the inclined path ahead of him.

He stopped once he realized his dad wasn't behind him any more, turning, and putting his hands on his hips in annoyance.

"Dad! Hurry up! You told Dr. Bones that you would meet her at 2, and its 2:07. We're late, and you're going slow!"

Booth covered the ground between he and his son in a few quick strides, ruffling his hair much to Parker's irritation.

"Sorry buddy, I'll try and walk faster."

"Dad! Don't do that, you made it all messy."

Booth laughed at his son's vanity. Parker shook his head, his mop of curls covering his eyes. He continued to sprint up the hill, and Booth wished he had his son's constant liveliness.

He followed close behind, grabbing Parker around the waist much to his protests which were followed by bursts of laughter, and ran the entire way up the hill to the field, just to prove to his son that his father wasn't old yet.

As the got to the top of the hill, Booth was almost breathless at carrying his 70 lb son up the steep hill. He let Parker down, and leaned over, catching his breath.

He looked up to see the sprawling field in front of him. He couldn't believe that he hadn't been here before. He had lived in DC for years, and never once had he taken Parker to play here. Booth made a mental note to ask Brennan how she had discovered it.

Speaking of Brennan, Booth spotted her at the far sight of the field, and so had Parker as he set off running the length of the grass to catch up with his favorite doctor.

She was definitely a sight to take in. Her long legs ended in a pair of short black shorts, her red t-shirt tight in all the right places. Her dark hair was thrown up in a ponytail, and was blowing gently against her face in the warm March breeze.

He smiled widely, as she dribbled the soccer ball with a dexterity he didn't know she possessed, and wound her foot back to take a kick into the goal.

Booth watched curiously, wondering if Brennan actually could play soccer. He couldn't imagine her playing, as she usually stayed in the confines of her lab. Bones and competitive sports weren't a combination that he thought would mix well.

She sent the ball flying straight through the air, and swooshing satisfyingly into the left corner of the goal. Booth's eyes widened. She had taken that shot from at least 40 feet from the goal. That wasn't the type of shot that someone who didn't know how to play could muster. Brennan seemed quite satisfied with herself as she jumped up and down, smiling.

Chloe and Sam only reached Brennan as the ball had sailed into the goal, and they seemed quite annoyed that their mom had made a shot on them. He guessed it probably wasn't the first one of the day. She laughed as she stuck out her tongue at them, and they had to laugh along with her.

Booth hadn't seen Brennan so happy in a long time. She looked so free. He realized that was what had changed. She wasn't worried about the bones in the lab, or the next case, or whether or not she had to be at work on time. She was living in the moment like he had always told her to.

Chloe retrieved the soccer ball from the net, and kicked it to Sam whose face lit up when he saw Parker. Parker hugged Brennan, and then ran off to pass with Chloe and Sam as Brennan watched, smiling.

Booth approached her, yelling across the space between them.

"Nice shot."

She turned abruptly, smiling when she saw him.

"Thanks."

As the distance between them was covered, he noted to himself how good she really looked in the shorts. He stood next to her, watching as Chloe, Sam, and Parker squabbled between each other about who was the better dribbler.

She turned to look at him, a soft smile playing across her lips. "Hi."

"You never told me that you played soccer."

She smiled mischievously. "How do you know I played soccer?"

Booth gestured to the goal, grinning at her. "You just sunk a corner shot from almost half field. It's easy to tell that this isn't your first time out."

She smiled, shrugging nonchalantly as if the shot she had just made wasn't as great as he made it out to be. "Beginners luck?"

Booth scoffed. "You? Yeah right."

Brennan sighed, digging her cleats into the ground. Another sign this wasn't her first time.

"I was starting center forward and the MVP in my soccer league 5th through 8th grade."

Booth's eyes widened in surprise.

"You?"

She bumped her shoulder into him playfully standing on her tippy toes as she dug her cleats into the mud.

"Hey…is that so surprising?"

"I just never expected you to be a soccer player. I mean you're Bones. All logic, all science."

"Soccer is logical."

"Soccer is a sport. As much as you want to rip it to analytical bits Bones, you can never predict what's going to happen on the field."

"Yes you can. Players have different strategies; they favor different moves and plays. It's easy to predict what's going to happen."

Booth shook his head, laughing softly.

Leave it to Bones to turn everything into something logical.

"Ok Bones."

She could see he was laughing at her. "What?"

"Nothing. Let's just play soccer ok?"

She glared at him, walking towards where Parker and the twins were playing. She turned as she jogged off, smiling.

"Ok, but get ready to loose!"

Booth raised his eyebrows at her, jogging after her.

"Oh really?"

She nodded, as she approached Sam who was trying to pass the ball, before Brennan stole it away from him, kicking it into her hands.

"Mommy! I was twing to kick it!"

"I know, but we have to make teams."

"Teams?"

"Yes, teams. There are 5 of us, so I thought we could actually play."

Chloe and Sam caught sight of Booth, and jumped up and down waving enthusiastically.

"Hi Boof!"

"Boof do you wanna be on my team?"

Sam glared at his sister. "No, Boof be on my team!"

They ran towards him, crashing into him as they wrapped their small arms around his legs.

Booth was surprised, but he leaned down hugging them, wishing that he hadn't missed so much.

"Whose team do you wanna be on Boof? My wight?"

Booth was about to reply to the little girl when Brennan beat him to it. "Listen, you both can be on Booth's team. Me and Parker will be a team."

They jumped up and down, as Brennan smiled down at Parker who looked ecstatic to be on Brennan's team. Not only did he want to spend time with her, but he had seen that she was definitely good at soccer.

She draped an arm around Parker's slim shoulders, smiling down at him. "Is that ok Parker?"

"Yeah Dr. Bones, I wanna be on your team."

"Good." She turned back to Booth and Chloe and Sam who seemed to be whispering about play strategy. Booth obviously was underestimating her skills, and she knew she could play soccer in circles around him. She hadn't been named MVP for 3 years for nothing.

This was definitely going to be fun.

"So we'll play on this goal. First one to 10 wins."

Booth could see her eyes sparkling, as she grinned at him. He had a bad feeling that she was definitely as good as she said she was.

"Ok, but we get the ball first."

Brennan tossed Booth the ball. "Fine by me."

She leaned down to Parker. "So Parker, you can cover Chloe and Sam, and I'll take you dad. I'll get the ball away from him, and you stay open and then we can score, alright?"

Parker nodded. "Ok Dr. Bones."

Parker jogged off to cover the two twins who were enthusiastically waiting for Booth to pass to them. Brennan strode confidentially towards Booth, guarding him as he tried to dribble past her.

"Oh you're guarding me?"

"Do you think I was going to guard Chloe and Sam?"

"No, I just didn't think you could handle being beaten. I mean with all your 'predictions' and stuff."

She raised her eyebrows, grinning cockily at him.

"Predict this."

For a second he took his eyes off of the ball, and in that split second she had stolen it away from him, and was dribbling down the field towards Parker who was running away from Chloe and Sam who were pursuing him.

"Dr. Bones, I'm open!"

She kicked it to Parker, who wound up, taking his shot which landed perfectly in the middle of the goal.

Booth swore under his breath, as Brennan strode towards him and the smile across her face drove him crazy and made him want to kiss her at the same time.

"So….was that enough humiliation for you, or do you want some more?"

"I can take you; you just caught me off guard, that's all."

She nodded. "Sure."

"Ready?"

"Of course Booth."

Booth kicked the ball to Chloe, who dribbled half way down the field before trying to pass to Sam, except Parker got in the way, he kicked the ball to where he thought Brennan was, and it rolled and stopped 10 feet from the goal.

Brennan and Booth looked at each other, grinning, realizing that it would be a mad dash to get to the ball. They set off running, Brennan pulling ahead of Booth. She was so close to the ball, and as she moved to kick it, she tripped over it, falling completely face down on the grass. Booth tripped as he was right behind her, falling next to Brennan.

She could hear Chloe and Sam's giggles, from across the field, as they rolled on the ground laughing at their mom and Booth who were sprawled across the field.

That was humiliating.

She sat up, laughing at Booth who was rubbing his head which had hit hard on the ground next to her.

"Ow."

"Sorry, the ball. I misjudged it."

"That's ok Bones. You were always clumsy." He laughed, as she playfully swatted at him, falling into him. She looked up, realizing how close their faces were for the second time today.

She swallowed, her breath becoming rapid, as she pushed the hair out of her eyes. Kiss him. Don't kiss him. What the hell was she supposed to do? She stood up abruptly, trying to be logical.

"I'm sorry."

He stood up, disappointed that she had pulled away from him again. Maybe she really didn't want things to go back the way they were. Maybe they were destined to be just "partners". He hated the way that sounded.

"It's ok Bones."

The wind whipped her hair into her face, and she could see the clouds looming far away. She knew they had a few hours left before the rain came again. She stared at him, biting her lip, as he turned away from her, beginning to walk across the field.

The feeling in the pit of her stomach. She didn't want to let him go. She ran up to him, standing in front of him, and before she had even time to think about it, she crashed her lips against his.

He slid his hand behind her neck, pulling her closer to him, and deepening the kiss, letting their tongues mingle together as he opened her lips to his.

It was the best kiss, because everything was in that kiss. The loneliness and the anxiety, and the lies. She never wanted it to end. She finally had Booth back, and she wasn't letting him go anytime soon.

She pulled away, leaning her face into his chest, as he wrapped his arms around her. She leaned up, whispering in his ear.

"I missed you."

**Awww...**


	19. Giving In

**I'm sorry for how long this took guys...finals and such...but its summer now :))**

All she wanted to do was sleep. She wanted to lie down on her bed, her hair still wet from the shower, wearing only her huge sweatshirt and shorts and let sleep overcome her.

But of course she couldn't. First she had to deal with Chloe and Sam who still seemed to be bouncy off the walls, much to her dismay. They were supposed to be tired after four continuous hours of soccer. Instead they couldn't stop talking about Booth and Parker, and how nice they were, and how much they liked them, and how good they were at soccer.

Booth. She smiled thinking of the kiss they had shared. That kiss had been….perfect. She touched her lips, wishing that the tingling feeling would still be there, even though logically she was well aware it wasn't.

She was jolted out of her thoughts by Chloe's loud voice in her ear, and the tugging on her shorts.

"Mommy! Can you bwush my hair?"

Brennan smiled down at the little girl, running a hand over her wet mass of dark tangled hair falling down her back. She had given Chloe and Sam shower's right when they got home, knowing they would protest if she waited any longer.

"Sure babe." Brennan reached down, picking up the little girl and carrying her to the bathroom, where she sat her down on the counter top, as Chloe smiled, kicking her little feet in front her.

Brennan reached for the brush and the huge bottle of detangler knowing that Chloe's hair got just as unruly as hers did. It was an inherited trait.

She sprayed the detangler in the little girl's hair, running the brush softly through so she wouldn't pull her hair. "Where's your brother Chlo?"

Chloe dismissed this thought with a casual wave of her hand, and Brennan smirked. It reminded her so much of Booth. "He's weading a book."

"Oh ok, I was afraid you locked him in the closet again." Brennan resisted smiling too much, that didn't set a good example.

Chloe shook her head. "Don't worry mommy, I won't do's that again."

Brennan ran her hand over Chloe's wet hair as she brushed it. "Good. Cause you know that's not a good thing to be doing."

She continued to brush her hair, as Chloe looked down at her feet, as she swung them quickly against the cabinet's making banging noises as she went. Brennan smiled. She had never thought that this would be her. That this would be her life. She was a mother. Booth had always made comments about that. That she wouldn't know what it was like until she had children, and she had always brushed him off.

She knew now. They were the most important people in her life. She would do anything for them. It was a kind of love that didn't end.

There was just one thing missing. Booth. She wanted him to be a part of her life again. Of their life. That's why she had kissed him. It had just been one kiss; it didn't have to mean anything. She didn't know what was going to happen with Booth. Whether they were supposed to be together.

She had faith that they would be. She smiled. She never believed in faith before Booth.

"Mommy?"

"Yes?"

Brennan looked into Chloe's huge brown eyes. They were just like Booth's, sparkling and full of life.

"Do you like Boof?"

Brennan smiled, tracing Chloe's face with her finger. "Do you?"

Chloe frowned, crossing her arms over her chest. "Mommy! Answer my question firwst."

Brennan laughed at the little girl's stubbornness. "Yeah I do."

Chloe brightened, a wide smile dancing across her pretty little face. "I weally like him. He's nice."

"Yeah he is." Brennan thoughts were all on Booth now, and it was hard to stay in the conversation without wandering off.

"Does he like me?"

Brennan smoothed out Chloe's perfectly combed hair, kissing her lightly on the top of her head. She could smell the banana smoothie shampoo she washed the little girl's hair with.

"Of course he likes you Chlo. How could you not?"

Chloe smiled widely. "Can we play wif him tomorwow?"

"If he's not busy." In the back of her mind, she knew Booth wouldn't be busy if she asked him, and he definitely wouldn't be busy if Chloe asked him.

Chloe looked down disappointed; she fumbled with her fingers, knocking her heels against cabinet. "Oh."

Brennan felt bad for her response, and she put a finger under Chloe's chin, lifting her little face to look up at her. It reminded her so much of Booth. He **always** did that when she looked away from him. She loved it when he did that.

"Chloe I'm sure if you ask him, he will definitely be able to play."

Chloe's face brightened again. "Weally?"

Brennan nodded. "Really."

Chloe wrapped her arms around her mom, hugging her tightly. Brennan hugged her back, pressing her face into her daughter's banana scented hair.

"I love you mommy."

Brennan stroked her hair, smiling. That was what she loved the most about Chloe and Sam. There was always someone who loved her.

"I love you too Chlo."

Brennan lifted Chloe off of the sink, carrying her out of the bathroom. "Lets go and see that brother of yours shall we?"

Chloe nodded. "Yeah!" As the crossed the apartment, Chloe shouted out for her brother. "Sammy! Are you still alive?"

Brennan's eyes widened, and she laughed. "Chloe."

"Sowy…"

They walked into Chloe and Sam's room, where Sam was sitting on his bed reading a book about the human skeleton system. Brennan knew he couldn't read, but never the less it was never too early to start, and they loved the pictures.

She let Chloe jump out of her arms and onto her bed, where she jumped up and down a couple times before lying on her back, laughing.

Brennan sat down next to Sam, pulling the book down, and smiling at him. He smiled back brightly, his dark blue eyes shining. "Hi mommy!"

"Were you reading the bone book babe?"

"Yeah, I was looking at the piwctures."

Brennan was about to respond, when she was distracted by the springing sound of the bed behind her, and Chloe's infectious laughter ringing around the pink and blue walls. She turned to see Chloe jumping up and down on the bed, laughing manically as she sprung her tiny body at least 2 feet into the air.

"Look at me mommy! I'm fwying!"

Brennan didn't exactly know how to stop a little girl bouncing up and down, that hadn't been in any books she had read, or any advice she had been given.

What was the worst that could happen?

Sam watched his sister is awe, and sprung to his feet, catapulting himself into the air with joy. Soon they were both laughing hysterically, as they bounced up and down, their heads not even close to the ceiling.

"Me too mommy! I'm fwying too!"

"Come on mommy, twy!"

Brennan contemplated her options. She could try and grab them, but she knew they were way too fast for her. She could sit here like a party pooper, or she could join them. She decided on the last choice. She had never bounced on her bed, and she was eager to try.

She jumped up onto the bed next to Sam, who looked incredibly pleased to have her there. Brennan took a practice bounce to test the springs, before she really jumped. She couldn't help but laugh with Chloe and Sam. It was definitely fun.

"Mommy! Isn't it fun?"

Brennan laughed as she bounced, feeling as she was about five. It was a good feeling though.

"It's really fun!"

Sam tugged on her sleeve as he bounced next to her; she looked down, giggling as his hair bounced up and down against his face.

"Mommy! Twy and jump to Chloe's bed!"

Brennan eyed the distance. It was at least 4 feet, and she was probably sure she could make it, and the only thing that would be wounded was her pride and her ass.

"I'm not sure guys…"

"Aww…come on mommy! We'll make sure you don't get hurt."

Brennan rolled her eyes and laughed at two 3 year olds protecting her. What the hell. Sometimes she needed to be more adventurous.

"Fine, fine. I'll do it."

"Yay!"

She took a deep breath, a big bounce, and jumped across the gap. Her feet landed on the bed, and just as she was about to get her balance, she fell backward, depositing her butt hard on the floor.

Chloe and Sam erupted into fits of pealing laughter, so hard that they fell on their beds clutching their sides. Brennan laughed too, although her ass was in a bit of pain, it was pretty funny.

"Mommy, you fell!"

Brennan stood up, leaning over to tickle Chloe, which made her squirm around and burst even to hysterical laughter even more.

"Yeah, thanks to you."

"Stop, mommy that tickles!"

Sam was laughing hard at his sister under attack, and Brennan was about to give up on her daughter and gang up on Sam, when someone knocked loudly on the door. Brennan was puzzled. She hadn't talked to Booth about coming over because she knew he had Parker. She hadn't ordered food.

She stood up, smiling warily at her two laughing twins. "I will be back."

They nodded and laughed silently to each other as Brennan, stumbled partly across the apartment, her tailbone sore from hitting hard on the wood floor. She checked in the mirror quickly. Her hair was still wet and was making her sweatshirt wet as it dripped partly down her back.

She opened the door, and smiled widely when she saw who it was.

"Hey?"

"That sounded like a question Bones, not happy to see me?"

She smiled, opening the door to let him in. She didn't know where they were in their relationship, so she didn't lean in to kiss him. Were they there yet? Did he want to be there?

"No, of course I am. I just wasn't expecting you that's all."

"I heard screaming. And falling."

Brennan ran a hand through her wet hair, laughing lightly. "Oh we were just…ah…jumping on the bed."

The last part came out quieter, and Booth stepped closer, bridging the awkward distance between them.

"Sorry what was that? I didn't hear the last part."

She half glared at him, not wanting to admit her childish behavior. "We were jumping on the bed, alright?"

"Awww…that's so cute. Let me guess which awkward and uncoordinated one of you fell?"

She feigned hurt at his comment at her being clumsy. "I was trying to jump across the beds. Very difficult task."

He nodded in mock seriousness, the smile playing across his face. "What are you doing here anyway? Where's Parker?"

"He's at a sleepover." He put a hand to his heart in fake hurt. "And I'm hurt Bones, you don't want to see me."

"Listen, let me put Chloe and Sam to sleep. If that's possible, and then we'll talk, ok?"

He couldn't say no when her huge blue eyes were looking at him so pleadingly. "Ok."

Brennan smiled back at him as she walked back across the apartment. She was pleased that he had come all the way across town to see her. She knew Booth, when he had his mind set on something, he would get it. Booth had to apprehensions, no worries, nothing to tie him down.

But she, she was the one who had the problems. She was the one who dragged them down. She was the one who couldn't walk into a situation without apprehensions. Who couldn't go seconds without worrying, and thinking, and over analyzing everything.

That's why even though she wanted to, with every ounce of her being, she couldn't shake the fear she still had about their relationship. The butterflies in her stomach that just kept coming back every time she took another step closer to Booth.

As she walked into the twin's room, she was surprised to find them sprawled out on their beds, already asleep. She laughed. In the few brief minutes that she had spoken with Booth, they had probably been overcome with the exhaustion of the day, and literally passed out.

Brennan sighed, picking up Chloe and tucking her under the sheets, kissing her hair, and then doing the same with Sam. That was sort of a relief. It probably would have taken them at least a half and hour to fall asleep.

She ran a hand through her hair, leaning against the door frame, as she watched them sleep peacefully. They were so oblivious, so innocent. She didn't want them to have to watch she and Booth break up. What if they did? They were already attached to Booth, and they hadn't even told them the truth yet.

That was another thing. How were they even supposed to breach the subject? Chloe and Sam probably wouldn't even understand, but she still felt like she was hiding something. She hated that feeling.

She sighed quietly, flipping off the lights, and closing the door lightly so not to wake them up. She had found that they had great hearing, even when they were asleep. It wasn't necessarily a good thing.

Brennan found Booth in the living room, thumbing through her CD collection. He had always been curious about her taste in music for some odd reason. It had always amused her.

"Hey."

He turned, smiling when he saw her. "That was fast."

Brennan shrugged as if Chloe and Sam fell asleep that fast every night. "They were tired. Listen do you want a beer, or something?"

Booth knew she was trying to relieve some of the tension, and he loved her for that. "Sure, beer would be great."

Brennan opened her fridge, grabbing the beers, and handing one to him smiling.

"Thanks."

They sat down on the couch, and Booth took a big sip of his beer, trying to think of the words. He was rarely speechless, but he didn't even know where to start.

Brennan crossed her legs underneath her, sitting a comfortable distance away from him. She didn't know why this had to be awkward, it was just one kiss. It wasn't like they had committed to marriage or set off a nuclear bomb in the process.

"Really Booth, what are you doing here?"

Booth was somewhat surprised and comforted by her bluntness. He could always expect that from her.

"I wanted to talk to you. About us."

She sighed, taking a sip of her beer. "That's a pretty broad topic don't you think Booth?"

"You kissed me."

She nodded, and looked at him curiously as if she was inquiring silently as to where this was going.

"I kissed you."

"You know me Bones. I can't just leave that hanging. I want to know where we stand…and I don't expect you to answer everything right now, I know it's hard for you, but I---,"

He was stopped by her lips on his, as she kissed him quietly. Booth was caught by surprise, but he quickly pulled her close to him, tangling his fingers in her hair as their tongues mingled together for what seemed like hours.

They pulled back, breathless, Brennan's forehead pressed against his. She smiled at him, and he grinned back, tracing her jawbone with his thumb.

"Booth, I don't know what's going to happen or what we need to fix. I'm scared. You left, and that still hurts. But I do know that I want to be with you. No matter what happens, that's all I want."

She looked down, the way she did when she wasn't sure of a reaction, and he tilted her chin so her glassy blue eyes were staring at him.

He kissed her softly, whispering huskily in her ear. "All I want is you."

His voice in her ear sent shivers down her spine as his lips brushed her ear lobe in the sweetest of touches.

The next kiss was anything but sweet as Booth pulled her fiercely to him, crashing their lips together with heat that had been missed by both of them. They hadn't kissed like this in years, and Brennan smiled through the kisses at how good it felt.

Booth pulled her up off the couch, his fingers dancing on her hip bones, as he pulled her sweatshirt carefully over her head, pushing her against the door frame of her bedroom, as the continued to kiss, both of them out of breath.

Brennan pulled off his shirt, comforted by his warm bare skin pressing against hers. She didn't know what was going to happen, but this felt right. She had wanted this…forever.

"Bones, are you sure…this is what you want, we're not going to fast?"

Brennan grinned at him. That was something about Booth that was never failing, his sense of respect. He had never pushed her farther then she had wanted to go.

"You were gone for 3 years Booth. I want this."

He pressed his lips against hers again; grinning as he kicked the door closed and pulled her close to him. "Me too."

They stumbled back into the bedroom, the rest of their clothes quickly forgotten. For the first time, they didn't have to worry about being apart, because finally they had found each other. For so long they had been lost. And it felt good to be found by the one person who knew them.

**I love it when happy things happen...Hit the button...its lonely :))**


	20. Just Trust Me

**New post...sorry it took so long, but this should fufill your fluff quota for quite sometime...I hope :))**

Brennan woke up leisurely. She hadn't done that in years. Usually there was no time to sleep. She woke up every morning on the dot at 7:30. Or at least that's when Chloe and Sam woke up. It was an obvious given that they would wake her up only moments after they sprung from their beds.

She didn't blame them. They were 3. They didn't have any idea that maybe adults needed to sleep. So no matter what crazy hour of the night Brennan poured herself into bed, she would get up almost at the crack of dawn.

Sometimes as they ran screaming into her room, she would mock cover her ears with the pillow, and wish for the future when they would become teenagers and she'd be the one dragging them out of bed. If only.

She had woken up at 7; Booth's arm's still wrapped firmly around her, pulling her close to him in his sleep. She had listened half-heartedly if the twins had woken up. It was silent in the apartment, and she had decided that was good enough and fallen asleep again quickly.

When she had woken up again two hours later, without Booth next to her, she had been so tired and comfortable that her eyes had fought to stay open, and she had fallen back asleep.

Now, as she turned over, the sheets still entwined around her body, which was bare except for Booth's large t-shirt, she was surprised to see 10:34 flashing quietly on the alarm clock next to her bed.

She quickly jumped out of bed, running a hand through her hair which was still messy from last night with Booth. She smiled subconsciously as she thought about it.

_It was amazing. Being with Booth, I forgot what it was like._

Quickly the smile disappeared from her face as the idea set in that Booth was in fact, missing. He shouldn't have left that quickly, without even saying goodbye. Maybe he decided that this wasn't a good idea. That he doesn't want me.

_He promised. He promised he wouldn't leave me again._

She grabbed a pair of jeans, pulling them on quickly, and throwing Booth's t-shirt off, grabbing a sweatshirt, as she hurried out of her bedroom to find where exactly Chloe and Sam were.

Pulling her messy hair into a ponytail, she stopped short when she entered the rest of the apartment, taken aback by what she was seeing.

It wasn't bad, but she intentionally leaned back behind the door frame and watched where she knew they couldn't see her.

_He didn't leave. _

She felt a wave of relief wash over her, as she watched Booth and Parker teach Chloe and Sam how to make pancakes.

Brennan wasn't emotional. She could be faraway, cold, and distant with the best of them. She was a pro at hiding what she was feeling, but in that moment she almost felt like crying. Good tears, but crying none the less.

It was like nothing had changed. She watched as Booth helped Sam spoon the thick creamy batter onto the hot griddle, and Sam's elation as the pancake sizzled and turned a perfect golden brown when Booth flipped it with ease.

Chloe eagerly tapped Parker on the shoulder, who looked like he was having a great time. He graciously helped Chloe throw chocolate chips onto her pancakes, while she clapped her hands together hugging Parker tightly.

Brennan wondered whether or not Parker had caught on that he and Chloe and Sam might possibly be related. Parker was a smart kid, and Brennan wouldn't be surprised if he didn't suspect something.

She watched for a couple more minutes, and flinched when a thick wave of guilt flowed over her and settled itself on her shoulders. They should have had this before. It was her fault that they didn't have there father. She felt almost as bad as her own parents.

Chloe and Sam deserved to have Booth. She was sad that he had missed the beginning of their lives. She tried to reassure herself. It wasn't really her fault. It wasn't anybodies.

_I can't change the past. But I can change the future. I want Booth in it._

Deciding that she had acted like a stalker for long enough, Brennan emerged from behind the door, making herself visible as she walked into the kitchen.

Booth noticed her first and grinned broadly. "Morning Bones. Did you sleep well?"

She could see the mischievous glint in his eyes, and she smiled back at him. "Very well thanks."

Chloe and Sam looked up, smiling widely when they saw their mom, the quickly jumped off the stools that they were standing on, almost shoving Booth over in the process, and abandoning their pancake-making endeavors to run and catapult themselves into Brennan's arms.

"Mommy! Good morning!"

Brennan hugged them tightly, before letting them down as they pulled her across the kitchen back to Booth.

"Mommy, mommy guess what? Boof helped us make pwancakes, see!"

Sam interjected his sister, not wanting to be left out of the story telling. "First we goes to pick up Pawker, and the Boof is teaching us how!"

Brennan nodded in approval, smiling at how excited by this prospect they were. They clearly already adored Booth, so she didn't have to worry about that.

"Do you want to show me what you made?"

They nodded in heavy enthusiasm as they pulled her around the counter to show off their handiwork. As they were having difficulties climbing up the stool which Booth helped them with, Brennan ruffled Parker's hair, smiling widely at him.

"Hey Park."

Parker grinned at her as he simultaneously flipped the pancakes on the griddle. The little boy was already so much like his father. It was something to be proud of.

"Hi Dr. Bones."

"Mommy! Look at my pwancakes!"

Chloe glared at her brother, trying to elbow him out of the way. "No mommy look at mine first!"

Brennan threw a smile at Parker, before she found her way to their pancakes, which happened to be right next to Booth.

"I'll look at both, alright. At the **exact** same time." Brennan emphasized the word exact so that they would know she wasn't choosing one over the other. She could and would never choose.

They both sighed in relief, and she saw out of the corner of her eyes Sam shoot Chloe a smile of satisfaction.

As she was studying the slightly lopsided, but perfectly golden brown pancakes, she felt Booth wrap his arm around her waist, pulling her close to him. She looked up at him, and smiled, and she smiled back at her, placing a soft kiss on her temple.

She had missed this. Just "being" with him. She sort of forgot how to do it. And how easy it was. Just being.

"Mommy how do the look?"

Brennan leaned into Booth, smiling at the one Mickey Mouse shaped pancake that she assumed was Sam's and the giant one almost taking up half the griddle that was Chloe's. They might not be the most attractive things in the world, but she was sure as he11 that they tasted good.

Booth had always been amazing at making pancakes, and as her stomach clued her into the fact that she was starving, she could think of nothing more than devouring one of those pancakes.

"Great. They look great." She pointed to the Mickey Mouse-ish one, "That's Mickey right?"

Sam nodded happily at his mother's recognition. She pointed to the giant one. "And that's yours Chlo?"

She nodded, "Yes, it's the worwld mommy."

Brennan smoothed the little girl's hair, as she stared up at her mother in expectation with her huge brown eyes.

"Of course it is babe."

Chloe grinned, and then tugged at Booth's shirt in anxiety. "Boof! I think they're ready!"

Booth avoided laughing at the little girl's apparent sincerity about the pancakes as he flipped them off the hot griddle and onto the waiting plates.

"Thanks Boof!"

Booth smiled as they scampered off to the table, plates in hand, and Parker followed quickly behind with the forks, syrup, and most importantly the napkins.

"Don't forget to cut the pancakes before you eat them!"

They nodded with as much sincerity as they could muster before digging into the pancakes.

"We will mommy!"

Brennan laughed, and turned back to Booth, who was pouring more batter onto the griddle. She crossed her arms over her chest in mock irritation.

"I'm disappointed. Where are my pancakes?"

He grinned, pulling her close to him, and tracing light kisses on her neck before he tilted her chin, catching her lips in his.

He pulled away to make sure the pancakes didn't burn, leaving her lips tingling with the sensation of his kiss. "I'm making a special batch for you."

"Good."

Grinning, she hoisted herself onto the counter, knocking her bare heels against the wood. She reminded herself of Chloe. Some traits are inherited.

"Booth."

He looked up at her, flipping the pancakes with effortlessness that she wished she possessed in the kitchen.

"Yes Bones?"

"Last night was great," She blushed, and bit her lip. "I missed you."

He grinned at her embarrassment, flipping off the fire on the grill so the pancakes wouldn't burn as he moved in front of her, placing a hand on either side of the counter where she was sitting.

"I'm not finished. I thought that you had left. That you decided that you didn't want this." She looked down, concentrating on the hard wood floor.

Booth frowned, sliding a hand behind her head, tracing the back of her neck with his fingers so she wouldn't be able to look away from him like she always did when she was unsure.

"Hey look at me Bones. I know that this is hard, but I need you to trust me ok? That's not going to happen again. I'm not going anywhere."

She looked up, instantly comforted by his eyes that were drinking her in with curiosity.

"I know. I want to trust you Booth, but it's going to take a little while. I just need time."

He caressed her cheek with his thumb, smiling reassuringly at her. "You can have as much time as you need Babe. However long it takes."

She smiled widely at the pet name he had addressed her with. She hadn't heard that out of Booth's mouth for years, and as much as she had begun to object it, she had missed it.

Leaning up, she kissed him softly, finding solace from being in his arms. From his touch. He had always been able to give that to her, and she couldn't imagine ever wanting to give it up.

She pulled back smiling, and tilted her head to where Chloe, Sam, and Parker were eagerly wolfing down their pancakes.

"I don't know how to tell them Booth. About us. About you being their father."

Booth smiled. "Bones, they're 3. I don't think you're going to have much trouble."

She smiled widely, her eyebrows raised. "Oh now I get to tell them by myself? Don't you think they're gonna want an explanation from you."

He reached over, tucking a stray piece of hair behind her ear. "Bones, you're over thinking this. They're 3 year olds, not rocket scientists. They'll be happy to have someone new in their life."

Brennan shrugged, trying to follow Booth's logic. "They already love you."

She was happy when Booth's face brightened. "Really?"

She laughed at his obvious obliviousness. "Of course. All they can talk about it Booth this and Booth that. They were never this enthusiastic about any of my boyfriends," She frowned, "In fact I think they booby trapped them."

Booth laughed, and then studied her with curiosity. "How many boyfriend did you have Bones?"

She glared at him playfully. "Don't say it like that. One, you probably don't want to know, and two, none of them lasted long. I'm not going to lie to you about what happened while you were gone," She smiled at him, "You're just going to have to trust me."

He groaned as she used his words against him. He hated it when she did that; it drove him crazy to no end.

He kissed her gently, cupping her face in his hands. "How about we just don't talk about what happened when I was gone? Ok?"

She nodded. She wanted to put the past behind them. She wanted to start over.

"Ok."

He kissed her again, and he could feel her smiling into the kiss. Something only Bones did. He loved it.

"I will tell you one thing though."

"Shoot." Booth wasn't exactly sure if he wanted to hear about her exploits with the opposite sex, but he wanted her to trust him.

"For the first time since you've been gone, I'm happy again."

He smiled, knowing it took a lot for her to say something like that. Leaning in and kissing her gently, he whispered softly in her ear.

"That's all I want."

She smiled, wrapping her arms around him, for the first time, feeling as if there was someone who cared about her.

He always cared about her.

_I'm happy too Bones._

**They're happy...B+BHAPPINESS...now make me happy and press the little blue button ;)**


	21. Almost and Again

**I'm going on a mini vacation w/ my friend till friday so no post till then...but then they're will be a nice long one...promise :)) R/R please**

Brennan collapsed on her bed, fighting the urge not to shut them and let sleep take over. She was tired, and logically she had every right to be. The day had been one for the books, not that she was exactly complaining.

After Chloe and Sam had ingested enough pancakes to make a large elephant hyper, they had literally bounced around the walls of the apartment, jumping and laughing and screaming making Brennan feel the strain to either get a bigger apartment or buy a house. She didn't admit it to herself, but she didn't want to be in a house by herself.

They had begged she and Booth to "play" with them. Brennan knew very well what that meant. It meant that they had an allotted amount of time to find some activity to engage the twins in, or else they would explode. They were like little ticking bombs of destructive energy.

Brennan had wracked her brain trying to think of something to do with them. She didn't want Booth to think she was a bad parent. She hated being nervous around him, but it felt like their relationship was just starting again, like everything was new. Which it was. She wasn't used to having someone in her life that was there. That cared.

She had been saved by Booth when he had the idea to take them to a giant playground which he had always taken Parker to when he was little. Brennan had agreed reluctantly, knowing that a playground wouldn't occupy them for longer then an hour.

Booth had delivered though, because when they arrived at the playground, it turned out to be more of a play world. Giant and wooden, with swings, climbing ropes, ladders, slides, tire swings, and tunnels galore, it was enough to occupy a whole tribe of 3 year olds.

They had stayed for hours, watching as Chloe, Sam, and Parker played happily on the huge structure. Booth had draped his arm around her when they sat down on the bench, pulling her close to him in a way that she knew in the back of her head was alpha-male protectiveness, but in the less logical side of her mind made her feel like the luckiest women in DC.

A wave of nostalgia had washed over her, remembering the times when she and Booth would watch Parker play. When he had left, she had never thought they would be back like this. Never the less watching their own children play, it seemed like something from a parallel universe.

Chloe and Sam had been satisfied with she and Booth just watching for about a half and hour, but soon they had dragged off the bench, explaining that they weren't getting any exercise, and they wanted them to play with them.

Brennan and Booth had chased them up and down the structure, until Brennan felt like she was going to pass out. Chloe and Sam had been satisfied with she and Booth swinging on the swings while they played, just as long as they were doing something.

Brennan ran a hand through her hair, smiling as she kicked off her shoes, thinking about the swings. Booth had pushed her, and then stopped her midway, so her feet were dangling just above the ground. She loved how he had leaned in, kissing her until she couldn't breathe.

The afternoon had been perfect. She didn't feel like she deserved it thought. Like she was living with some dark cloud over her head, just waiting to pour down on her. It was a weird feeling to be with Booth again. Weird in the sense that people who left almost **never** came back. She had grown accustomed to that.

She didn't know how to react when they did. Was she supposed to just pretend like it never happened? Did she tell Booth how confused she was feeling? Was she supposed to move on? She didn't know how to handle the unusual emotions swirling around in her head, but she knew that she didn't want to loose Booth again.

She sighed, dragging herself off the bed as she discarded her sweatshirt in favor of not sweating to death. For April, it was surprisingly hot, and she desperately wanted to sit on her fire escape letting the cooler air tickle her skin and wish Booth there so he could wrap his arms around her and kiss her as the moon rose above them, and then he'd carry her into her bedroom laying her down on the bed and….

"Mommy! Awen't you going to tell us a storwy?" Back to reality. She smirked to herself, as she walked across the apartment, trying to abandon the unclean thoughts that had clouded her mind.

They weren't going to happen anyways, as Booth had taken Parker back to New York to spend the week with his mom, and he probably wouldn't be back until late.

_That's what I get for fantasizing._

She walked into their bedroom, where Chloe and Sam were both sitting on their beds, careful anticipation bubbling on their small faces.

"Of course I'm going to tell you a story, but you have to get in bed."

They frowned, but begrudgingly wiggled underneath the sheets. "But I don't want to go to bed mommy."

Brennan ruffled Sam's hair, much to his annoyance as he squirmed away from her. "Too bad babe, tomorrows a school day."

Sam frowned, pulling the sheets all the way up to his chin. Obviously they weren't feeling the heat. "Oh."

Chloe peeked her eyes out from in front of the covers, pleading in her huge brown eyes.

"I don't wanna goes to school mommy."

Brennan looked at her daughter trying to reason with her. They had been through this many times before. "Chlo, you have to go to school."

Chloe pouted in frustration, crossing her small arms across her chest in a gesture that reminded Brennan very much of herself.

"But I wanna stay home and play wif you and Boof!"

Sam piped up in excitement. "Me too!"

"I have to go to work tomorrow, you know that. And so does Booth, we work together."

Their eyes widened. "You work with Boof!?"

Brennan sighed, thankful that the topic had changed and three year olds had such a short attention span.

She smiled, the memories of their partnership were good ones. "Of course, we're partners."

"Pawrtners?"

She nodded, the curiosity on their faces was obvious. "It means that we help each other at work."

They nodded, and then Chloe leaned over and whispered something in Sam's ear and making him laugh.

"Mommy, we think Boof has a cwush on you."

She laughed, as the studied her trying to gauge her reaction. They could almost read people as well as Booth, and they were only 3. It sort of scared her. And she was sort of jealous.

"Oh do you?"

Chloe nodded matter a factly. "Yes. Why don't you marry him?"

Brennan coughed, and laughed. The logic of a three year old was impossible to understand. She wasn't going to marry Booth. Not now. She didn't believe in marriage.

_Would I get married for Booth? Am I ready for that?_

"Maybe."

That was satisfying enough for them. Chloe nodded in approval. "Ok mommy. Now tell us our stowry."

Sam nodded enthusiastically. "Yeah mommy."

"Ok, ok. You guys were the ones distracting me."

"Sowy mommy." They buried their head guiltily into their blankets, and Brennan reached over, pulling the covers down.

"That's ok. Before the story there's something I have to tell you."

They yawned simultaneously. Maybe twins really are connected. "Ok mommy."

She watched as they leaned their heads against the pillows, and she knew she only had a few minutes until they were completely passed out.

"It's about your dad."

A muffled "ok" was heard from underneath the pillows. "Well, your dad was away on a trip for a while. He had to do something important, but he really didn't want to leave you. And I know that we've been spending a lot of time with Boof."

"I like Boof."

"I know you do, and the reason you like him so much. Its because, Booth is….I mean this is hard to say….he's…he's your dad."

Silence. Maybe they were too stunned. She didn't expect them to understand. Realizing she had been concentrated on the sheets, she looked up to see them snoring softly.

She laughed. They hadn't heard anything. It was sort of a relief. She wasn't sure that she was ready to tell them that yet. Running a hand through her hair, she laughed again. It wasn't really funny, but more ironic.

"That didn't really go as planned did it?"

She jumped, turning around to see Booth leaning against the door frame, smirking in that sexy way that drove her absolutely crazy.

"How long have you been standing there?"

"Long enough. Them falling asleep, was that what your strategy was? Cause I've heard subliminal messages during sleep can be very effective."

She glared at him, walking past him closing the door to the twins bedroom, she tried to resist his charms, especially since he had been eavesdropping annoyingly on her.

"How did you get in here?"

He grabbed her arm, spinning her around to face him. "You're not gonna even say hello?"

She looked into his eyes, as his fingers grazed her chin lightly, pulling her lips to his without a word between them. She loved that about him. It was the only thing he was blunt about. Kissing her.

She pulled back breathless, and smiling. "Hi."

Grinning, he leaned her against the door, letting a hand rest easily on her waist. "I wasn't in the special forces for nothing. Breaking into your apartment was easy."

She smiled. "That's good to know. I'm never alone."

"Don't put it that way Bones. That makes me sound like a stalker."

She nodded. "Your behavior exhibits some of the signs of beginning of obsession. Continuous calls, following without acknowledgement, breaking into my apartment."

He pointed a finger at her shaking his head. "One, you actually broke into my apartment last week, and two those signs could also be called a relationship my most peoples standards.

"That is what stalkers believe they're doing. Having a relationship with their victims. "

He leaned in closer, so their faces were almost touching. She smiled, enjoying his closeness. "I am not stalking you."

She ducked underneath him "Good." She smiled as he followed her across the apartment.

"Bones, where are you going?"

"I want to sit on the fire escape."

Booth frowned, but followed her never the less. "That's a bit random, but I'll go with it."

She stopped at the window at the far end of her apartment, bending down to force it open. Booth quickly helped her, and made sure to keep a tight hold on her arm while she climbed out into the night.

"Careful Bones."

She glared at him, but didn't push him away. She wasn't exactly welcoming to falling 6 stories.

Brennan settled herself on the fire escape, the cool iron comforting against her warm skin. The view of DC was amazing. The little lights twinkled as if they were miles away. She loved that about her apartment. It just felt like she was away from everything.

Booth climbed out next to her, wrapping his arms firmly around her, and pulling her close to him.

"Whoa…it's pretty high up here."

She smiled as he absentmindedly ran his knuckles up and down her bare arm.

"I know, I love it up here. I come here to think, because it's just so…far away."

"You never told me that before."

"I know. I never take anyone out here. It's my place."

He smiled, taking the opportunity to tease her a little bit. "I thought you didn't think objects or places had any value."

She shook her head. "I don't, but I don't know….being out here just calms me down."

He kissed the top of her head softly, watching the moon rise above the city. They were silent for a while, immersed in their thoughts.

"Booth what are we doing?"

"Sitting on a fire escape?"

She elbowed him playfully in the ribs. "No I mean, this. Us. Are we in a relationship?"

"Do you want to be Bones?"

He could see her eyes glistening deep in thought in the darkness. "Stop answering my questions with questions."

"I thought we were."

She thought for a second, tracing the iron bars of the fire escape with her fingers.

"Me too."

She could see Booth smiling widely in her peripheral vision. She thought about Chloe's comment.

"Do you want to get married?"

He flinched. "What?"

"Do. You. Want. To. Get. Married?" She said the words slowly.

"I'm not stupid Bones, I know what you said."

"I mean not now, but do you expect me to?"

"I expect you to be yourself. And if getting married isn't what you want, then we don't have to. I want you. Not someone you pretend to be. I love you, and a piece of paper isn't going to change that."

She swallowed. The only words she had heard were "I love you". He loved her. Still? After everything? It seemed highly irrational.

She looked down. "Booth…I think…I know it's highly irrational, but I think I love you too."

Booth smiled, tilting her chin up to face him, and bringing her lips to his. Bones had always had an incredibly hard time telling people she loved them. She'd mumbled it a couple times to him, but never straight to his face. He couldn't help but grin.

"As long as it works logically."

She nodded, loving him even more for not pushing the subject. She leaned up, letting his lips catch her in a fiercer kiss then the one before. Booth, let his hand's roam under her shirt, tracing her hip bones with his fingers. He pressed her back down against the iron grating of the fire escape, pulling himself on top of her as the kisses got more and more heated.

She laughed, wrapping her arms around his neck, as his body hovered centimeters above hers as their lips remained locked in heavy embrace.

"Don't push me over the edge Booth. It's a long ways down."

He smiled before kissing her again. "You're safe."

_I like it when my fantasies come true._

**Cuteness...I couldnt resist :))**


	22. Forgotten Fear

**Sorry for the wait..i was on vacation sort of...but anyways here it is...and i have to warn you it is angsty the end...you didnt think B/B would get off that easy didja :)...**

Brennan usually wouldn't do this sort of thing. She wasn't one to ask for help. It was easier if she just pretended like she could handle everything on her own. Most of the time she could. Most of the time she had no problem pushing away feeling of fear and uncertainty, but right now she felt like there was no where to run from herself. No where to hide.

This seemed so much bigger then her…It felt like this was either going to **be** her life, or it wasn't. She hated herself for getting this far in without even having a second thought in her head.

_I am in __**way**__ over my head._

It had seemed so easy to just fall back into love with Booth. To forgive him so easily. Was that really smart? Was it the right thing to do?

That was why she was now leaning against the wall outside a certain eclectic artist's office, trying to summon the courage to admit she needed help.

It had only hit her how fast things had gone back when she woke up in his arm's, remembering that she had told him she loved him the previous night. That seemed so…wrong wasn't the word. Because she did love him, more than she cared to admit. It seemed like she wasn't thinking clearly. No that wasn't it. That made it sound like she didn't love him.

_I do love him He loves me. Why can't I just let it be that simple?_

She was scared. That was what the problem was. She bit her lip, dreading the word. It was fear of being in a relationship, of giving herself so much to another person. Fear of needing Booth. Fear of having him leave again.

When he had left, the abandonment issues that she had so desperately tried to push behind her, to keep in the past, came roaring full-throttle back at her without even a moments warning.

She was scared, and when she was scared it was easy just to close up and push him away. But she didn't want to push him away. It wasn't just about her anymore. It wasn't just about them. They had Chloe and Sam to think about.

That's why before she took the leap of faith to tell the twins about Booth, she decided she needed the advice of her best friend who usually helped her out. She hoped Angela would have something to say. She needed that.

Taking a deep breath, she entered the office, where Angela was working on a sketch at her desk. Her face brightened when she saw her friend standing nervously in the doorway.

"Hi Ange."

"Hey sweetie, what's going on?"

Angela stood to give her friend a hug, her long dark hair brushing against her shoulders as Brennan hugged her back in surprise.

_Angela's like me. But with emotions. She knows things. I wish I knew those kinds of things._

Brennan sat down in the chair across from Angela, admiring the bouquet of thick perfectly pink roses perched in a vase on Angela's desk.

Angela smiled, seeing her friend eye them curiously.

"Pretty aren't they? Hodgins brought them for me this morning." Brennan smiled, seeing Angela's obvious contentment in her relationship. She envied her friend.

"I'm not sure if I'm doing the right thing Ange."

The artist could see the nervousness in her friends face, and wondered what was going on. Things with Booth seemed pretty good, so she contemplated what it could possibly be.

"Right thing in what?"

Brennan bit her lip, looking up at Angela, trying to find a way to explain.

"With Booth. I mean I don't know if this is what I'm supposed to do. Are we supposed to be together, because I feel like I'm being stupid. I'm letting him in, and rationally I should be evaluating the situation for possible risks and problems, but I'm **not** Ange…I'm not, and I'm afraid I might be letting him get too close."

Angela wanted to hug her friend tightly for trusting her so much. Brennan wasn't an easy women to get to open up, and the fact that she had willingly come to Angela for help was a _huge_ step.

"Bren…It's normal to have apprehensions in a relationship, especially you and Booth. You give complicated a whole new meaning. In the dictionary there would be a picture of you two next to the word. I think its good sweetie, that you're not thinking so much…"

Angela could see her friend thinking deeply. "No. That's just the thing Angela. I'm not thinking. I'm afraid that I'm going to be so deeply in the relationship, without even thinking about it first, and then Booth is just going to up and decide that it's over."

Angela opened her mouth to speak, but Brennan stopped her knowing exactly what Angela was going to say.

"And don't say he would never leave me. He has. What the he11 am I supposed to do if he does it again?"

Angela shook her head, looking Brennan straight in the eye. "He wouldn't."

"How do you know that? I told him I need time to trust him again, but if I don't figure out soon Ange, he's going to think I'm trying to push him away."

It made Angela upset seeing Brennan so clearly distraught. So overwhelmed with the thought of loosing Booth again. Booth hardly knew the number he had done on her last time, and she would personally beat him to a pulp if he hurt her best friend again.

"He knows you sweetie. He knows you need the time."

"Are you sure?"

Brennan wanted to trust Angela's words, but part of her was not believing it. She wanted to believe it. She wanted everything to be ok.

Angela nodded. "Yes."

There was silence as Brennan contemplated Angela's logic, her fingers tracing the edges of the rose petals lightly.

"You haven't told them yet, about Booth."

Brennan shook her head, looking away from Angela. "Sweetie I know what you're thinking. That if you tell them, everything is just going to be set in concrete. But it doesn't have to be."

Brennan looked at her hopefully. "It doesn't?"

Angela laughed lightly. "No it doesn't. If you want to wait to tell them, you can wait. If you want to tell Booth that you need to spend a little time apart, do it Bren."

"You think?"

"Yes sweetie…if Booth wants to be with you and you want to be with him, then things will work out. I promise."

Brennan smiled as she stood up, reassured by Angela's words. Maybe that's all she and Booth needed. A little time. "Thanks Ange."

Before Brennan could exit the office in a mad dash, Angela flung herself at her friend, almost knocking Brennan over in the process. Brennan could pretend like she didn't need to be hugged sometimes, but Angela knew she appreciated it.

"You'll be ok Brennan."

Brennan pulled back, smiling as she walked out the door. "I always am."

Angela nodded, as she meandered back to her desk to finish the sketch for Zach. Even if things got hard for her friend, she was right; she always in the end was ok. Especially if she had Booth to take care of her. That's all anyone needed.

Booth tried concentrating on the massive stack of paperwork, but his mind wasn't cooperating. Either was his stomach. All he could think about was he and Brennan, and Chloe and Sam, and Parker, and fulfilling his hunger. Funny combination.

He gave up chucking his pen on the desk and leaning back in his chair, sighing. It was nearly 2 o'clock, that's why he was hungry. He contemplated calling Brennan for lunch, but he figured she had already eaten.

His mind was too full. Things seemed good with them. He grinned, thinking about the night before. He11 things seemed great. She had told him she loved him, something he knew didn't come easy to her.

But as much as things could **seem** perfect, he could tell they weren't. He knew Brennan, and he could tell that she was still apprehensive. Scared even of being with him. He knew that it was only a matter of time before she voiced this to him. He wanted things to be alright with them, but it wasn't going to be smooth sailing the whole way. He knew they hadn't even hit a real obstacle yet. Thank god.

Booth was about to try and start on the paperwork again, when he was saved by a gentle knocking. Looking up, he smiled when he saw Brennan standing slightly nervously in the doorway.

"Bones, hey."

He stood up, making his way across the office to her. He pulled her into the office, shutting the door and pressing her against the wall kissing her lightly on the lips away from the prying eyes of the agents that had curiously watched her walk through the bullpen.

She smiled at his enthusiasm. "Hi."

"What are you doing here? I was just thinking about you actually."

She smiled, and then bit her lip. He could tell that her visit wasn't purely to "visit" him.

"I wanted to talk to you."

He shrugged, nodding. "Is something wrong Babe?"

She shook her head, stepping back to create some distance between them. She couldn't think when their bodies, their lips were so close.

"No, nothings wrong. I mean not really. I just..." she paused. "I think we're going too fast."

He hadn't expected that. "Too fast?"

She looked down, jamming her hands into the pockets of her jeans. "Yes too fast. I don't think that I can do this."

Booth's face darkened, trying to figure out what she was saying. Before he could say anything she continued.

"I mean not like that Booth. I want to be with you, but I don't know if it's the right thing."

"Do you think you could spare me your god damn logic just this once Temperance?"

She recoiled slightly at his harsher tone, looking away from him. She could feel the hot stinging of tears and she quickly blinked them back. She didn't want to cry. Not now.

He wasn't taking this the right way. She didn't not want to be with him. She wanted this. She just needed space to think.

"Don't talk to me like that."

Booth's face softened, immediately feeling bad, seeing that he had visibly upset her. He didn't want that, but he didn't know what the hell she was doing.

"I don't understand what you're saying Bones."

"You left me Booth," She paused as their eyes met, "I was so…broken after that. And now I'm diving into this relationship like nothing has happened. I just think that we need to take some time, that I need to take some time to think about everything."

"How long?"

She shook her head, biting her lip as she looked at him. "I don't know."

Booth was angry. Not at her, but at himself. He had screwed **everything **up. He had screwed Brennan up, and now their relationship was going to pay for it. Rage with himself he hadn't felt since his days as a sniper filled his body, clouding his mind.

"Ok fine, go. Go take your space, or time or whatever the he11 it is. Call me when you've made up your mind."

The hot tears blurred her vision, and she wiped them away. Booth's eyes were dark, and she couldn't read him, but his cold words shook her. It sounded like he didn't care, and she knew he did. She didn't want to hurt him.

Her voice shook as she took a step towards him. "Booth I----,"

He took a step backward, distancing himself from her. "No Bones go. I understand. You need your time. Get out of here."

_I didn't want it to happen like this. I'll I need is just a little time. Why is he acting like this._

"Fine." Brennan wiped away the tears furiously, turning quickly and walking quickly out of the office. She needed to get as far away as she could before she broke down into sobs. He didn't deserve to see her cry. Not now.

It felt like she'd been shot through the heart.

No wonder gun shot wounds take so long to heal.

**It was angsty i know...reveiw please...buttonlove ;)**


	23. Self Destruct Without You

**Heres the new chapter...i cant keep them away from each other for long...R/R thanks :)**

_It's all my fault._

Booth could hardly feel the pain anymore. It rocketed up from his fists, causing his arms to ache with every satisfying hit he took. He threw his whole body into his punches, trying to focus the rage that wouldn't stop coming.

He thought if he punched hard enough, that maybe the stinging and the blood staining his knuckles would take away from the aching he way feeling in his heart. The horrible agony that made him feel like he was going to break into two.

He wasn't sure how long he had been there. Swinging at the lone bag in the corner of the FBI gym. There was no one around, but who would be working out at 3 o'clock on a Monday.

People who had problems. People who were broken. People like them.

His knuckles stung like someone had just spilled rubbing alcohol on them, but he continued slamming his fists with vigor into the bag, relishing in the blood that stained the bag.

The sweat ran down his face, and he blinked it away, knowing that if he gave in for one moment he'd see her face again in his head. He couldn't stand that.

She had said that she needed time. Time to be away from him, to 'sort thing out'. Whatever the hell that meant. He knew it was just Brennan's way of saying that she wasn't sure if she wanted to be with him.

He **hated** that. That she was so unsure. And he knew the reason for her fear, for her apprehensions. It was him. He had left her. Just when she had needed him the most, he had deserted her.

He punched harder, wishing he could turn back time. That was why she felt she couldn't trust him. He had just been inevitability for her. He had made it possible for her to believe that no one would ever stick with her. For her it was now logical. The abandonment. She had the facts, the rational, the variables. That was his fault.

He didn't want to be just predictability to her. He wanted to be there for her. And he was afraid…so afraid that he had lost that chance.

His fists stung as he collided them hard against the bag, his entire bodies weight forced into that punch.

The things he had said to her. They were unforgivable. The way he had yelled at her. She didn't deserve that. She had just wanted to be honest with him, to tell him how she was feeling, and he had treated her like dirt. Like she was doing something wrong for not trusting him. She shouldn't feel guilty for his mistakes.

He always did this. Screwed things up. His whole life he'd been the one no one could count on. That's why he'd joined the Rangers. To find someone who could count on him. But that had just left him even more scarred then before.

The way people had counted on him, and the way he had let them down…had left him damaged forever. The way he had watched his fellow Rangers, his friends die in front of his eyes. They would tell him to run the life being drained from their eyes right in front of him. He had been the last thing they saw, and he couldn't save them.

He couldn't save Bones either. She probably wouldn't forgive him, and he knew that she would be damaged after that. She would never let anyone in again. He didn't want that for her.

"Booth."

He turned around, his exhaustion finally evident as he stopped punching, the sweat running down his body, his fists bleeding and stinging.

She was standing there. Her face unreadable, her eyes cloudy. She looked as if she was looking right through him.

"Bones, what are you doing here?"

She crossed her arms over her chest in self protection, finally resting her eyes on his.

"I made my decision."

He couldn't help but get his hopes up, she didn't smile. "And?"

"It's over Booth. I can't be with someone who doesn't care."

He clenched his fists, trying to meet her eyes, but she looked everywhere but at him.

"Bones that's not true and you know it."

She shook her head, and he was stunned to see no emotion cross her face. Her eyes were cold. This wasn't the Bones he knew. His Bones.

"Abandonment is a logical sign of not caring Booth."

"I didn't leave you."

"Now I'm leaving you Booth." She turned around, without even a second glance as Booth's heart shattered at her feet.

He yelled after her even after she was long gone, his voice cracking with tears he didn't want to shed. He didn't cry.

"I didn't leave you! I didn't leave you! Come back Bones…"

He punched the wall hard, his fist colliding hard with the cement that could have easily shattered the fragile bones in his knuckles.

"I didn't leave…I'm sorry….I'm so sorry."

He leaned his forehead against the wall, letting the hot tears mix with the sweat running down his face. His fists pressed hard against the blood-stained white cement. She was gone…forever. There was no going back. No going forward. He had lost her.

"Agent Booth! What the hell do you think you're doing?"

Booth blinked, realizing that he was still punching the bag, the blood now running freely down his knuckles, his whole body shaking.

He turned. There was no blood on the wall where he had just been leaning. He sighed in relief. The encounter with Brennan had been a figment of his enraged mind.

_She hasn't gone. I haven't lost her._

Looking straight into the cold eyes of Deputy Director Michael Evans wasn't exactly pleasant.

After Amy had died years ago, Cullen had taken a prolonged leave of absence. He had never come back. Booth understood not wanting to work after his daughter had just died. It was like Brennan had said; he needed "time."

Booth glared back at his superior. Personally he loathed the man. While Cullen had been a hard ass, he had treated Booth and his contemporaries with respect, treating them more as equals, and exerting power when he deemed it necessary.

Evans was just an ass. He treated the agents as though they were far lower then himself, and more so he had treated Brennan like crap the few times he had met her, not meeting her eyes or addressing her properly. Brennan had fumed at this and he had literally had to drag her away.

Booth hadn't shown it, but he wanted to sucker punch the man hard across the face for the disrespect he had shown his partner who was just as important to solving the cases as Booth was.

If he ever wanted to quit the FBI punching Evans would be the first thing he would do.

His angry dark blue eyes appraised Booth with cold curiosity, as he waited for his response.

"I'd like a response Agent, instead of you just standing there with your mouth open. I'm not a mind reader."

He had no problem glaring back at Evans. "Sir, I was just working out with the bags."

Evans rolled his eyes, crossing his arms as if he didn't believe Booth. "You weren't wearing protective gloves as it obvious that your knuckles are bleeding. You are obviously taking out some emotional frustration you have out on the FBI work equipment and I won't have it in my bureau."

Booth frowned, but he knew it was true. He would rather Evans went back to patrolling the rest of the building and left him alone so he could pummel the bag harder.

"What is that supposed to mean? _Sir_?" Booth nearly spat out the last word, his frustration boiling over.

Evans easily caught on to the mocking tone that Booth used to address him, and he sneered in satisfaction, as if he was fishing for a reason to throw Booth out.

"Watch your tone Agent Booth. Your attitude this afternoon hasn't been acceptable. I want you to leave the building, and return when you deem yourself ration again."

Booth took a foreboding step towards Evans, and he could see him flinch even though he tried not to show it.

"You're kicking me out?

He smiled in a sickenly sweet way. Part of Booth thought that he had been wandering the halls hoping to catch Booth doing something which he could reprimand him for. He had gotten it.

"Exactly Agent Booth. You know the way out."

Booth glared at him, trying to let his anger get the best of him. "Yes Sir."

Booth brushed past Evan's in a quick movement. He knew if he stood here any longer he would punch him, and be suspended, even immediately pulled out of the FBI. Permanently.

He needed to get out of here. She was everywhere. In his thoughts, in the air. He was breathing her in, and without her there to help him, he felt like he was suffocating.

* * *

Brennan lied in her bed, above the sheets, staring vacantly up at the ceiling, willing herself to go to sleep.

The sun had set hours ago. She had wished it had taken the afternoons events with it, but they were still settled over her, like dust collecting. She wished that she hadn't tried to go back to her logic.

It had gone so horribly and completely wrong. And she should have known it would. That's why they worked. They were complete and total opposites. They clashed all the time. If Booth thought the suspect was guilty, Brennan argued he was innocent. If Booth said he liked Vanilla ice-cream, Brennan like Chocolate. Booth thought with instinct. Brennan thought with logic.

So logically, the shouldn't have even worked in the first place. But they did. They built off each other. She loved watching Booth when he was really in the zone. She loved watching him interrogate a suspect, because she knew she would never be able to do that, get so far into someone's head. She loved that about Booth.

For the first time, she had been going with her instinct, and then fear had set in. She hadn't known what to do except the logical answer. Push him away.

It seemed like the stupidest thing now. And obviously Booth had been hurt by her "space", he wouldn't have yelled at her like that if he wasn't. She didn't blame him. Her terror had crept up on her without any warning at all, and for once she hadn't been able to push it back down again. It had filled her.

She sighed, shutting her eyes, and moving on the bed, wishing it wasn't so god damned hot. April's weren't supposed to be this hot. She wished it was raining again.

Turning, she looked at the clock. 1:34 am. How had it gotten so late? How long had she been lying on her bed? She thought it had only been a half an hour, but obviously it had been so much longer. She had been consumed by her thoughts.

Just as she was about to get up and drag herself to her bathroom to take a couple of sleeping pills that would clear her mind and guarantee knock her out, she heard a small whimpering from outside her door.

She frowned. She had put Chloe and Sam to bed hours ago, but they didn't have any pets, so unless the neighborhood burglar's new strategy was to whimper, she had to logically believe it was either Chloe or Sam.

The door creaked open slowly, and her eyes which had adjusted to the darkness hours ago, could make out the small silhouette of Chloe clutching the stuffed hippo Angela had given her for her 1st birthday. Chloe never slept without it.

She could hear Chloe's whimpers muffled by the hippo that was pressed against her face, and Brennan could easily see the little girl was upset about something.

She took a few tentative steps towards the bed. "Mommy?"

Sitting up, Brennan eyed the little girl curiously. She didn't know what was wrong.

"Chlo, babe are you ok?"

With the comforting recognition that her mom was awake Chloe ran to her mom, catapulting her self onto the bed and into Brennan's arms, and Brennan could see that she was in hysterics.

Brennan wrapped her arms around Chloe, hugging her protectively as Chloe mumbled quickly and in jumbled syllables to Brennan's shirt.

"Mommy, I had a weally bad nightmawe. I was in ouw house and then the snakes gotted you and you died, and so did Sammy and Boof and it was so scawy mommy! I don't want you to die."

She stroked Chloe's hair, rocking her softly in her lap, trying to calm her down.

"Shhh…its ok Chlo. I'm right here, I'm not going anywhere. Shhh…everything's ok I promise."

"Ok…"

"Is Sammy ok?"

Chloe nodded sleepily, and as Brennan held her she could feel the little girl falling asleep in her arms, her breathing returning to normal as she calmed down.

Brennan tucked Chloe under her covers, and let her sleep, knowing it always felt safer when you were with you parents. For Brennan if always had.

She sat on the edge of her bed, her head in her hands, sighing. She knew the right thing to do. Brennan had never backed down from a fight before, but she had never had this much to risk.

Reaching out for the phone by her bedside, she tip toed out her room, and climbed through the window of the fire escape where she and Booth had sat last night. She leaned over the railing, letting the hot breeze blow her hair against her neck. The city look just as peaceful, but she knew there was one person waiting for her. She didn't want to wait anymore.

Without even looking she dialed the numbers, and put the phone to her ear, waiting for him to pick up.

"Hello?" He sounded half-asleep, and she remembered that it was already almost 2 am, so he had the right to be asleep.

She took a deep breath before continuing. "It's me," There was a pause as he comprehended, and she thought that she heard him hold his breath for a second before letting it out.

"I made up my mind."

**Did she choice him...or not? hmmm...press the button please :)**


	24. Defining Moments

**Mini shortie chapter...its happy though...:))))**

Booth felt himself holding his breath as the silence on the other end seemed all too long. He could hear her taking a deep breath, as moving the phone from one shoulder to the other. He knew that's what she did when she didn't know what to say.

Brennan ran a hand roughly through her hair, licking her lips since they seemed to have become incredibly dry in the seconds that the phone had been silent.

"I thought that I was doing the right thing Booth by giving us some space. But I was wrong. It wasn't your fault that I was afraid of our relationship and how fast it was going."

She stopped, and Booth waited for her to continue. He wasn't sure where this was going or if he wanted to hear it if she was going to tell him that they were done.

Just as Brennan began to speak again, Booth interrupted her. "Bones, listen I have to say something first. Before you say anything else."

She nodded, but Booth just heard the silence. "Is that ok?"

Smiling to spite the seriousness of the moment, "I was nodding."

"Of course you were." She heard the smile in his voice, and wished that he was standing here with her. It felt wrong that he wasn't.

"Bones, I can't loose you. Not again. So no matter how hard it is, or how much space we need, I'm still going to be there. I need to be there."

She smiled, running her hand over the almost rusted railing of the fire escape. "I need you to be there too Booth."

She bit her lip, and sighed. "I shouldn't have pushed you away. I just…everything was going so fast, and I felt like it was going to be yanked out from under me again."

Booth hated himself all over again for the mistakes he had made involving the scientist. He seemed to make the most around her. And the most deadly.

"You have to understand something. When I went to New York, it wasn't like I was choosing Parker over you. It wasn't like I chose a different life over the one I had with you. That you weren't good enough, because you were Bones. You are."

Despite her resolution not to let herself cry, she wiped away the tears that were springing out of her eyes furiously.

"I want to be with you Booth. I never changed my mind. It just seemed logical….it seemed logical to make sure that you wanted to be with me too." He could hear the tears in her voice.

"Hey, don't cry Bones. You know I want you, more than anything. You just have to let me show it sometime, ok?"

She nodded again, wiping away the tears. "Ok."

"Now can I come over, or is that not enough space for you?"

She laughed, although she could think of nothing more she would like then to see his face. "Its 1 in the morning Booth."

"Less traffic, it's a plus."

"If you're not here in 20 minutes I'm going back to sleep."

She could hear the grin in his voice. "I'll be there in 10." The phone clicked off, and Brennan put it down on the fire escape, relieved that she hadn't totally screwed things up. This time.

She sat out there, just watching the empty streets. It was peaceful in DC at night. There were no murders. No taxis honking. The sound of breaking glass and gang fights died down at around midnight, and the soft lull of the cars in the distance was the only sound.

The knock on her door broke the silence, and she hurried to the door, opening it without hesitations. She threw herself into his arms, burying her head into his shoulder, as she felt his strong arms snake themselves around her body, pulling her close to him, letting the curves of their bodies compliment one another.

They stood there for what seemed like forever. He breathed her in, the distance that had been between them seemed like a nightmare ago. All that mattered was that they were there.

And what they say….absence makes the heart grow fonder.

**_:)))))...its fixed..._**


	25. Breathing Again

**Finally the new post…sorry it took so long, only a few more after this…thanks everyone…R/R please ******

Brennan stared out the window, watching as the Wednesday afternoon traffic piled up on the highway, the plethora of angry cars honking at each other. As if that would make the time pass any faster. Luckily, the drive to Chloe and Sam's school was short from the Jeffersonian, and there was no need to even get on the freeway and risk staying on for hours.

Most of the time, she tried to pick them up, but sometimes 3 o'clock rolled by way too quickly, and their regular sitter, Heather would get them from school, and deposit them happily off at the Jeffersonian.

The twins loved their mom's work place, and would spend hours cheerfully watching Zach examine a bone, sitting quietly on stools next to him. At first Brennan and Angela had laughed as Zach flinched under their expectant gazes, but he got used to them surprisingly quickly for someone who had the emotional IQ of a squirrel.

She however, was on strike. Booth could drive around for hours for all she cared. She was the one who knew where the school was. She was the one who could drive there blindfolded, but still he had ended up being the one driving.

"Bones, come on. I'm going to get lost." She wanted to laugh at the pleading in his voice. He deserved it.

She turned to face him, smiling smugly. "That's what you get for not letting me drive."

He groaned, running a hand over his face in frustration. She could drive him completely crazy sometimes. But that went both ways.

"Can you just grow up? It's my car, I'll drive it."

_Alpha-male tendencies. He thinks he owns everything._

She scoffed, smiling at him.. "It's not even your car. It's the FBI's."

He rolled his eyes. "Whatever. Its more mine then yours."

"But logically, I should have driven. I know where the school is."

Booth took one hand off the wheel to try and spell it out to her. She was so literal, and it was one of the things that made him want to kiss her almost 24/7.

"Listen Bones, we're like Batman and Robin. Batman **always** drives. You don't see Robin off and driving the Batmobile, that would just be….wrong."

She looked at him in confusion. "I don't know what that means Booth, and even if it's true, I can drive sometimes." She gave him one last glare, before sighing and pointing to her across his shoulder. "Take a left here."

He smiled at her, before swerving the car generously to turn down Magnolia Avenue where he could see a huge maroon building looming in the distance.

"Thanks Babe." He reached across the seat with his free hand, tracing her jaw line softly, before tilting her chin softly.

She felt the warmth spread throughout her face, and then down to the tips of her toes. She wished she could kiss him, but they'd probably end up crashing the car. As his fingers touched her face, she felt the roughness of bandages, and just as she glanced down, she felt him withdrawing his hands and looking away. How the hell had he gotten bandages on his hands in the 5 hours she hadn't seen him?

She pointed to the curb, figuring she'd ask when they were parked. "You might want to park here. It gets pretty crazy in the parking lot."

He nodded, and executed a perfect parallel park that would have made the DMV proud, turning off the car. Booth made a move to get out of the car, but she stopped him, putting a hand softly on his arm, her eyes meeting his.

She slid her fingers carefully over the bandages that were wrapped tightly over his knuckles. She couldn't believe she hadn't noticed them last night.

"What happened to your hands Booth?"

He ran a finger over the bandages, and then softly over her knuckles. "It doesn't matter."

She looked at him frowning. "Yes it does."

He looked up at her, his eyes dark. "I wasn't wearing gloves when I was punching a bag yesterday. That's all."

She hated that he had hurt himself for her, even if he wasn't going to admit it. Booth was too proud for that. "You know that it rips up your knuckles Booth."

"I needed it to hurt Bones. You wouldn't understand." He wasn't looking at her and it made her feel even more ostracized.

"I wouldn't understand hurting myself on purpose? You don't know me as well as you think you do Booth."

His eyes finally met hers, and he could see that she honestly was worried about him. It wasn't that important. Booth took out his rage with himself, on himself. It was self destructive behavior, but he needed it.

Pulling her to him, he kissed her softly. Enough to reassure her that they were ok, and enough to make her stomach dip significantly. As he pulled back, he kept his fingers tucked under her chin, making sure her glassy eyes stayed with his.

"Listen, it doesn't really matter. I have you, and that's all that matters. We're ok."

She nodded, entwining her fingers in his. "We're better then ok."

"I thought so." She smiled at him, leaning in and brushing her lips with his softly.

"Come on, we can't leave Chloe and Sam waiting," She laughed, "They're not very patient."

He rolled his eyes, laughing, as he followed her out of the car and out into the perfect spring day.

"I wonder where they get that from."

_Me_

She laughed, and waited for him quite, impatiently as he followed her out of the car. It was the perfect day, but still she was dreading telling the twins about Booth.

_How bad can it be?_

* * *

Brennan watched in awe from the comfy red vinyl booth as Booth lifted Chloe and Sam up to observe the variety of choices that Sunshine Ice-cream Parlor offered. She dipped her spoon into the giant sundae that she had chosen for she and Booth.

Usually they would jump up and down wildly, refusing to let her pick them up; instead they tried to read the flavors themselves. Brennan never let them get "chocolate apple" or "raspberry bubble gum spiral" for the very reason that the colorful concoctions would end up in the trash within minutes.

Booth handled them easily, and within minutes they skipped over to there booth, sitting across from Brennan, cones poised eagerly in their little hands.

"Mommy what fwavor did you get?"

Brennan laughed as Chloe licked her giant chocolate ice-cream cone, most of it getting on her face rather then in her mouth.

"Booth and I are sharing a sundae."

"What's Boof's favowite fwavor?" Sam asked her eagerly. He was eating out of a cup, something that looked like Vanilla and gummy bears, but she wasn't sure. Either way, Booth had seemingly worked a miracle, and she planned to thank him in the best way she knew how.

"Why don't you ask him babe?"

Sam nodded, and as Booth sat down next to Brennan, the questions were bombarded at him.

"Boof what's your favowite fwavor? Do you like chocolate? Or spwinkles?"

Booth eyes widened as he laughed, wrapping his arm loosely around her Brennan's shoulders, pulling her close to him.

"I like cookies n' cream, chocolate is my second favorite, and everyone likes sprinkles. I like the multicolored ones."

They nodded, and concentrated on their ice-cream, satisfied with his answers. Booth glanced over at his partner, who was devouring the ice-cream faster then he could get in his spoon.

"Hey save some for the rest of us." He smiled at her as she dropped her spoon, blushing madly.

"I didn't each lunch. I'm hungry."

He took a bite of the ice-cream, and kissed her softly on the cheek, grinning at her adorable embarrassment.

"I'm just kidding babe. Eat as much as you want."

She playfully glared at him. "No I'm done."

He groaned, at her stubbornness. "Just eat the ice-cream Bones."

She smiled, taking a spoonful and eating it with the enthusiasm of the twins. Ice-cream was her favorite after all.

"Chlo, Sammy, how's the ice-cream?"

They smiled enthusiastically back at their mom. "Yummy mommy!"

"Yeah yummy!" Brennan smiled at their excitement. She knew part of it was that Booth had picked them up with Brennan. They were enamored with him, and that was a good thing. Hopefully the news they were about to break would go over well.

"Could we tell you something while you're eating?"

Chloe nodded, biting down on her ice-cream cone with great dexterity. "Sure mommy."

Brennan nudged Booth in the ribs. "I tried to tell you this, but you fell asleep. And I think that its better that Booth is here."

They watched her intently, and waited for her to continue. Booth entwined their fingers under the table, squeezing them reassuringly.

"What I want to tell you is that…Booth is..."

She trailed off, not knowing how to say it. It seemed so blunt to just blurt it out. But she had always been blunt.

Booth interjected, knowing that he should really be the one to tell them. It was his mess and he needed to finally clean it up.

"Your mom and I used to be a couple. Your mom had you and I didn't know, because before you two were born, I had to move to New York City for a while."

They looked at him expectantly. "I don't know what that means Boof."

Booth sighed, glancing over at Brennan quickly. "It means that I'm your dad."

Brennan nearly coughed on her ice-cream. That was straightforward enough. Booth had done it. Her stomach felt like it was on a roller coaster ride as she watched Chloe and Sam comprehended.

"Does that mean you get to live wif us?" Sam looked so excited, and Brennan felt relieved. Booth had been right. They weren't going to really ask questions until they were much older.

Chloe jumped out of the booth, and launched herself into Booth's arms, Sam following close behind. "And we get to haf a dad. I can't wait to tell all of our fwiends!"

They climbed into Booth's lap, as he hugged them tightly. Brennan watched, feeling like a weight had just been lifted off her shoulders. Like she didn't have anything pulling her down anymore. She was free.

"Mommy said that you always rescwued her. Now you can reswue us too!" They both hugged him again tightly, and then jumped off his lap, knowing that their ice-cream was melting quickly. Booth was happy that their priorities were straight.

Booth looked over at Brennan, whose huge sapphire eyes looked surprisingly glassy, as if tears were about to spill. He knew she'd been alone with them for so long, that this was probably a bit overwhelming. He snaked his arm around her waist, pulling her into him, and leaning down to whisper softly into her ear.

"You rescued me Bones. In everyway possible."

She leaned up, kissing him softly, his fingers hooking around the base of her neck, pulling her closer to him, not wanting to let her go.

_We're finally safe._

**The button loves you….**


	26. Full Circle

**This is the final chapter guys...thanks for everyone who reviewed and continued reading, your reviews were great...:)) Enjoy...**

_2 Months Later_

The hot June sun beat down on Brennan's face, warming her lips and making her want to tear the stupid blindfold off more than ever. They passed under a patch of shade, the cool air departing quickly as it had come. Brennan assumed her second of solace had come from a large tree or building, but she honestly had no idea where they were since Booth had wrapped the silk tie around her eyes what seemed like hours ago.

"You still can't tell me where we're going?"

Booth groaned and he kept the strong hold on her shoulders, directing her from behind. Ever since the blindfold had come on Brennan hadn't been able to keep her mouth shut. Not that he _really_ minded.

"Nope Bones, sorry." He laughed as she glared at him through the blindfold. "And the reason you want to know so badly is because you have control issues."

She blindly reached out to hit him, but missed, swiping at the air and eliciting a chuckle from Booth.

"I don't have control issues. Lets try and blindfold you and see how you feel?"

She could feel him lean down close to her, and his lips brush her ear softly. "It depends what you're going to be doing."

"Booth!" Laughing, she shoved him away, crimson creeping up her cheeks.

"I'm just kidding Bones….sort of." She felt him wrap and arm around her shoulder, imagining the mischievous grin that was playing across his face.

He turned her sharply, and she felt her foot step up on a curb. They were in the shade again, the cool shadows dancing lightly on her face. In the distance she could hear kids playing, their laughter echoing in her ear. The light afternoon breeze blew her hair across her face, tickling her lips. Without her eyes, she could feel her senses automatically heightened. It was a weird sensation.

"Are we almost there Booth? I'm getting tired of walking."

His fingers brushed lightly over the silk tie that he'd used as a makeshift blindfold.

"Good thing we are, cause I'm getting tired of your complaining too."

She didn't respond, but merely glared at him through the blindfold. Her stomach fluttered nervously as she felt him closer to her again, his lips near her ear.

"So I know this is a big thing…and that we're taking things slowly, but we all don't exactly fit in one apartment. I want to make things," He paused, taking a breath. "Real between us…" She felt his fingers entwine loosely in hers.

She frowned in confusion, wondering what was going on. Being with Booth was the only time she ever felt completely clueless. "I don't understand Booth."

"Wait…" His fingers expertly untied the knot, the blindfold dropping from her eyes. She squinted, her eyes adjusted to the sudden flow of bright light.

They were standing on the sidewalk in a neighborhood she presumed was in the more rural part of DC. As she got a better look around, she realized how pretty the neighborhood really was. The sidewalks were lined with towering umbrella trees, casting graceful shadows down the road where a group of teenage boys were playing hockey at the end of the block.

Each of the houses were genial and friendly looking, flowers blooming from their windows, and swings in the backyards. They looked like the kind of houses that Brennan had dreamed about living in during her time in the system. The kids who had families lived in those houses.

As she turned around, she realized that they were standing directly in front of a large exquisitely built wooden house with a gorgeous looping porch that seemingly followed the entire house. What really caught her eye was the "For Sale" sign that was stuck in the front of the perfectly groomed lawn.

Her mind worked quickly, going over Booth's words in her head, _We all don't exactly fit in one apartment._ The "For Sale" sign, the perfect size of the house, which appeared to have enough space for all of them.

Out of reflex she pulled a hand to her mouth, the shock of it making her stomach dip wildly. Booth wanted to buy a house with her. To live with her. In a house. It felt like something out of the movie that should have been her life.

"Oh my god Booth…" She trailed off, still slightly speechless, "You're….we're…you want to buy a house."

Booth tried to read the surprise etched all across her face, and it was easy to as the wide grin took over her pretty features. He figured now would be a good time.

Pulling the keys out of his pocket, he jingled them in front of her face, smiling widely.

"Correction Bones. I did buy the house."

Her eyes widened, as she smiled, and in a second she had thrown herself at him, wrapping her arms around him tightly. Booth pulled her close to him, lifting her off the ground so her feet dangled slightly as he pressed his face into her sweet smelling hair. She laughed happily, and he felt himself smiling.

As he let her down, she kept her arms wrapped around his neck loosely. "Booth, I can't believe that you…you bought us a house, and I…I don't even know what to say, I mean do we have enough money for this…do you?"

He shook his head without concern, the look of utter peace with the world that she envied so much dancing across his features.

"You could ask for a tour."

Sighing happily, she smiled in surrender as she tilted her head towards the surreal house behind them. "Ok, can I have a tour?"

"Definitely." With a wide grin, he pulled her across the lawn and up the stairs of the house that they would soon call their home.

She ran a hand over the artistically crafted wooden walls of what would ultimately become their bedroom. The entire house was build of wood, with the air of someone who knew exactly what they were doing. It felt safe, comfortable. Like she was meant to be here.

"It's beautiful Booth. All of it."

He watched as she walked over to the giant picture window from where the Washington Memorial was just visible from beneath the sprawling backyard. Closing his eyes he could almost hear Chloe and Sam chasing each other on the grass while Parker followed close behind.

Crossing the room to stand next to her, he snaked an arm around her waist, pulling her close to him, the curves of her body complimenting his perfectly.

"There was just something about it, you know? I felt like this was where we're supposed to be."

She leaned into him, her cheek brushing against his shoulder softly. "I know what you mean."

Turning, she propped herself up onto the high window sill so that they were at eyelevel. He sensed that she wasn't done speaking, so he just watched as she bit her lip, as if she was inwardly debating to share whatever was plaguing her with him.

Motioning towards the other rooms outside of theirs, she smiled. "I mean this is perfect Booth. There are at least 5 other bedrooms close to us so that Chloe and Sam don't get scared. When Parker gets older, he'll be able to have his space. And so will we." She smiled at him, and he could see the familiar mischievous sparkle in her crystal blue eyes.

She shook her head though, looking down and then back up at him. "Nobody has ever done something like this for me Seeley. Ever since I got out of college, I always lived in an apartment. I was too scared to live in a house. Houses make you vulnerable. They hold memories…but now, I'm not afraid," She looked up at him, and he thought he caught a glimpse of tears, but they were gone as fast as they were there. "I want the memories…with you."

He cupped her face with his hands, bringing her lips close to his, her crystal eyes shining. He kissed her sweetly. The kind of kiss that doesn't need to be followed by something more. A kiss that makes your heart feel like it missed a beat, and sets off fireworks in your chest. It made her believe that things between them would always be like this. Maybe they would be.

Booth pulled away slowly, their lips keeping the vital contact until the last second. He pulled her fingers into his, pulling her softly off the ledge.

"Come on, I want to show you something."

She nodded, following him quietly, her eyes taking in every inch of the house as they went. Stopping in the middle of the hallway, Booth pulled down a chain that she hadn't even noticed was there. Out of nowhere, stairs descended from the ceiling, and stopped with a thud as Booth smiled at her encouragingly.

"Where are we going? You're not taking me to secretly kidnap me are you?"

He rolled his eyes as he reached out his hand for his girlfriend to take. "Stop being so defiant Bones. I promise you're going to like this."

"Fine, but don't be so bossy." She grabbed his hand as he led her up the stairs to what seemed to be some sort of attic, although not quite as menacing as people seemed to write their attics in books. It was made out of the same wood the entire house was, and looked like a nice enough place, but she wondered why he had taken her up here.

He saw the look on her face and he laughed. "If you're wondering, no we're not up here to see the attic."

She cracked a smile as he led her across the sprawling attic, and to a little wooden door that appeared to not go anywhere. He however opened it, and she stepped through, surprised when she felt the warm outdoor breeze whip her hair across her face.

They were standing on what seemed like a rooftop porch. It wasn't very big, probably 10 by 10, but the view was spectacular, spanning across DC, the monuments were visible in the distance. The only difference from this and the fire escape was instead of the honking of horns and the flashing lights of cars, she only saw the monuments hiding far away in between thickets of deep green trees.

She leaned against the railing, taking in everything that had happened in the last 45 minutes. It was a lot, but she had never been happier.

Feeling his presence standing next to her before he spoke, she turned to look at him.

"I thought that since you had the fire escape at your apartment, that you would, you know…want somewhere that's yours…" He trailed off and she slid her fingers into his, squeezing gently.

She watched the uncertainty play in his eyes, and she felt like crying. For the first time in her life, someone really cared. He had done this all for her. To make her happy. She had wanted that for as long as she could remember. And he had always been there.

All she needed to do was open her eyes.

Looking up at him, she smiled, keeping their fingers entwined. "Ours Booth. It's ours."

He snaked his arms around her, keeping their fingers tangled, the wind whipping carelessly across their faces. His lips were close to her ear as he leaned down to rest his chin on her shoulder.

"You know, even after everything that's happened, you're the only one that I could imagine having this with Booth…This life."

She turned her head to face him, smiling softly. He'd never seen her look happier. "It's perfect Booth. All of it. It's perfect."

He moved his hand to tilt her chin closer to him, kissing her softly. "I thought so too."

Their love had never been normal. It was complicated, and addictive, and enthralling. Hard to let go of. Their souls had ached for each other, the pain and suffering only overthrown by pure need. It was impossible to live without the other.

They had finally found each other, and they were going to fight to hell to never let go.

**Its over...please for the last time, hit the button 4 me...;P**


End file.
